SweetSue Posted November 25, 2011 Report Posted November 25, 2011 yesterday - enough of yesterdays. but to those who took the time to help me - a sincere thankyou today.im back in hospital. i have to accept (somehow) that its where i need to be.stuff is eating its way through my body and mostly my mind. ive been doing shite to numb out an ignore it. have to try and find the courage to face it. its not easy.i broke myself. i have my reasons. its complicated.i need to tell the docs what is going on. i have to. im scared.how do i break the fear and manage to speak out? - the voices get so mad with me when i try to tell.
DarknessRules Posted November 25, 2011 Report Posted November 25, 2011 i ask myself that question many times. i have come up with few answers that didnt really work. but at that point i have been tryin to do it on my own. back then i had no one. i was alone fighting a battle that is too hard to fight on my own. now im not alone. and nether are you. i have learned that what works best is to draw strength from those who care about you and wish to help. it hasnt taken the problems away completely for me and for me they are still there and affect me in ways i would prefer they didnt. but it has helped me a bit. what i do is i borrow that strength from those who want to help me. focus on that (well the best thing i can describe it as is energy) that i get from them. a warm feeling. then i feel stronger and i try to do what i want to do or say what i want to say listening to the voices of my friends more then the voices in my head. it may not work for everyone but its worth a try right? i hope ive made seance in my description. and i hope it can help you.
Lana73 Posted November 25, 2011 Report Posted November 25, 2011 i have learned that what works best is to draw strength from those who care about you and wish to help. it hasnt taken the problems away completely for me and for me they are still there and affect me in ways i would prefer they didnt. but it has helped me a bit. what i do is i borrow that strength from those who want to help me. focus on that (well the best thing i can describe it as is energy) that i get from them. a warm feeling. then i feel stronger and i try to do what i want to do or say what i want to say listening to the voices of my friends more then the voices in my head. This is one of the best advices I have heard in a long time. I can't add anything more to it. Just wanted to say that reading this made me realize how incredibly lucky I am to have so many people in my life who care about me. Friends, family. When I feel down, I call or see people that have this positive energy and even though, they can't change anything in my life, talking to them makes a huge difference in the way I deal with what life throws at me.Thank you DR.Sue we are your friends and we are here for you. We all care.
Jenna520 Posted November 26, 2011 Report Posted November 26, 2011 Hi Sue. Hope today is a better day for you. I just wanted to stop in and tell you that you are on my mind and in my prayers. I hope you find the relief you so truly deserve. God Bless and big hugs.
IrmaJean Posted November 26, 2011 Report Posted November 26, 2011 i need to tell the docs what is going on. i have to. im scared.Sue, this is a step toward healing. I know you're scared. I'm sorry all of this is so painful and frightening, but you are confronting it now and this is a positive thing.how do i break the fear and manage to speak out? - the voices get so mad with me when i try to tell.Is there a way for you to give power to the part of you that wants to heal? Let that part of you be louder. Try writing things down. Do whatever you can to express yourself and have your feelings heard. We're here for you and we support you.
SweetSue Posted November 26, 2011 Author Report Posted November 26, 2011 thanks DarknessRules, possibly the best advice ive heard in so long. im not sure how to do that, but i will try.thanks jenna, beth and little bro.not sure it is possible to give power to the parts of me that want to heal. most of me has just had enough and is so very tired of it all.the voices always have all the control. they are very loud. i can only ignore them so much. they do my head in - literally. when things are harsh, its like they go for it, they can tell im weak. suggestions, are more like demands. its scarey, so very scarey. thuy are relentless.....i need it all to just stop. im scared of my own reality.
CantGiveItAway Posted November 27, 2011 Report Posted November 27, 2011 I would say youre a courageous person, Sue...And I hope you let the docs there in on whats been happening with you. You shouldnt have to carry so much on your own!!I believe in you, too...I hope you were able to get some rest today:o
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