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My dick is causing problems.


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Around 2 months ago I broke up with my girlfriend of 3 months. We didn't have sex and we were actually working out quiet well together. She had mentioned wanting to bring our relationship to the next level and I just couldn't bare the overwhellming fact that I was too small. I made excuse after excuse and couldn't take it anymore. I broke up with her only to regret it. I haven't tolder her I'm small and she doesn't know that I really wanna be with her. Last time I had sex with my previous girlfriend she end up not wanting to be with me. I'm not skilled in the art of love making and I just don't want to lose her for good. I'm tired of jerking off, I want a normal relationship, what do I do?

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If you try to open up to her, you might lose her.

If you don't try, you've already lost her.

You might feel that if you tried and lost, it would hurt more than losing her by not trying. You would have to decide if it would, and if so, how much.

Then your only remaining task is deciding whether what you feel for her is worth the risk to you.

One thought is that if she loves you, this won't be an issue.

Of course, another is that if you loved you, it wouldn't be an issue, at least as much.

I never did go to Dear Abby school ...

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It looks like you simply tried to protect yourself/ your feelings by breaking up with her. You automatically assumed that she will leave you once the two of you become intimate. So, to avoid the pain, and to defend yourself, YOU ended the relationship.

The only problem I see is that you did not really give this relationship a chance.

I have done this in the past once (ended a relationship to "protect my feelings" ) and still regret it.

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Just thinking about this a bit more...

If you have been dating for 3 months she may already have known your size... ie she may have felt you when you were kissing or making out etc.

Also you may not be quite as small as you think (some studies put the average caucasian range at 5.5-6.2)

Also not knowing your age its difficult to give further advice.

Also are you both part of the same circle of friends? Stll at school? At work?

If there are no over-arching mutual connections between you both then I say give it a shot.

I did exactly this last year and whilst it was painful when it didnt work out, I am over it mostly and there have been no other consequences.

If however you are very young and/or have lots of mutual friends you need to tread more carefully- but not all women blab or are insensitive- you have to make a judgment call about her character there.

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I'm 19 and we both go to the same college. We hang with the same group of friends and I've only known her for half a year so no family ties. I'm just so afraid of the rejection. As for her knowing my size I don't think she knows I kept my distance. As for size I'm around 2 inches and 4 hard. I had bad sexual experiences and its keeping me from enjoying what I had. I know I was being selfish but I might try and get with her again, just hope I can go through with it.

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Oh I see. well you are probably wise to be a little cautious if you have lots of mutual friends.

I wouldnt call yourself selfish- you were just anxious about her reaction thats all- perfectly understandable.

If you were with her for 3 months she sounds like she wasnt a 'fast girl'. She may be understanding and accepting.

Only you can make the call about whether she would tell a close friend, who tells another friend, who tells another etc.

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Yes she is a very respectable women and I don't think she'd tell anyone. But the problem is when we talk about sex, it gets so awkward. I think she may get the idea that I'm not into her in that way and in reality I would love to be with her. Its just gana get to the point where I'm either enough or not, physicly.

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Then I would urge you to make the jump and ask her out again.

Dont mention your insecurities to her (I made the mistake of 'confessing' that against good advice on here not to and it didnt work too well)

Just kiss and be passionate as best you can.

If she can deal with it great, if not then at least you did your best.

If you have had a recent relationship with a decent girl, who likely still has feelings for you then thats a good situation- imagine how much harder it will be with someone you dont trust and is less decent or who you dont know so well?

I say grab the nettle and what will be will be. Good luck Michael.

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  • 8 months later...

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