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Panic! not at the disco


Ralph

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Had another panic attack tonight. Seems to be related to too much drinking. I had 8 last night. The first one was following a night long vodka binge and the second one was following 7 drinks after three nights in a row of 4-5 hours sleep. I thought the sleep deprivation and dehydration were the problem but it seems to be too much booze.

Fuck this, I'm going to see a doctor. No insurance but hopefully urgent care will be okay. Don't know what to do though if doc/RN says he can't help me. I really, really, hate these episodes because every time it feels like I'm going to die. Literally. Then my survival instinct comes in and says nooooo I don't wanna die oh no no no no. I pop some benzos that were prescribed to me and I feel a little better when they kick in but still a little worse for wear. Well, here's hoping that I will have some good news to report from urgent care clinic tomorrow.

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I'm okay for now (knock on wood) but I'm going with the ounce of prevention better than a pound of cure approach. I realize I joked about ending up in the hospital before but that was just a joke... if I really do end up there I'm going to be chagrined. Be careful what you wish for and all that.

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Yeah I went first thing this morning. I had chest pain last night so I was going in thinking I had a heart problem. They turned around and said it was a panic attack. My heart seems to be fine. Intuition 1; Analysis 0. Walked out with scripts for Ambien (to get me off the seroquel) and xanax to handle the panic attacks.

I still feel this lingering rawness from last night like anything that would normally make me slightly nervous has me jumping out of my skin. Off to the gym to see if that will help.

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