I got this from a personal coaching website.
Habits are automated to a certain extent. they are things we do mostly without thinking.
There's a whole lot of 'bad habits' we know of in ourselves. Sometimes we'd like to do 'good things' but we just don't...
It does take some effort. But one thing is clear, defining what we really want, and simplifying our list to the 'essential' things that we would like to change is the best way to change.
There are many things we'd like to change, of course. But if we can simplify this list, it is way less overwhelming. We find out what we truly want [these are essentially goals] and WHY, then establish the HOW am I going to do this.
The HOWs is basically taking into account what is the reality right now in our life. For example, if we have a mental health issue, we must take it into account: how is this going to play into achieving my 'want'?
Personally, I deal with general anxiety, and dysthymia. I have dealt with this the major part of my life. I know how it affect my life. For instance, I tend to get extremely stressed out, I tend to beat myself up a lot when I make a mistake or discouraged a lot when I don't do 'what I have to do'. I constantly think of what I have done wrong and their consequences... [this i the anxiety part]... and this puts me down a lot...[dysthymia] where, I often lack energy to do anything, I beat myself up, I look down on myself, I feel lonely a lot, etc...
But my 'goals' [below] are the tasks AND a bit of the solution to my problems above.
So I put out my virtual pen and paper.
WHAT DO I TRULY WANT? WHY?
1] be smoke free [the crucial one]
-will enable me to be with people I want to be more
-have better health/not sick
-lower my anxiety because I will now 'do the right thing'
-help me exercise
-be with people I want to be with
3] loose 20 lb [get back to my original weight, the one that is a reasonable BMI, and fairly easy to maintain for me]
-feel better about self + more confortable
-prevent health problems
-feel more confident
Developing new habits:
Developing new habits might be easier than you think. Here’s how:
1. First, pick a habit to establish.
2. What would be the smallest action you could take to get started? (For example, you could simply put on your running shoes.) Commit to doing this one small thing on a regular basis, ideally on a schedule.
-set a date [today!!!!] I have set it a month ago, now is the day
-get rid of reminders
3. Set up a reminder to help you remember your commitment. (For example, put a note in your calendar.)
-I go to a website and pledge everyday
-I got a list of whys
4. When you feel ready, gradually increase your commitment – but no more than you can consistently do. Just be sure to make small changes over time; sudden or drastic changes rarely stick.
-if I really feel the need, I can use nicorette
-I know how long it's going to take to get rid of the most difficult pangs: 21day I give myself
-21 days to stick it out! I can do it!
5. Share your commitment with someone. Accountability really helps.
6. Identify the personal values you are honouring with your action. (For example, if you value health and self-care, recognize that exercise is supporting something that’s important to you.)
-my list of benefits and reasons
7. Notice how good you feel when you follow a healthy habit; give yourself kudos for taking this positive step.
-little reward with the money I save from being smoke free [lots!] -> clothes, new haircut, restaurant, book,
8. Stick with your new habit for at least 30 days. Before long, this behaviour will feel automatic and you won’t have to think about it anymore.
9. If you do slip, don’t give up – just try again the next day!