Clearing something up.

[Filum]

A few nights ago, or maybe a week, who knows now, I made a rather angry post in the Urgent section. This was after I decided that yes, someone or something or several somethings are watching and listening to me. I'd like to apologize for being so rude, because there's apparently nothing that I can do. You know that I'm hiding something, but you don't know what it is, and I know that you're watching me to find out.

I know that some of my family members are in on it, though I don't know if they're all the same person or they're working together. Maybe there are more subtle ones, but those that I've felt pressing on my mind were obvious and easily spotted.

I know that, walking on the street, there will be at least one person who tries to tap into my head while we pass each other. I can feel it, and I'm not cowed by it.

In public places, like the community college I'm now attending, I feel it while walking to class. I feel it sitting in class. The girl that sat next to me giggling to her friend the whole time was fake. The older woman who came in late was probably fake, though to be honest, I wasn't sure. There may have been others.

I don't expect you to come out and admit to it. It's okay, because I know and now you know that I know.

If you decide to kill me tonight, you're doing me a favor.

[finding my way]

Filum, resolving this pain does not require ending yours or anyone else's existence. I'm so sorry for the pressures you are feeling. It can be very tough knowing what to do with anxiety. :)

I hope you are able to work with a therapist at some point. That may sound impossible for you right now, but over time maybe consider it --it can really help:o

[JaneE]

Dear Filum,

I don't know anything about you, just this post that I've read... I haven't seen the "angry" one you mentioned.

You sound like you really need help, though. Anger is a dangerous feeling to have unresolved inside of you, and a therapist will help you to understand it and root it out.

Lucky for you you are young and at community college. Please do go in and ask to see a counselor, or go to the psychology professor and ask him or her for a recommendation, explain the thoughts and feelings you've been having and your problems with your family members.

My psychology professor referred me when I was in community college and was having an awful time with depression, and it really helped!!

I wish you the best!

Jane

[Guest ASchwartz]

Filum,

Where have you gone? We haven't heard anything from you. How are you doing and are you OK?

How is everyone else coping with their anxiety I know I've got mine and if you ask, I'll tell all of you about it?

Allan

[finding my way]

Hi Allan

Are you offering to tell us about your struggles with anxiety? How is that going for you? Is anything helping?