Penis & Manhood/Inconsistent self perceptions

[Thermonuclear Warrior]

I haven't posted here in a while because I was finally able t put this issue aside and focus on other things in life. However, my family constantly pressures me and reminds me of the fact that I'm 24 and still without any sense of a relationship. They want grand children, and little do they know that I'm not even able to approach a woman intimately. This has been mainly because of my penis insecurities. Lately, I've been constantly obsessing over the fact that I'm less than average and that I'm not worthy of procreation. However, the scientist in me then took over.

If fertility was determined by penis size alone, why would countries with statistically smaller penis sizes such as India and China be the most overpopulated? If a woman is seeking a family, why would she place the penis as a desirable trait? Perhaps a larger penis leads to orgasms, and orgasms increase the chance of conception due to the vacuum effect. However, it seems that many women cannot orgasm from penetration anyway....so it really is more up to the sperm to resist the acidic vaginal juices. So since I'm not worried at all about being able to conceive, what is my problem?

I'm mainly thinking about a woman's needs and desires and that is my problem. Why should I give a fuck if I'm not big enough to give them pleasure? For the past few months, this was my attitude and I felt that a woman's sexual needs did not matter. A woman should be grateful that I'm willing to even give her my awesome seed. I'm not hideous looking and my intelligence is luckily above average, my personality is unconventional and I actually am not interested in using a woman just for sex...

If a woman does reject me for having a 5 inch penis with a 4.75 inch girth, then she might as well be launched into a volcano. Every member of society that views a large penis as a sign of manhood and pleasure, needs to be driven off a cliff or into the grand canyon. Women should ask these questions to themselves 1) Is the big penis going to marry me? 2) Is the big penis going to treat me nicely 3) Is the big penis going to give me kids that aren't complete morons?

It's the above attitude that kept me sane the past few months....well lately I've been back to square one. I'm barely 5 inches in length and 4.5-4.75 around (approximate average) This is below average and well just being below average is a horrible feeling. Knowing my friends are all enjoying sex all the time while I'm left to fantasize about things that simply cannot happen, is depressing. I'm 1.5 inches away from the micro-penis territory I suppose. And all my friends are either 1-2 inches longer than me...so I'm basically in micro-penis territory throughout my social circles.

I have friends that are more than 1.5 inches longer than me and they're the ones that are constantly having sex with various partners. People like this taint women for the million of people that share the same type of penis that I do. My problem is that I want to enjoy sex and that procreation is honestly the least of my concerns right now. Sure as a father/husband I may be desirable, but as a sex partner, I feel worthless. Sex with a short/narrow penis leaves little enjoyment for both parties. Knowing that I'm not even average is depressing...sure there are millions of people like me, but the majority of people that I encounter are likely to be larger and that means that it's very likely that the women I engage with sexually will habe experienced larger men and may feel that I'm inadequate.

Nothing can be accomplished from this post other than a means of ventilation. The only thing that will remedy my situation is that A) either I find a woman with which there is a mutual enjoyment of sex, or increase my penis size to at least average level so that I am likely to at least feel normal.The best point in my life was recently in which I was able to move on from this insecurity/obsession. I was very happy and completely did away with this subject for a while. I think it's key to have hobbies and view life outside of sex. I know I'll never be able to enjoy sex like others due to my lack of endowment and that is something I need to come to terms with. I honestly just hope that I find a woman that will be able live with this tradeoff. I'm healthy and I have a good genetic history free of many diseases, i have a decent paying job, I wouldn't use a woman for sex...I figure all these traits still make me a desirable mate and that is the attitude I need to live with. I need to stop thinking about sex and forget about all the fantasies my mind has taken in thanks to the adult entertainment industry, and the general media.