One thing that depression can do is distort one's thoughts.

Misery is my new state of mind. Deal with it' date=' cope with it, adapt to it.

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It's true that you can't change the fact that your brother has passed away. You also can't change others who are addicted to drugs.

But...

You can feel better. This state of mind and your feeling so badly can change. I know it's hard to see right now, but things can improve.

Is there any way you can get some professional help through assistance?

I'm sorry you're hurting so badly, Jenna. I hope you will keep fighting and trying to heal.

I've been approved for Medicaid, I'm just waiting on the card to come. It should arrive any day now. I'll be calling Monday to make an appointment with my therapist since it takes a week or so to get in.

Acceptance is something I lack. I'd like to think I'm not denying the obvious things in life, but since I'm not accepting, I must be in denial.

I can't continue to beat myself up over those things which I cannot change. The sooner I learn to accept that, the better off I'll be.

In general, I agree with you, Jenna, and I'm glad to see you decided to find an acceptance (hopefully a right kind of it!), but in the one thing, IJ is right - you can get rid of the misery, of the bad feelings. Moreover, I don't agree with this:

I can't help other people, if I can't even help myself.

It might be true in some cases, but not in general. You can be helpful and provide lots of positives things to others, even when you can't help yourself at the moment.

Good luck with your therapy and healing!!!