In an effort to make some changes, I have been searching high and low for things I can do to help myself. On the net and in books and reflecting and all that. When people write about 'dependent personality disorder', most of the time it's about symptoms and not much else. Cognitive Therapy is mentioned, which is basically relearning a set of skills [..] but they may not go in details on this, of course. So for the people who want to take it into their own hands [shockingly] to improve their quality of life, it's a little harder to find stuff to actually define a course of action.

so I have come down with a list of things to work on...No I have to undertand what this all means,for me, and come up with a plan with my therapist, and also check if I am heading in the right direction. But anyway, here it is.

1] assertive skill [curbing passive agressive behaviors]

2] building boundaries

3] examining values

5] examining beliefs about self, building self-esteem, self love, dignity

6] Learning optimism , get rid of helpless feelings, and unrealistic fears

7] assessing dream s, planning, following thru

8] establishing discipline, pleasure delaying

9] descision making

10] taking care of physical health and appearance

11] responsability

12] rest, fun

13] belonging, friends

14] taking care of day to day [bills, etc]

15] household

16] people skills, negociting, conflicts solving

17] letting go, forgiveness, curbing perfectionism

18] obsessions in check, manipulation in check

there you go...more to come