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Suicide thoughts

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hey there im austin..and on august 23rd 2011 i ate a chunk of raw canibis which set of schizophrenia...i have been going to school and trying to get on with my life..but my life is just so scary everyday...i cant take it anymore..what causes a mind to become psychotic? I cant take it anymore..seeing things i once enjoyed before this all started..im fanastizing about killing myself everyday..i just cant cope anymore im like trapped in a nightmare i cant wake up from..is there any hope for my future. Only 4 months ago i was the hapiest guy on earth had my future planed out..felt never better.But now im just a shell of who i used to be..the paranoid thoughts..the delusions..the depresion..the psychosis...ive just grown tired. This time last year i was happy as lary.I drank some alchihol the other night to see if it would take my symptoms away a little...it has done be no favours. Ive been smoking like a chimney.Is death such a bad thing when one is suffering

Edited by bukendaa
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