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Partial Continuation


malign

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Well, I know I left y'all hanging a little bit last time. That was partly because I didn't know very much more than what I wrote: decisions made in the past weren't standing up to the changes going on inside me.

I'm afraid that to some extent, your disappointment will have to continue, since a complete set of answers has not yet presented itself. ;-) In some sense, that's okay: I don't expect a full set of answers to life's questions until it's finally over. I would rather like to know what to do next, however. ;-)

And that's where I am. Mind swirling, pieces of ideas drifting by, feelings popping up and saying "feel me!" Some of the pieces are not particularly nice to me; in fear and ignorance, they can be fairly vicious. They think that that's the way to get their wishes, to keep me safely isolated. And I'm not listening any more. However, having been locked to their guidance for so long and then suddenly freed, my compass is still swinging fairly wildly, trying to imagine a new course. I have some basic ideas; "what I am" didn't really change. But I am having to relearn "what I want", and "what I'm willing to risk to get it". It's been a trip, no doubt, and it's just begun. :-)

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wow! well this couldn't be more clear! :( No, but seriously, It's good to asses your options carefully and feel the feelings that are there. Healthy really. Just have to make sure they don't lock you down 'safely isolated'... but propel you forward into the world... Towards what you want, yes.

I find myself pondering these days... keeping my mind on what I want as well...pondering as well if the risk is worth it....

Keep us posted

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Complete clarification leaves me with no mysteries left to intrigue you! :-) Nah, it's more complicated than that. Even this place is too public to be completely open about some things. But it's not a dark secret, and it's something to work towards. A good thing, in other words.

You take care of yourself, too, Miss Tour.

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Ya, I know, Is alll good. Clear as mud is sometimes a good thing, as long as it's clear to you. There are somethings I have kept to myself as well here, because I felt I could manage, and because well, just cuz ;)

I'm ok, I seem to take my heart for an emotional rollercoaster though these days. But yesterday I went for sushi with my roomy and he helped me keep on track...

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Best of luck Malign , with whatever decisions you make. You have a very good insight into others problems hopefully it can help with your own beliefs and thoughts.

Goose

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