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when was it.



the last time I was truly me?

When I was two, I think. My mom told me I was a happy child. One time, when we moved to this new town, and on a new street. She said, the first thing I did is open up the door, run to the front of the porch, and shout: "Frrriiiiiiiieeennnnd, where are youuuuuu?"

I think that was the true me. A child who was very friendly and outgoing.

She said when we were at the store, she would sit me in the baby place, in the shopping cart, and roll me around as she was shopping and I would be all smiles, talking to people: 'hello? how are you?' I would say.

Or I would climb around. Onto everything. And pretty high too. That would take about a second and a half she said. She said I was a tiring kid to look after for that matter, because I was very active and not afraid of much. She couldn't get me down because she was scared of heights. She would just stand on the ground and say as gently and invitingly as possible 'now, can you climb down for me please? I know it's fun but mom it's better to stay on the ground ok?'

Moments of happiness, joy, and true colour?

Running in the fields around the house with my little brother.

When I was about 16. Going shopping with my forever best friends J and Isa, and pretending we were German. Laughing and laughing.

Going on this super long bike trip for a weekend with Chris and G. Exploring the mountains north of where I lived. when I was 17.

Going on this climbing trip across the states with D. I guess I never came back! when I was 23.

Taking up telemarking, when I was 24. I just love skiing and never had the chance to truly give it my whole until then! I skiied everyday almost. For two winters. I loved it.

Going ski touring and climbing with my friends H and P and S. Almost every weekend. Those were truly the days! So much fun. Working the body hard, but with such good friends who never pushed. They were really good climbers. Al of them, and good skiers, but it was all about fun and friendship with them....then coming back home exhausted and having a BBQ and a beer. That was the life! That's when I was 24 to 29.

Deciding to learn graphic design. Mixed moments, as I was scared and felt a lot of anxiety. But I was so glad I did all this research, got myself into a school again. Got a little job as a designer... when I was 27.

Going on the hotspring finding mission with M. All the way down to San Fran. We had a lot of good moments. when I was 29.



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