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What is going on?


Calla

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I've post this here because I'm not sure what is going on. Is it possible to have a mild version of bipolar?

Today was a classic day of how I am when things are really bad. Woke up and for a few moments thought...I'm ok. Then burst into tears. Sobbed for ages. Then suddenly was overwhelmed with this feeling of peace and comfort. This lasted a few mins and then I cried again.

The mornings are always worse...which I think is classic symptom with depression. But my brain doesn't even have a chance to really process what is going on or if I feel ok before I just cry.

I try and relish the moments of serenity but they don't last as long as the bad moments. Is this just a mood swinging thing? Sorry if this doesnt sound anywhere near as bad as what other people go through.

My cousin has bipolar so there is family history.

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Do you know why it is worse in the morning? Is it a hormonal build up thing? Do you feel like you spend the whole day "putting yourself right" and then just as you get there it time for bed.

I'm so scared of my doctor. I really don't want to take meds to be honest. But thats just a deep routed thing from childhood.

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