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So I looked Into The Mirror For Several Hours Straight


AmericanPsycho

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I did to find out who I am and what my place in society is. As I peered into my pupils I thought about my entire past. My place isn't to be friends with anyone. My place isn't to have a so-called normal life. My place in society is to be violent. I was bred, born, and raised to be violent. Desensitized by violence in the home and on tv beginning at the toddler stage. I'm comfortable in a violent environment. I don't excel at much but I do when it comes to violence, glorious violence.

At least I'm not a hypocrite by pretending to be something I'm clearly not.

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I have stared my evil witch in the face, too.

I think facing these facts about people is something that we as a society need to do. Unfortunately, who better to do that than those/us who know those environments so well.

You write well. Short, to the point, articulate. Something (positive, productive, useful) to be said about that, I think.

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So you feel like we're put on earth to do the easiest thing?

I would've thought that having a hard life would teach that there _is_ no easier path ...

I went through almost 22 brutal years of Hell by MYSELF mind you. I don't drink and I don't use illegal drugs. I don't have any felony convictions. I'm not a career criminal. Got two misdemeanors from 2002 but that's not even remotely close to being bad. I DESERVE to have it easy and rest a while.

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Well, I understand that life has been hard, AP. I wasn't saying that it wasn't.

I'm just not sure that anyone gets "easy", at least not linked to what they deserve. Too, I think we're starting to mix up the definition of "easy", because violence is by no means easy.

You do seem to have handled it better in some ways than others. Certainly, some people do become felons or addicts. On the other hand, have you considered that there might be things you could work on, that would maybe make life easier for you?

I also wondered how you were able to determine your place in society by staring into the mirror. Is it possible that, instead, you were finding out more about how you feel, inside your own head? Maybe society has different priorities, or plans for you, or opportunities ...

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Well' date=' I understand that life has been hard, AP. I wasn't saying that it wasn't.

I'm just not sure that anyone [u']gets "easy", at least not linked to what they deserve. Too, I think we're starting to mix up the definition of "easy", because violence is by no means easy.

You do seem to have handled it better in some ways than others. Certainly, some people do become felons or addicts. On the other hand, have you considered that there might be things you could work on, that would maybe make life easier for you?

I also wondered how you were able to determine your place in society by staring into the mirror. Is it possible that, instead, you were finding out more about how you feel, inside your own head? Maybe society has different priorities, or plans for you, or opportunities ...

I'm at a stand still for the time being. The Staff at the Bowen Center wants to set me up with Vocational Rehab. The closest Vocational Rehab Center is 20 miles away. This Fall I'm going to start putting money in a safe deposit box at the Bank. By Spring I'll have enough money to buy an used Motorcycle on Craigslist.

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