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I think I will forever be stuck in the "SPS Cycle"


DatDude90
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I find myself in an ongoing cycle that has me going from, "You know what, I think I am a decent size" or "F*ck it, who cares if I'm too small, I'm going to get my rocks off no matter what". I then end up Google searching, "Is x inches too small?" And I read a couple posts on a website of a woman saying my size is too small, or a guy saying something along the lines of "If you're not at least this big, you're in for it, because from what I've heard, that's way too small" and then I'm back to rock bottom. The worst part is, searching online for the approval of my size by others has become a habbit.

Does anyone else go through something similar to this?

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I find myself in an ongoing cycle that has me going from, "You know what, I think I am a decent size" or "F*ck it, who cares if I'm too small, I'm going to get my rocks off no matter what". I then end up Google searching, "Is x inches too small?" And I read a couple posts on a website of a woman saying my size is too small, or a guy saying something along the lines of "If you're not at least this big, you're in for it, because from what I've heard, that's way too small" and then I'm back to rock bottom. The worst part is, searching online for the approval of my size by others has become a habbit.

Does anyone else go through something similar to this?

all the time. even in the course of 2 minutes of looking at my erection, i can go from thinking "eh, from this angle it doesnt look THAT small", to thinking "holy shit its the tiniest thing ever"

but ya too much google searching for validation makes it worse. but its like looking at a car wreck. you slow down to look for the blood and guts. do you really want to see that? yes. but no. but of course. not

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I do the exact same thing. I'm sure the reason why we do it is complex and multi-faceted. Perhaps it's a form of self-punishment. Or that we're used to, and more comfortable with, being the victim of a small penis rather than accepting it and moving on. It's kind of like we are saving ourselves from the rejection that we are afraid of. When you start to feel confident, your subconscious fear kicks in and you go surfing the web for reasons to go back to what is normal and comfortable for you.....self-loathing.

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I do the exact same thing. I'm sure the reason why we do it is complex and multi-faceted. Perhaps it's a form of self-punishment. Or that we're used to, and more comfortable with, being the victim of a small penis rather than accepting it and moving on. It's kind of like we are saving ourselves from the rejection that we are afraid of. When you start to feel confident, your subconscious fear kicks in and you go surfing the web for reasons to go back to what is normal and comfortable for you.....self-loathing.

sometimes though, it could be genuine seeking of validation.

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That's true. Personally speaking though, there is nothing on the internet about this issue that I haven't searched already. I have all the validation I need. I think we all do, don't we? Isn't that what brought us here? Yet I continue to do exactly as Robert said, and search the internet for the same answers I've already gotten. It's almost like I need the comfort of being miserable.

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i started to hunt for validation years back …. now I search knowing Im not going to find it … yet I do it anyway…. I guess it must be masochistic to an extent…

on the other hand there are some clips and articles I avoid like the plague because they are so awful it makes me suicidal

I have never shared them on here….

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That's true. Personally speaking though, there is nothing on the internet about this issue that I haven't searched already. I have all the validation I need. I think we all do, don't we? Isn't that what brought us here? Yet I continue to do exactly as Robert said, and search the internet for the same answers I've already gotten. It's almost like I need the comfort of being miserable.

Like you, there's nothing about it I haven't already searched for and read about. But I do it anyway, its as if I want to feel insecure and sexually inadequate.

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"... its as if I want to feel insecure and sexually inadequate."

Noticing this about yourself could be of some use in fighting it, though, Robert. To me, this is the part of the problem that shades into the realm of mental health. How we view ourselves is pretty vital, after all. The guys who feel inadequate over their size also often report feeling inferior in completely nonsexual situations, like in the office. Places where no one knows their size ... except of course the guy himself.

The looping thoughts, too, are sometimes a sign of obsessional thinking. The inability not to think about something can be very debilitating, no matter what it is.

A therapist might be able to help with some these patterns, if you were willing.

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