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I hate my life


tarun829

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I feel like shit today. I feel lonely. well, I am lonely. I hate to be lonely. I wish I had someone to talk to. If I had only one friend it would made so much difference. I see people on facebook having even 500 friends, and here I am, I dont even have one person to talk to.

I hate my life- this was a line I would repeat to myself a lot a few years back. Now this line has become kind of an understatement.

I wish I had a better childhood. I had such a horrible childhood. I was lonely, and I was bored to death. I even went into childhood depression because of the boredom. I had some time back read an article which mentioned this research which says that childhood depression can start from as early as 3. I actually wanted to know about this very fact, because I did know I had this depression, only I didnt know when it started.

Well it didnt come as a surprise. I dont have any memory of a happy childhood. I even have memories from the age of 3. But at the same time I dont have any happy memories. I hated late evenings then, I hate late evenings now. I just find the twilight period so gray, dull, depressing, gloomy. I wish I had a friend whose hand I could hold to get through this time. I would love that friend so much. But I am 27 and I dont even have a friend. All I meet are a******s.

I hate being alone. I have been alone my whole life. But I am still not used to it. I crave for company.

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I'm so sorry you have had such a depressing life. I couldn't imagine!! I don't know your history or have expereinced your life but what I can say that even at 27 your life is "young" and it can change.....

I'm sure people have suggested you get involved in groups of your interest. Church, support groups, work, a hobby whatever.... There must be some type of mindful acceptance of the here and now... yes you had a depressing crappy life but finding a group which will lead to a common interest to friends and aquaintences is what might help.....

Here is a <<>> and I hope you can find it in you to be happy....:)

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