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im new and scared....help!!


sandyh86
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hello everyone! i have been struggling with anxiety for along time now but i am especially going through it really bad now...;) i just cant seem to let these thoughts go i have horrible feeling that i did something really bad when i was about 13 and am now 22. i heard recently that we are able to block things out and completely forget about terrible things that were done to us, but is it possible to forget something we have done i mean something really bad and gross i cant evan say it but i have never had this kinda of thought before until really i heard about repressed memories and now i have very groosome images in my head that wont go away but at the same time i just know i couldnt do the that im thinking.is it possible to talk yourself into a thought that never happen??? im really scared that im going to start believing these thoughts and i dont think i could live with myself i did. i have also started taking zoloft about one week ago do you think it will help with thoughts? if anyone can help i would really appreciate it.

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Guest ASchwartz

Hi Sandyh86,

I want to welcome you to our community where I hope you will find lots of friends and support.

As far as Zoloft is concerned, the answer is Yes, it can help relieve depression and those obsessional kinds of thoughts that intrude themsleves, just like you are having.

I do not know what you think you did when you were 13 years old but, I suspect, it is a lot less serious than you think it is. Besides, you were only 13 and, come on, give yourself a break, what 13 year older has not done some pretty dumb things? I seems as though you are hard on yourself.

Can you tell us more about yourself? Are you in psychotherapy along with taking Zoloft? Do you live home, single, married, what was growing up like for you, etc? Whatever you feel like answering.

Again, welcome ;)

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well i have had anxiety for as long as i can remember and obessive thoughts that i just cant seem to control. like with this one,one minute i will be like there is no way i could have done something like that than the next min my mind is telling me what if?? and the images are so clear down to were i was thats whats so scary its like my mind finds the scaryest thing it can possibley imagine and then when i seem to be getting over that thought another more scary thought comes in. its so tiring!! now alittle about myself i am married and he is wonerful to me although he doesnt really understand my anxiety and how i let myself get so low/scared i have never been to a therapist i thought about before but its just way to expensive. i talk to my husband and mom alot they are great support and have been. i have had all kinds of worrys from ppl dying,disease becoming a bad person molester/killer but nothing like this the past i mean i just try so hard to remember but cant fully i just want to stop thinking about this and move on with my life. do you think i will ever get over this or that my worry will turn into crazy and i wll start believing these thoughts becouse i know if i did i would go crazy. thank you for listening.... please right back

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  • 3 weeks later...

Sandy, it looks like you have already received some good advice. I think if you want lasting relief you would be well served to give cbt a try. I was in a cbt group that was lead by one of the brilliant Michelle Carske's (whose podcast can be listened to hear on this site) former students who raved about her. Craske wrote the foreword to the book Been there, Done that? DO THIS! by Sam Obitz that we used in my group and it was awesome! The exercise called the TEA form has been a lifesaver for me and they enable you to change the way you process your thoughts and stop obsessing over everything. Cbt is really helpful if you are determined to do the exercises and extremely effective too:)

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Guest ASchwartz

Cynthia, great suggestion. :)

Sandy, I hope you listen to the podcast and follow through. Also, there really is low cost therapy available. You just have to look for it.

Allan

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Cynthia, great suggestion. :o

Sandy, I hope you listen to the podcast and follow through. Also, there really is low cost therapy available. You just have to look for it.

Allan

Thanks Allan:)

Sandy I hope you saw our notes here and are giving cbt a try. Like we already said if you work it, it will help you feel a lot better. Let me know if you have any questions or need more encouragement.

Edited by Cynthia
only put one L in Allan's name.
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Sandy give cbt a try. I just finished and it has helped me change my thinking and even though I am finished I still counter my thoughts daily in a tea form and I feel like I am continuing to grow and build new pathways in my brain that enhance my life and keep the anxiety away.

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Guest ASchwartz

Sandy,

I am wondering about the same thing as Cynthia. By the way, Cyntha, I am glad to see that you are around with us.

Anyway, Sandy, I want to encourage you to take the good advice that Cynthia and others have given and to add one more thing: Meditation.

Sandy, what do you believe that you did as a child that could have been so very bad?

Allan :confused:

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I agree but you have to keep working on your thoughts and countering them in your TEA forms to reinforce them and make them permanent in you.

No doubt you are correct Cynthia. I see a big difference and a diminishing need to do them as often as the new ways they are teaching me to think are helping before I even have to do my TEA forms now:)

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Sandy,

I am wondering about the same thing as Cynthia. By the way, Cyntha, I am glad to see that you are around with us.

Anyway, Sandy, I want to encourage you to take the good advice that Cynthia and others have given and to add one more thing: Meditation.

Sandy, what do you believe that you did as a child that could have been so very bad?

Allan :confused:

Thanks Alan:)

Too bad Sandy has not returned. I am sure whatever it is she thought was so very bad is completely blown out of proportion in her head and just needs to be exposed to the light of day. Hope she eventually returns.

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Right now I spend about 15-minutes a day on them and whenever situations that arise a little extra but I hope lower the amount of time in the future as I get better at them and they become more normal way of thinking for me. How long does that usually take?

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CBT is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. It focuses on identifying the client's negative thoughts and substituting a more realistic, more positive thought. It's shown good results with depression and self-esteem issues, among other things. A TEA form is an acronym for the processing of one of these negative thoughts, but I've momentarily lost what exactly it stands for.

I'm trying to find more complete information onsite, but the silly thing won't let me search for 3-letter words ... I know that there are links buried in both Cynthia and tmay's posts, though.

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TEA = Thought Error Analysis.

It can be done with or without a therapist. It's nice if you have someone to guide you, but not essential. You can do it online too, try moodgym.com. Or you can do it with a book - if you look at this site's main page, I'm sure you'll find references to CBT resources and the titles of the books.

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There's a thread under the Psychotherapy forum called "CBT w/o a Dr.?" that discusses that question. Although the original poster withdrew her specific question, there's quite a number of viewpoints in there, and a few books mentioned. As I understand it, CBT is often taught by a therapist in a relatively small number of sessions, then practiced by the client on their own, after that. But, a dedicated person could probably teach themselves. The hard part is spotting our own faulty thinking, such as all-or-nothing patterns ("It's never going to get better ...").

Between them, they have a lot of posts ... I'll keep looking, for you.

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Thank you Luna, thank you Malign. I have written down the link moodgym.com and will try it out. I don't know about being dedicated though. I see myself as being very weak when it comes to doing things to help myself. If there are any other online links that anyone can think of though it would be a start since any books mentioned probably won't be available here anyway. Thanks again.

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