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how am I doing?



Well, since you've asked Malign...

I am doing well all in all. Not too high not low. Just good. It seems.

Went on a lil trip with my girl friend. that was good for the most part. I mean, I had to listen to a lot of her relationship problems. And how she loves her bf, which I still think is a 'douche'.

I had a few bouts of anxiety. From feeling like I am not doing what I should. Which is actively look for a job I can do with the arm in a sling.

And I thought a whole lot more than I wish I had about this new guy I am dating... Waiting to see if he would text me... And trying not to text him. Which felt like a bit of a game but, really it shouldn't. I truly felt like it's way too much to text a guy on a trip like a teen.

I tried to invite him to go to the lake tonight but he turn me down. Which is totally fine. But in my head, I was trying hard to see the light and not feel like I was being rejected. As I wasn't. I mean he has his things he still wants to do. I have my things. And I wasn't being rejected as he texted me again saying he would like to see me over the weekend. It's just hard with me doing nothing all day, or almost nothing. and then feeling like I am waiting for my master to come home, all anxious. Crazy. And I know it's not the way to go. So I talk myself on keeping with the plan. Making sure it's not all about when I will see him... So, if he doens't call back in time for saturday for a date, I will take something on. The way I see it, is well, I wouldn't wait around for a friend like that. So I wont for him either.

I will just say, sorry but you didnt call me back so I made some other plans...See you next time.

Hard, but hey. got to do what you have to do.

that's my little life for now.


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