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Gym this Evening


Under5

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So, I went to the gym with my wife this evening.  It’s always busy during the weekday evenings.  Today was our leg workout.  Typically, when it’s less busy I wear semi fitted, short shorts.  I decided to wear them anyways tonight even it’s fairly obvious if someone looks that I have small penis.  The shorts are otherwise perfect for leg workouts.

I’m sure people noticed.  I was fine with it.

Then, in the shower I was around well endowed men and still felt secure about myself.  There was even a client of mine who’d never seen my naked who was clothed and just started to talk to me when I was starkers.  I was good with that too.

I’m at peace with my penis because there is so much more to who I am than my genitals.  
 

I share this because it’s been a journey for me and I’ve found contentment.  I hope others who are small like me can reach some semblance of peace.

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I fucking hate that word 😂

Adonis 🤮 

I wish I had that much courage, but it makes my blood boil just thinking about a bunch of showering sideshow freaks looking at me like I'm the freak. Toothless, tattoo faced, boss eyed mouth breathers with Stella on their breath and last night's curry ruminating in their fat fucking gut. Fuck that shit, I'll never put myself in that situation again.

 

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No, I have never been an Adonis type.  I’m reasonably fit and decent  looking.  I am smart, funny, caring and emotionally resilient.  Art models come in all shapes and sizes.  It was good money on a flexible schedule.  So, I modeled for various reason but primarily to move forward on how I perceived myself.

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On 11/18/2019 at 9:33 PM, Under5 said:

So, I went to the gym with my wife this evening.  It’s always busy during the weekday evenings.  Today was our leg workout.  Typically, when it’s less busy I wear semi fitted, short shorts.  I decided to wear them anyways tonight even it’s fairly obvious if someone looks that I have small penis.  The shorts are otherwise perfect for leg workouts.

I’m sure people noticed.  I was fine with it.

Then, in the shower I was around well endowed men and still felt secure about myself.  There was even a client of mine who’d never seen my naked who was clothed and just started to talk to me when I was starkers.  I was good with that too.

I’m at peace with my penis because there is so much more to who I am than my genitals.  
 

I share this because it’s been a journey for me and I’ve found contentment.  I hope others who are small like me can reach some semblance of peace.

I do things like that, but hate every second.  Unless I'm slipping-up I don't let how I feel show.

The problem is that I know that others, men and to a lesser extent women, assign male status based on genitals.

What is rational, "there is so much more to who I am than my genitals", does not change what I know for a fact others are thinking nor abolish the reality of the phallocracy.

Women are somewhat less judgemental in my experience because many know that large dicks aren't necessarily all that great in bed. and resent arrogant guys into big dick abuse or just big dick selfishness.  However, women are very judgmental if you can't cope or have difficulty coping with being small.  Duh, they don't want a crybaby or mental cripple for a husband or mate.  They want a high status male, but often don't understand the power of the phallocracy and blame the weakness of their mate ON THEIR MATE.  I actually understand it, I think, better than they do.  They seem to want to gloss over their attitude.

By the way, I participated in long threads at the Large Penis Support Group (LPSG).   Essentially, in my mind, I proved the phallocracy.  Guys with large dicks (especially "progressive intellectual ones) often vehemently deny the existence of the phallocracy and blame the small dick guy for being delusional, thus blaming the victim.  This is often subconscious on their part.  On the other hand, many big dick guys relish their "superiority" recounting stories of cuckoldry, ruining women for their small husbands and boy friends, etc etc.

 

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On 11/21/2019 at 9:37 PM, Klingsor said:

Sorry. Poor choice of words I guess. My declamation may not be accurate anyway...standards of beauty were different in the 1970’s when I’m presuming this guy grew up. Men didn’t wax every nook and cranny of their bodies or spend 3 hours a day in the gym, counting grams of macronutrients every meal. Unless they were professional athletes. Even 15 years ago when I started college you could still be skinny and gangly and not be constantly “mogged” by other dudes, except the athletes who were like another species. Today it is completely different. It’s an entirely different universe, sexually speaking, than even 10 years ago. Men over 40 seem to have an extremely difficult time realizing this.

I looked-up mogged and was more and more confused by usages.  Do you mean "shown-up?"  Do you mean obviously?  I've always assumed men were comparing in all situations on all scales, but it wasn't obvious.  Is it obvious now?   Do men now do something fairly obvious to put down men to whom they feel superior in height, build, genitals, etc.

Not clear to me what you are saying.  I'm 73, now.

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21 hours ago, lbaker said:

By the way, I participated in long threads at the Large Penis Support Group (LPSG).   Essentially, in my mind, I proved the phallocracy.  Guys with large dicks (especially "progressive intellectual ones) often vehemently deny the existence of the phallocracy and blame the small dick guy for being delusional, thus blaming the victim.  This is often subconscious on their part.  On the other hand, many big dick guys relish their "superiority" recounting stories of cuckoldry, ruining women for their small husbands and boy friends, etc etc.

You have my respect and appreciation for doing that. I would lose my mind just reading those types of threads. Even the idea of “large penis SUPPORT GROUP” stokes my rage. 
 

13 minutes ago, lbaker said:

I looked-up mogged and was more and more confused by usages.  Do you mean "shown-up?"  Do you mean obviously?  I've always assumed men were comparing in all situations on all scales, but it wasn't obvious.  Is it obvious now.  Not clear to me what you are saying.  I'm 73, now.

It’s another incel word. It’s form and etymology is best suited to describing the feeling I have when I’m around another male who is superior in some way. I used to think I was the only one who felt this way. Yes it basically means to show-up, but not in an intentional “Haha you’re such a loser” way, just merely by having better genetics. It can refer to anything. For example: a group of male friends are walking down the street, one of them is 6’6” tall - that guy “mogs” his friends.

