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Here is my story.


FallenFaith
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Hello,

I am turning 31 in a month and wanted to reflect upon my life. I am 6ft 5.5 and have SPS. I have not measured it because I am too scared to know the official numbers. I am a virgin and have never been naked in front of anyone. I have never dated a girl either. My friends always joke about how I would "destroy" a girl because I am such a big guy but now I am being called gay as they have never seen me with a girl. People every where assume I will be well hung and every time they make the joke a small part of me dies inside.

I am living an aimless life without hope or enjoyment. I have not even hugged anyone in over 15 years, friends, relatives etc as I feel I am "cursed". Suicide seems like a pleasing thought and ultimate freedom. Have given up wanting to feel the warmth of a caring woman or have children :(

Just wanted to let this out :(

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Is the 5.5 penis size or are you 6ft 5 and a half? I'm just asking to make sure as you said you didn't measure. It's shit you're feeling like this, it's a hard thing to deal with for sure. But you're in good company here. There isn't a guy in here who doesn't know what you're going through, it's a living nightmare sometimes. But it's good you're reaching out, hopefully you can speak to some guys who can help or sympathise with how you're feeling. I know the gay thing all too well, I think a lot of guys with SPS are wrongly suspected as being gay, but one silver lining is it stops the constant questions. Unfortunately most people are ignorant about SPS and it never crosses their mind that that might be the issue. Anyway, welcome to the forum. 

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Hello, thank you for the replies. Sorry I was a bit emotional writing this so the passage was not coherent. My height is 6ft 5.5". And for being such a huge guy and having SPS is crushing. I am going through the threads and seeing a lot of people are afflicted with the same issue. It is good to know there is a base to discuss this matter with others. 

I am a huge UFC fan and have always wanted to take up the sport. Unfortunately a large part of it is grappling and I am too scared during the sessions when you are mounted your training partner will be able to "feel" or rather - not feel your small issue :(

It really does reduce the quality of life for a man.  What does NBP mean?

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I know my world officially ended once I measured. At the underwhelming size of just 11cm (4.2 inches) I couldn't believe it. The numbers on the tape must be wrong. What kind of measuring tape is this anyway? Can't be. I measured over and over and over again until it dawned on me. I have a small dick. I can't begin to tell you how much that bit of information fucked me up and I wasn't even sexually active at that point. I don't recall where i got the idea from but i figured if i lost weight my monster would grow. By how much? I didn't care. Anything is better than 11 fucking centimetres, so I got to work.

 

During the process I obsessively measured. Every single night I'd go to the bathroom and measure and every night I'd be dissapointed. Eventually at my lightest weight of 87kg,  another tonn if bricks hit me hard. That shit won't grow no matter what you do. Unbearable mental anguish insued. I hated life and myself. I also started checking men's bulges out (and honestly I still do to this day just not as obsessively as I used to) and started visiting the smalldickproblems subreddit. Ultimately that shit fucked me up good.

 

How's my life today at 31? Well all the bitterness and anger has left me rather dead inside. My first thoughts upon touching it to rub one out are about the size of it. It fucking pisses me off, but sometimes I laugh at how pathetic it feels. I still think about what I'm missing out on but the feelings aren't as intense as they once were, one user CNL describes this feeling a heck of a lot better than I ever could in a thread on here. I did seek the the services of an escort just to get it out of the way but the experience was so bad that I'm in no rush to do it again. Basically my sex life died before it even began.

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  Welcome to the other fallen.

I am a tall guy too 193 cm (6,3 inches I think), and 35 years old......

I try to convince myself that she is out there..... It will take a lot of humiliations before you find her.
Meaning that some women will laugh at you, dump you, put you through misery after or even before you sleep with them.....but there is nothing you can do about it.

Stay away from girls within your friend circles.

I wish you all the best...

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Heart breaking stories.

Best advice I have read, to keep away from known girls. I have been thinking about taking taking steroids to become big and tanky to "feel" better about myself - more of a man.

Has anyone felt this way or tried it? I mean when suicidal thoughts creep in to your daily life I guess it is OK to try anything to make you feel better, right?

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12 hours ago, TheDane said:

It's funny because it's been an issue for the 15+ women i've been with......

That is a large number to feel affected by size. I guess statistics speak louder than when women who try to be nice and say it doesn't matter. I actually got with my childhood sweetheart about 8 years ago, it was all great and before anything got too serious I broke up, scared what she will think when she finally finds out. To make it easier for her I started to act like a complete moron, not wanting her to think it was her fault - in effect driving her away. It was so painful when I was doing this but I knew it was for the best. 

 

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Fallen,

I'm a little older than you and have been around the block a few times.  I'm not going to lie and tell you that every encounter you have with a woman is going to be an awesome one but who knows, they may very well be. I will tell you that height trumps penis size all day long for most women. Do yourself a favor and do an internet search at what women look for in a man and you will  not find one study that will place a dick preference over height. Woman just don't care about dick size as much as we guys do and they tend to place dick size very low on chart.

Height and muscles is everything and if you have both, you have no worries.  If you're dick is below 4", then maybe you might want to consult a doctor to see what could be done because my advice above will be misguided. If you are over 4", then get the fuck out there and start dating already and I will guarantee you the first girl you have sex with will be coming back for more. trust me on this one. The average is 5", so if you're 4", then you're not far off from average.

 

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10 hours ago, FallenFaith said:

That is a large number to feel affected by size. I guess statistics speak louder than when women who try to be nice and say it doesn't matter. I actually got with my childhood sweetheart about 8 years ago, it was all great and before anything got too serious I broke up, scared what she will think when she finally finds out. To make it easier for her I started to act like a complete moron, not wanting her to think it was her fault - in effect driving her away. It was so painful when I was doing this but I knew it was for the best. 

  

Dont worry about it.... we all have stories like that. But you have to get yourself out there. If you are scared that you cant perform get some Viagra.... But you have to get yourself out there. if your penis is hard like a rock it will come a long way....girls dig that

 

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