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Was it my fault?


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Was I the one who caused this downfall in my life ? Out of 99.9 % of the community I was the only one who went wrong ? In the end it was my fault :'(  All I need was discipline and self-control but I wasn't conscious of what the end result would bring . I remember being ask if I am a boy or a girl and others asking one another what am I ? Not being developed has its huge downfall the laughter and ridicule on a daily basis . Rejection from the others is clearly visible. Finding clothes  to hide the  deformity is impossible. :'(  How do I smile through it all ? :'(  I can't change the past its all gone . what did i learn from it all  ? I remember my neighbor 18 yr old son pulling my pants down when I was 5 yrs old . porn was viewed too early as well . The fantasy of wanting to have sex with girls came too early . By the time I had hit 13 yrs it was over for me . :'(  

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Yeah, how could it be your fault when it's nothing that you had any control over? And a lot of things feel like they're over for us when we're 13 or when we're young, but they rarely ever are. Like most of us here on this board, the real problem is in between our ears, not in between our legs, so there should be no reason why you can't turn your life around, But Resolute is right, none of this sounds at all like it is your fault.

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