finally a decent day!

[shanrucas]

Have to say after the rapid cycling I went throught this weekend, I actually had a decent day today. I got to be outside, worked with horses and managed to stay away from all things that are triggers for me. I guess it shows that there is always a bit light at the end of the tunnel, even if I just step into that light briefly, it's refreshing.

I know that the reality of this feeling can be very temporary, especially now that I am back home and must resume my role as caregiver to my mother. but presently she is comfortable and sleeping. I am hoping to get a couple of hours of sleep, gonna try. But it was nice to have a mental break, however short it may end up being.

[Guest ASchwartz]

Hi Shanrucas,

Please pardon me for asking questions as I have been away on vacation and I have not had the chance to meet you. I know that you may have answered these or talked about these:

Are you in treatment for your Bipolar?

Do you take medication?

Are you in psychotherapy for it?

Have you learned how to control it?

Again, I am playing catch-up and hope you don't mind too much.

Allan:)

[shanrucas]

Hi it's nice to meet you. I have to say I find this community very supportive, thanks for all you do.

As for your questions, yes I am suppose to be on medication was diagnosed bipolar II in 2003, medications do help, but since I was layed off of work about 3 years ago I lost my insurance, I save what I can to go see my doctor when I need to. He often doesn't have enough samples to give me, it's difficult to get to doctor or just about anywhere since I am homebound a majority of the time. My mother is in progressive stage of MS and needs 24 hour care and we can only afford one part-time caregiver at this time. She pays out of pocket for this care from retirement.

I have learned to do what I must to control it on my own. I admit it is difficult at times due to the stress of taking care of her and worrying where the money goes, but I do what I can. I am trying to get myself to a place where I can continue my online schooling for medical transcriber which is designed to work from the home, but recently I took a break due to some issues of my mom.

There is no respite care here where I live to take a break, what respite care there is mom would have to pay out of pocket for.

She is an incredible person and is my rock, she has been in progressive stage for 9 years now, and has an incredilble outlook in life, no matter how bad of a night she me have due to discomfort she wakes up and has a smile on her face. She keeps going like that, she's inspiration..but its hard sometimes not to feel that my life is on hold while I go through this journey with her.

Even though she is not on hospice I have access to a wonder counselor through there, so that does help, I only have to make a donation to go see him.

If you have any suggestions or feel there is something more I should be doing or have more questions I would be happy to answer them or hear what anyone has to say.

Shannon

[Lindamomof7]

Hi Shannon

have you tried contacting the company that makes your medication? Sometimes they have programs set up for those who cannot afford it.

Also contact your local NAMI (national assoc. of mental illness) or DBSA (depression bipolar support alliance), they might be able to help you find help in your area especially for medication assistance.

[shanrucas]

Thanks Linda, I will do that. I had tried to go through a local low cost clinic here..what a nightmare. I was treated very rudely there. I did get a perscription filled at the cost of $80 though, however it wasn't for the mgs I was originally perscribed..I have since heard they are not accepting clients without proof of insurance.

so I welcome your suggestions and will give it a try

Shannon

[Lindamomof7]

Great let me know how you make out