My big question of the day - do I accept my Depression and work with the limitations it causes me, or do I continue to fight the Depression and strive to conquer it?
By continuing to fight the Depression and conquer it I feel I may actually be aiding it. I set very high expectations for myself and I feel as though I am continuously failing to meet them. When I was a young woman just learning about Depression I was feisty and invincible. My future was not decided, the road was clear for me to attain anything I set my mind to. I am 40 now and the natural aging process is setting in. I am not young, feisty, or invincible anymore and my road has run out of space. Maybe it is time to accept who I am at this moment and accept the limitations my Depression gives me. Time to work with the Depression and the limitations and move on instead of continuing to fight the Depression and conquer it.
But how do I tame the fighter who has fought long and hard and helped me reach the point i am at now? How do I tame the fighter that kept me going when all I wanted to do was quit? Do I need to tame the fighter at all? Maybe I just have to teach the fighter to work with the Depression instead of against it. But how do I do that? And do I have the strength to do that? I just don't know.