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Bad Day Yesterday


malign

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Just to illustrate that I have problems too, but that problems don't last forever, I'm going to share excerpts from something I wrote to myself yesterday, when for some reason I was feeling unusually connected to what one might call "the bad thoughts". Ellipses (...) mean I left something out.

None of what I am has any meaning. ...

All the rules are in force, but not for others. Everyone speeds, jaywalks, does whatever they want, but when I do that, someone objects. As long as I lay down and take it, everything's fine, but when I resist, I'm the psycho.

I want to be a counselor, but there are all sorts of people at work that I can't even get along with. I read enough to be a student, but if any of it were assigned to me, I'd balk.

...

I worry that I'm being told to cut corners; in all likelihood, the others see the thing as being round and having no corners. Is either of us right?

...

Now, part of my point is that I talk to folks here fairly often with the same cognitive distortions. Yet, when they're my distortions, they still "work". I'm aware enough to know that they're distortions, but not enough to feel that they're distortions.

And another point is that, the next day, with no particular insight into why, I don't feel the same way. Which just goes to show how much attitude changes, colors, defines reality. And how easily attitudes can change.

Is either reality a delusion? No, the distortion doesn't rise to that level. But some attitudes definitely make life harder to keep on living.

Moral: Don't do as I do, do as I say. :-)

{Everyone who hated when their parents said that, raise your hand.}

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Well, okay. That means I need a better moral.

How 'bout: "Tomorrow's another day"?

Or, "The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, but some poor sucker still has to mow it"? :-)

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I know you have bad days, question yourself and have problems because you are a human being. I read that you’re a human being in your bio :-) I also read you have a dash of hope. I wish you could avoid those bad days, Mark. I know they bite even if you do know they don’t last forever.

I’m glad to hear you still want to be a counselor (I’ve been wondering about that recently). That’s great news for the many more people you will help!

And for all that green grass stuff…just don’t smoke it :o

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are you thinking of being a therapist too?

LMOA!!!!!!!!!!!!! Good one, finding :o:):D

As usual, I have to make sure what I'm thinking is what I type. I was thinking if Mark still had an interest in becoming a therapist. I was hoping so.

Still laughing....thank you for the laugh:-)

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You might surprise yourself, Ken.

And yes, I am still hoping one day to be able to help people for a living, under whatever title I can manage. You may be able to tell just from my short excerpt just how crushingly disgusted I am with my current work situation.

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I got that you are frustrated. Wish work didn't feel so heavy. It's true... do what you love and love what you're doing. You'll make it happen, Mark.

Ahh yup, I would surprise myself alright :o I'm happy doin' what I'm doin'.

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My friends are here so I'm sitting in. Sorry I missed you, Mark. I've always liked "tomorrow is another day." I hope yours is a good one.

K, I knew exactly what you meant. Interpretation can be through the reader as well. And you would make a wonderful therapist. I'm glad you're happy where you are, though.

Mark and finding would also be wonderful therapists. I miss our quick chats. Hope everyone has a good night.

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The weather is unseasonably warm here too. It's been amazing! Pup is scared of thunder, but none of that in sight here. I hope the storms aren't violent, finding.

We're chatting in your blog, Mark. :o

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Don't know why, but every time I see a ........ I have to catch my breath. Symbolism on the internet can be odd sometimes. :confused:

That's a great point, Seddy. Understanding a person can go a long way.

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Pointillophobia! :-)

I'm glad you're happy where you are, Ken. And I hope none of us stop surprising ourselves ...

I agree that if I had the opportunity to know others better, I would probably get along with them better. I have that much faith in humanity (and I'm pleased that you have it too, Seddy. Maybe you double-posted as unconscious emphasis?) :-)

It's just that this is a work situation rather than a therapeutic one, and opening up goes both ways. I may not get the opportunity to find out why others make me tic. :-)

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I'm doing okay, Ken. Off this week on spring break. My life is oddly set up so that I work and live alone. Being an introvert, it's supposed to be relaxing being alone. But then again, it's lonely. So periodically I take a vacation from all that ... And would gladly invert my life if that could be done. ;-)

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Note: I always dance like a Muppet. Beaker, to be exact. :-)

But I do cheer like Kermit.

Ken just wants to see my cookies flying upward after I lose them. It's easier to clean the glass than the upholstery.

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