practicing acceptance. No one understands. That's okay. Maybe things will go better next time around. Things go up and down like a wave. They repeat like a wave, too. Pattern and variation. Not sure how I'll feel tomorrow, oh well, might just practice acceptance on that too. Feels like I'm too sensitive, but the world will fall apart if I let anything go. Maybe this isn't the truth but I want to at least try to control everything. I still feel like the next beating is just around the corner. I've been walking on eggshells trying to keep fate from beating me. This is where the anxiety comes from, and I've let much of my life be overshadowed by this. Maybe it is possible to reclaim the present though.