Ernold Same Posted March 14, 2012 Report Share Posted March 14, 2012 I just can't go on anymore.There's absolutely nothing and nobody that makes me want to go any further with my life.I hate everything I used to enjoy. I hate myself.I realized I never liked being alive. It's always been a struggle for me. I wish I was never born.I see life as a punishment. I must have done something terrible in a past life and now I'm paying for it.It's cool if there are people out there who enjoy being alive, I'll just never be one of them.I tried to get better. I contacted a psychologist and we met for the first time last week and I could tell she wasn't going to be able to help me. It's not her fault though.I want to get drunk and jump off a bridge (can't do it sober).I feel so stupid for putting up with all this shit for so long, and for what? Nothing! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IrmaJean Posted March 14, 2012 Report Share Posted March 14, 2012 I'm sorry you are hurting so much, Ernold. I hear your sadness and discouragement.I understand that it is difficult to see right now, but you have the power to make positive changes in your life. Sometimes our thought patterns can make us feel worse about our lives and ourselves. I see life as a punishment. I must have done something terrible in a past life and now I'm paying for it.This might be a good place to start in therapy. You can come to see things differently with a more positive outlook on life's possibilities.It's cool if there are people out there who enjoy being alive' date=' I'll just never be one of them.[/quote']You have to allow for the possibility first. It may be difficult to see any hope right now' date=' but there is always hope. I tried to get better. I contacted a psychologist and we met for the first time last week and I could tell she wasn't going to be able to help me. How could you tell after only one session? Therapy is hard work and can take some time. Can you try to open the door to the potential for healing? Ernold, if you are in any danger, please take steps to ensure your safety. Call your therapist if you need to.I feel so stupid for putting up with all this shit for so long' date=' and for what? Nothing![/quote']Things can change, Ernold. I'm sorry you are feeling so upset. We are here to support you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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