She sounds really great and I think the idea about writting it all down is really the best you can do . I'm a type of person who deals with "everything" by writing about it and my therapist is so great that he always reads it.

Congrats to this new therapist and good luck with your healing process!!!

L.

Hi Lala3, Thanks for your post. The therapist seems to want to know everything about my personal life. She wants to know specific events, sexual orientation and details of the intimacy process which slightly puts me on my guard. I mean what use is it answering such questions now that I am divorced. What do you think? I'm confused as hell!

I see that it can be confusing. But "the way out" is to talk about that confusion with the therapist. I think she should clarify you her reasons for the questions. My opinion is that she just wants to understand you the best she can, so she needs to know "everything". (In the beginning of my therapy, I asked my therapist "What should I be talking about? What is important?" And he replied: "I don't know what is important. Just talk about anything that occurs to you." It seemed a bit strange for me that "he doesn't know what's important", but after some time I understood it completely. The "important" things "emerge" slowly, often from where you wouldn't expect them...) She also wants to help you to understand better your own needs.

But if you feel that some topics are too uncomfortable, don't forget you have the right to say it and not to answer. The reasons of avoiding certain topics can be very relevant for therapy, too. But now it's just the beginning, so... don't focus too much on this (what I've written in the previous sentence) and just... let her to know you to the extend that feels right to you now. The time often brings many changes in the therapeutic relationship - I, for example, had some issues in the beginning which I didn't want to mention at all, but after half a year, they became one of the main topics of the sessions...

Thanks for your thoughts and for adding me as a friend Lala03. Right now I dont feel comfortable meeting the therapist for sometime. She asked me to write a letter to my ex without posting it and reading it out to her, which I did. She wants me to write a letter about my entire life now starting from my childhood and adolescence. I had an excellent childhood but get a feeling of being exposed and very uncomfortable after already writing and reading out so much to her. Plus she keeps copies of whatever I write and files them. Maybe its her profession but I don't feel comfortable with it. Maybe because my ex was a doctor and shes a doctor too. I dont feel safe doing all this. Am I wrong in my thinking ?

Right now I just want to move on with my life and work in a good job. I had so much happening for me on the career front but now I get major palpitations with the thought of working or anyone finding out I'm divorced. What do I do?