Anxious, trouble sleeping, eating

[reggie]

We have lost a great deal of money in the stock market crash and it has changed our lives. We come from very modest backgrounds but my wife and I worked hard all our lives and retired a bit early. Now almost all our savings are gone and we are forced to look for jobs for the first time in 5 years. We have been out talking to agencies but find that many people are looking for jobs and there are few openings. And hiring starts to freeze as the holidays approach. We have savings for a few months but no real guarantee of getting job(s) before the money runs out. We've never been in a situation like this in our lives. I have trouble sleeping and my stomach is constantly uneasy.

I'm generally a positive and upbeat person but I feel like I'm overwhelmed and have no control. It's a very frustrating and depressing situation. I've been reading books about happiness and the writings on this website about 'emotional resilience' are helpful but positive thoughts seem to last just minutes and then my analytical mind goes back to worrying.

Any helpful thoughts or advice would be appreciated.

[USMarine]

Hi there; i don't really know what to say, but saw that no one else was replying to you at all so i figured i'd see if i might be able to help out. i did three tours of caombat in iraq as a united states marine, and am currently on my fourth tour of duty in Afghanistan as a soldier in the army. part of my anger and stress amanagement classes that i am volunteerily taking hae to do with stress, anxiety and other issues like anger, worry, loss of appetite etc. we have been instructed to counter these emotional feelings which bring on physical symptoms by keeping a "gratitude" notebook.

The thought be behind the notebook is that you right down all of the things you have in life that you are grateful for to counter act the things that are bothering you. for me this is very easy to do without the notebook because of the famin and horrors of war that i have personally witnessed and partook of. anyway, i wish you the best of luck, and know that my ears are always open if ever you need someone to talk to.

[WinterSky]

We have lost a great deal of money in the stock market crash and it has changed our lives. We come from very modest backgrounds but my wife and I worked hard all our lives and retired a bit early. Now almost all our savings are gone and we are forced to look for jobs for the first time in 5 years. We have been out talking to agencies but find that many people are looking for jobs and there are few openings. And hiring starts to freeze as the holidays approach. We have savings for a few months but no real guarantee of getting job(s) before the money runs out. We've never been in a situation like this in our lives. I have trouble sleeping and my stomach is constantly uneasy.

I'm generally a positive and upbeat person but I feel like I'm overwhelmed and have no control. It's a very frustrating and depressing situation. I've been reading books about happiness and the writings on this website about 'emotional resilience' are helpful but positive thoughts seem to last just minutes and then my analytical mind goes back to worrying.

Any helpful thoughts or advice would be appreciated.

Gosh I know just how difficult it is to get through those tough financial times. I've had money and I've been without. But I do think USMarine hit the nail on the head. You might also want to see a doctor about getting a mild sedative to take occasionally.

What about getting assistance like food stamps, unemployment, etc. Might try that. Keep talking as we are listening.

[reggie]

Dear Marine,

Thanks for posting. I've done a little of the grateful listing thing. Maybe I will do more. I have thought about our soldiers overseas and others who have things worse than I.

I just got up from a sleepness time thinking about what went wrong, what I should have done different and how my world went upside down in just a few weeks. You can drive yourself nuts thinking too much about the past.

[USMarine]

I know exactly what you mean about the past driving you crazy, that's my biggest issue with my PTSD. sometimes i have a hard time being grateful for things, not all of the time, but sometimes, and that for me is because sometimes i feel guilty for still being a live, for taking some of the lives that i had to, or doing some of th3e htings that i have done. it's a trap that i am constantly trying to manuever around. hopefuly you don't have this problem. if you can avoid it, don't blame yourself for the way that things are turning out, i seriously doubt that you woke up one day and decided to have all of these things go wrong yah know?

i bet you money that you are a great provider, and that your work ethics are well above 90% of the countries workers. please keep in touch, and remember that i am always here if for nothing other than someone to talk to.

[Proverbs31:28]

I am a worrier by nature and tend to think and rethink and overthink things. When anxiety sets in, racing thoughts are a big part of the picture and your mind swells with thoughts of "what if" and "what now" and, unfortunately, we turn those thoughts over in our minds again and again. I have long-time chronic anxiety but it counds to me that, even with a situational problem likes yours, it is very similar. Have you talked to your doctor about getting something to help you sleep or just "take the edge off?" Do you have anything that you find calming that may help? Counting backwards, visualization, etc. I am not the best at identifying coping skills and work on it every day but I wanted to let you know you're not alone and I sincerely hope you find your peace (and a job) soon.

[reggie]

Lifeless (you need a more upbeat name :-),

Gee, your thinking sounds a lot like mine when I'm in a funk.

I'm not much into pills. I have some OTC sleep pills but haven't used them. I don't have trouble at night - I wake up too early and then can't get back to sleep. If I take a pill then, I'll be sleeping all day.

I do meditation and yoga. It helps for a while.

It does help to be reminded I'm not alone.

Peace and good luck to you too. And to all who have posted.

[Guest ASchwartz]

Hi Reggie and lifeless,

I agree with you that the name "lifeless" does not evoke much in the way of lightness. In fact, I even wonder to what extent the name "lifeless" keeps you feeling down or in a "funk." Of course, each of us has the right to use any name we wish, so long as it is not offensive to others. So, lifeless, no pressure to change you name. I even believe you and I mentioned this once before. Are you really comfortable with "lifeless" as your name and are you sure it does not pull you down?

Allan

[Proverbs31:28]

Hi Reggie and lifeless,

I agree with you that the name "lifeless" does not evoke much in the way of lightness. In fact, I even wonder to what extent the name "lifeless" keeps you feeling down or in a "funk." Of course, each of us has the right to use any name we wish, so long as it is not offensive to others. So, lifeless, no pressure to change you name. I even believe you and I mentioned this once before. Are you really comfortable with "lifeless" as your name and are you sure it does not pull you down?

Allan

Allan, you may well be right. The fact is, when I found this forum I was severely, severely depressed and felt completely dead inside. I was extremely suicidal and saw no point in living. When I registered I had to come up with a name and all I could think of was how "lifeless" I felt inside. Honestly, I didn't realize changing my name was an option and am not sure how to do it, anyway. Not sure what I'd change it to, but if you point me in the right direction I'm sure I could come up with something.