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Some Days


malign

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Some days, I can joke, but it doesn't touch me. I get tired of making forlorn posts about myself; they don't help that much anyway. And I feel like I "should know better", and shouldn't need to, should know how to move on to the next step of starting to cope with it.

Some days, I don't know better. I feel like going home and hiding, but on the other hand, I feel like going out and eating a ton just to feel better. Doesn't matter that I know neither one will help.

Maybe I should try something else I know won't help, like sitting down in the middle of a crowded restaurant and screaming. I probably won't, but I think it might help to challenge myself: if you're going to do something counterproductive, you might as well go whole-hog.

Ha. Did I just talk myself out of doing something stupid? Maybe. Maybe I'll just have (a reasonable amount of) something to eat and go home. Take care, y'all.

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