Pure "O" OCD and PANIC

[anthony82]

I have a horrible affliction which has commonly been referred to as pure "O" OCD. People with this subset of OCD are most prominently affected by the unwanted thought patterns. This can obviously lead to panic as the anxiety builds. I had a terrible bout of panic almost exactly a year ago to this day that lasted months as I tried to quit taking citalopram cold turkey. It sent me into a state of shock where I was both in a state of constant panic as well as intense physical pain. Every waking second, which was a lot, I genuinely thought I was dying. All of this could have been avoided had my doctor been more informed on our condition. The doctor subsequently put me on clonazepam along with the citalopram and that was equally as horrifying. As the drug made it's way back into my system it intensified the anxiety to the point where I had made several trips to the hospital. They didn't do much to help either. Eventually I weaned myself off of the clonazepam (which I would compare to a withdrawal of a major narcotic) and am now solely on 10mgs of citalopram, the least in years! I know you've probably heard it a million times but exercise has helped me more than any drug possibly could. I work out even when I feel anxious and it seems to help. Anyway the only real lingering problem is that I have a hard time in social situations, though only sometimes. I feel like I have lost the ability to love or feel a connection to anybody, and I genuinely feel that people can sense that subconsciously and thus avoid me. It's a very unpredictable condition, you never know when it's going to "flare up". I find it hard to sleep most nights, but when I do sleep, it seems to help a great deal. I think if physicians took this disorder seriously, as everyone I seem to see doesn't, then we would all be better off. Also therapy is far too expensive, there should be some sort of legislation in the near future that changes that. DOes anybody else agree?

[finding my way]

Hi anthony82, and welcome to our community. Thank you for sharing your story, I'm sure it will benefit those who are also struggling to get proper care! Don't give up on your social situation. It is so hard to be comfortable around people when you yourself are feeling so uncomfortable with what you are going through and how your body feels. A strategy might be to socialize after you've had good exercise, so you are at your most comfortable point physically. Or try exercising with others as a social event. Try not to be too hard on yourself!! Those are some tough things you are dealing with:o

[Guest ASchwartz]

Hi Anthony82,

You are describing a "classic" type of situation in which some psychiatrists rely only on medication to treat these types of disorders rather than psychotherapy. The fact is that ocd or "o" responds well to cognitive behavioral psychoterapy and that is what I recommend you try with a good clinical psychologist. As far as exercise is concerned it is now well established that it helps reduce depression, anxiety and stress.

Allan

[anthony82]

thanks Allan, I've been in contact with a doctor a few times but can't really afford to pay her $100.00 per visit fee

[Guest ASchwartz]

Hi Anthony,

I understand about finances. How about using some self help techniques. We have a self help book online here at our website. There are lots of suggestions for things you can do to help yourself reduce this thing. Also, there are self help books in the book stores worth looking at. In many ways, it is possible to teach yourself to use CBT techniques. Lastly, there may be some good mental health clinics in your area that have greatly reduced fees and there are good clinical social workers who will accept low fees.

Allan