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What if it all happens at once?


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36 Years old, body's falling apart. Unable to work.

Past 3 years, tormented by neighbors who are loud, make us loose sleep, etc. Just fought a huge, long battle, borrowing, saving, searching. Just moved. We were told this place was ultra quiet. It's not. Again, woken from our sleep regularly, etc.

Girlfriend just fell last week on cement stairs. Tore lots of muscle in her back, bruised knees, damaged wrist and ankle. We joke about it but she's slower than me and I walk with a cane. Her recovery will be 6-8 weeks.

We are always rotating between fires. Sometimes we're starving. Sometimes I can't physically get out of bed due to illness. Our car hasn't run in over a year. Utilities constantly disconnected and reconnected. I'm constantly on the phone and in visits for help with meds, medical care, food, bills, etc. I'm constantly fighting physical pain, symptoms and medicinal side effects. And on top of it all we have no place to come home to to relax and heal.

Been in therapy, been working on stress relief, doing everything we can. It's not enough. We value our breaks and positives but there's no way to balance the stress when it's 90% of our time.

I'm a very positive, resourceful person but I'm out of ideas and this is going downhill fast.

Any suggestions would help.

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Hi Shawn. I'm not sure there are any solutions except riding the wave and doing the best you can with a tough situation. It sounds like your relationship is strong, so at least you have that!:) Do you have a social services advisor, someone who can help find alternative solutions you, whether it's lodging or something to eat....

I just read a wonderful book over the weekend, it's called Man's search for Meaning, by Victor Frankl, a survivor of nazi concentration camps. It beautifully eloquent in defining what make people get through very tough situations .... that might be a good book for you right now :-)

Hang in there!

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  • 2 weeks later...

Sorry to hear you are having such a rough time. As Symora says sometimes it's about getting through the now and coming out the other side. "This too shall pass" is a saying I find often useful.

Do you think you are getting all the help you are entitled to then?

And there is nothing worse than disturbed sleep, especially if you are in physical pain as it's the time the body heals the most. Is there anything you can do about that? A friendly chat with neighbours about noise. Even something as simple as ear plugs (I;m sure you've probably been through all these things)

And Symora, I have been waiting for that book to come back to my library, so it's great to hear a recommendation.

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