Hi... In reading your post I felt that you were also goading her on by being stoic, knowing this would anger her and make her crazy. Perhaps you are both being agressive towards each other, even though your approach is more passive. She obviously wants to hear that you still love her and want to be married to her but you can't tell her that because you may not want to be. So how come you are not really discussing these deep issues together? Are you at the point where you just want to leave her but are waiting for her to kick you out?

Let me start, if I may, by asking if you're familiar with the entire backstory of our situation. If any part of the discussion isn't exactly what she wants to hear, I might as well be waving a red cape in front of a 2500 pound bull, with my feet in 6 inches of concrete. If I don't get it physically, she'll just lay on the guilt extra thick, despite telling me to man up and tell her what's really on my mind.

The stoicism, as bad of a defense as it is, is my only option to avoid the worst of her retaliations. If I just ride out the prying, she gives up. On a good day, she doesn't hit or shove me. So in response to your question, there is no discussing anything with her. Maybe it's my fault for being her "yes man" for as long as I have.

And yes, I've wanted to leave since the day after I came back. I'm always going to love her I suppose, but her controlling and her temper, have sapped all desire to remain in a relationship with her dry.