Well it's Friday night and I find myself in the usual state. 2 percacet's and an oxy at 7pm and a half a bottle of rum later I feel fine. The numb makes me remember how I was before. The only time I feel OK is Friday or Saturday night. I am aware enough to realize that the only reason I feel good is because of drugs and alcohol but it's really a matter of make believe happiness. Sick and tired of spending a week having the poeple in my life tell me how I should think or feel. Damn, if I had cont
Started my downward slope last Friday...... I absolutely hate rapid cycling. Last week I was bullet proof, invincible and focused. This week simply another piece of crap in a world filled with crap. Not feeling sorry for myself just simply getting tired of cycling. It is friggin enough already. I have been though this for years but after a while it just wears you out. Don't bother replying, just need to vent....:mad:
Even if I don't mean it, simply trying helps. Here is a really lame-o-joke..... Q- How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb? A- Just one, but the lightbulb has to want to change.
I can't believe I am back here, been away since December 18th and now I am back. Need to manage the stress and keep things cool in my head.....cope, simply cope. so.....some random thoughts to start the day why does our society revere money so much and why are people forever comparing their lives with the lives of others as a barometer of happiness. why not make happiness the priority, it is all that matters why not try and impact someone positively and as a result, impact yourself finally a jok
I suppose this is the time that one should make a resolution or express the positive changes need to be made I am going to go the other way this time 1) make a commitment to understand what is happening in my head. 2) connect with someone who experiences the same crap I do 3) Help someone thereby helping myself It's time for another trip around the sun and I guess it makes sense to smile at the sun every now and then.
