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I want to die


WhydoIhavetobethisway
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Mainly because I am a pedophile. I have never offended. Still I feel like most people think I will sooner or later. That is what most people think of a pedophile. I known about these feelings sense I was a kid when liking other boys. I still do today. My AOA is 11 to 14. Wish I could be myself. No that does not mean actually going out on dates with boys or anything like that. I just wish I could hang out with boys because I know I will never do anything. Never have. I guess I am doomed to die.

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  • 1 year later...

In my opinion, if you know you'll never do anything with young boys, then you don't need to be afraid of hanging out with them. The more you fear hanging around children, the more these feelings will grow. The brain seems to be funny like that. The more you try not to think about something, the more you'll think of it. You need to trust yourself. That being said, if you feel like you might do something, then don't put yourself in those situations.

I don't think you can have a healthy sexual relationship as an adult with someone of that age range, it's ultimately harmful to them. But, due to the fact that you've never offended, I have a feeling that you know that. I'm not sure why people are attracted to certain things, but maybe you can try not to nurture this attraction? ie. don't masterbate over it or fantasize over it, try to become part of an adult relationship (if you're not already in one), don't fight the thoughts instead acknowledge the thoughts when they're there but don't dwell on them and move on, & seek out therapy

I think if you recognize that 1) this is a harmful attraction to have and 2) you don't want to harm others; then you don't need to worry about it. Let those thoughts be there, but don't act on them. Laugh at them. Because you are capable of living a good life filled with healthy relationships and these are just thoughts. I'm sorry you're going through this, but you need to stay strong. No one can control their thoughts, but you can always control how you react to them. Let those thoughts come and go, but never act on them. You haven't acted on them this long, I bet you can live the rest of your life without acting on them either. And, why doom yourself to die over thoughts you can't control? If anything, be proud of yourself for never acting on them.

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  • 4 weeks later...

In my opinion, if you know you'll never do anything with young boys, then you don't need to be afraid of hanging out with them. The more you fear hanging around children, the more these feelings will grow. The brain seems to be funny like that. The more you try not to think about something, the more you'll think of it. You need to trust yourself. That being said, if you feel like you might do something, then don't put yourself in those situations.

I don't think you can have a healthy sexual relationship as an adult with someone of that age range, it's ultimately harmful to them. But, due to the fact that you've never offended, I have a feeling that you know that. I'm not sure why people are attracted to certain things, but maybe you can try not to nurture this attraction? ie. don't masterbate over it or fantasize over it, try to become part of an adult relationship (if you're not already in one), don't fight the thoughts instead acknowledge the thoughts when they're there but don't dwell on them and move on, & seek out therapy

I think if you recognize that 1) this is a harmful attraction to have and 2) you don't want to harm others; then you don't need to worry about it. Let those thoughts be there, but don't act on them. Laugh at them. Because you are capable of living a good life filled with healthy relationships and these are just thoughts. I'm sorry you're going through this, but you need to stay strong. No one can control their thoughts, but you can always control how you react to them. Let those thoughts come and go, but never act on them. You haven't acted on them this long, I bet you can live the rest of your life without acting on them either. And, why doom yourself to die over thoughts you can't control? If anything, be proud of yourself for never acting on them.

Thanks. That helps some.

I still feel the same way though. I can't help it.

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