It's too early to "move on"... It's a grief and every grief has to take its time. I admire you that you're so strong and can "go through the motions". Some people stop and can't do anything... I think this way you fight the depression. If you stopped, the depression would win. Don't let it win. Don't close the door to the future. Just grieve as long as you have to... I hope it will not last very long...

Thanks Lala.

I don't feel very strong, but my kids depend on me, I may have a Children's Aid Society investigating me again to ensure I am a fit parent. My kids really don't want to live with their mom. They can see her all they want with me, I am fairly certain she would not be so fair. I need to keep things above water.

The problem with grieving, is how do you grieve when it may not be dead?