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Plus ça change ...


malign

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You know, the worst days are when you think you're right on the brink of crossing over into another world, where there's bright sun and no fear, but then later that same day, you feel not only like nothing has changed, but that nothing ever will. It's worse when you know that in between, you personally haven't moved at all.

So yeah, it's all in my head. It's all in how I'm looking at things. But I don't seem to have any control over these disparate outlooks, to say, I need the hard-headed one now, but I'll need the caring one from time to time, and the content one at the end of the day. Instead I get a frightened one whenever something needs to get done, and the bitter cynic whenever I reflect back on my day. Most importantly, they seem to conspire to keep themselves in "power"; no one seems to think that any of the others might have a healthier approach than they do.

Hey, it's much like the meetings we have at work. ;-)

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I know what you mean, Sue.

But I recently had a very strong realization that the past is past. I've already flown through it, and I'll never get to go back. Now, and the near future, are the only places you can really focus your attention.

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