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Mog

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19 minutes ago, lbaker said:

I've always assumed men were comparing in all situations on all scales, but it wasn't obvious.  Is it obvious now.  Not clear to me what you are saying.  I'm 73, now.

Why is this so difficult for most men to admit? I always assumed this as well. Took it for granted. That’s why I just accepted my place as a eunuch. 

Strangely enough, I think someone your age understands these issues better than someone who’s in the 45-50 range.

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I may have mentioned this before, but I have been explicitly mogged while playing sports, especially in the locker room.

It is one thing to feel mogged by your own silent comparison to others and quite another to have a guy demonstrate it!  The worst case was when a guy a head taller than me with large genitals pulled my face into his nude lap while we happened to be sitting next to each other in the locker room.  I acquitted my self acceptably by elbowing him and not showing the deep distress I felt, but it was quite a challenge.

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1 minute ago, Klingsor said:

Why is this so difficult for most men to admit? I always assumed this as well. Took it for granted. That’s why I just accepted my place as a eunuch. 

A lot of people are very repressed.  They seem to keep a great deal out of their conscious minds.  My father never admitted concern about his genital status.  He had compensated by being capable of rather extreme violence via his training as a wrestler, football quaterback, baseball catcher and team leader, etc.

He told me right out that men ALWAYS are sizing each other up for the possibility of violence.  He never mentioned sex as he was totally repressed about that!

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Just now, lbaker said:

My father never admitted concern about his genital status.  He had compensated by being capable of rather extreme violence via his training as a wrestler, football quaterback, baseball catcher and team leader, etc.

He told me right out that men ALWAYS are sizing each other up for the possibility of violence.  He never mentioned sex as he was totally repressed about that!

EXACTLY. I wish I had had sexual experiences much earlier than I did and realized how small I am. It would have motivated me to become physically intimidating to the point that I could have beat the shit out of anyone, even in prison. Or at least tried to get there.

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My father happened to be working at the Vickers Corp during the nation's 1st sitdown strike during the great depression  He was quarterback at a local college who got him the job in the factory.   Before TV, local sports was a big thing and you didn't have to be NFL material to play.  Small colleges had well attended sports team which made money.

Of course, the strike was not organic coming from the workers who felt very privileged to have a job, but was organized by communists trying to organize a union or cause a revolution. 

Thugs came to his work station and told him to stop working and not  to leave his work station.  My dad refused so they manhandled him away from his machine.  Using his wrestling knowledge, he broke one guys arm and sprinted to the fence and climbed out of the factory grounds to be on time for football practice.

I think the National Guard or Pinkertons finally restored the factory to its owners.  I should look up the history.

Yeah, checking google.  Looks like the Vickers strike may have been one of a wave of them during the depression, not really the 1st as my dad thought

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I wonder how much of this “phallocracy” exits in other cultures.  I’ve studied enough anthropology and history to question if this is inherent in our species or really exaggerated in our culture.  In the US in particular, we value “big”, violence, and supposed dominance.

Regardless, I’ve chosen a different path.  I’m strangely an alpha type male without really trying.  When at the gym with my beautiful and fit wife, men always leave her alone.  The guys at the gym are always respectful towards me.  I’m only 5’9” and there are a lot of guys stronger than me at the gym.

I have a lot of confidence in myself because I am very smart, well read, a kind but tough person, a great dad, and a wonderful friend.  I know I am worthy of my wife’s love.

And, I know I have a small penis.  It’s tough to do but I rarely think about what anyone thinks of my penis.  Fuck them.  I’ve got one life to love and I’m going to enjoy it.

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Google phallic religion, phallicism, phallus worship, etc.  You will be stunned.  \

Some have jumped to the conclusion that because flaccid penises are often small or average on Greek and Roman statues, their cultures did not venerate the large penis.

Not exactly.  They did did associate the giant penis with the primitive barbarian tribes they often warred against.  They associated the large penis with intemperance and irrationality, ie. rampaging primitives often worship phallic totems, etc.  Plus, they perceived African and Middle East civilization perhaps as being better endowed.  So, did they really not value the large penis?   Hmm!  Sounds to me much like the attitude of the South toward Black slaves.  Ever read the novel, Mandingo?

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14 hours ago, Klingsor said:

You have my respect and appreciation for doing that. I would lose my mind just reading those types of threads. Even the idea of “large penis SUPPORT GROUP” stokes my rage. 

I tried to point-out that a penis size pecking order (phallocracy) develops in male peer groups, work groups, teams, etc.  Typically, they would insist no on knows the size of your penis unless you show them.  I would insist that even if you are a hermit and don't socialize in normal male things like sports, hunting, camping, hiking, etc. you inevitably must at least urinate near the other men, use the same locker rooms, etc. etc.  If you avoid those activities or are compulsively modest in those situations, you stigmatize yourself.

When golfing with my father as he entertained business associates, for instance, we were both treated to small penis jokes in the showers.  Small penis jokes in private settings like urinating in the woods, or in public entertainment is all the proof of phallocracy I need.  Guys with large penises just laugh it off with mirth and incredulity, much like Whites often deny racism.  Pretty interesting.  Basically, what they do is gas lighting.  They try to make you think you are the crazy one.

They thought they could shut me up by ridiculing me in the LPSG threads.  Being anonymous I just kept pointing to the flaws in their responses.  They would become more and more outraged, eventually putting me on ignore when they finally realized intimidation wouldn't shut me up.

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On 11/24/2019 at 9:11 PM, lbaker said:

I tried to point-out that a penis size pecking order (phallocracy) develops in male peer groups, work groups, teams, etc.  Typically, they would insist no on knows the size of your penis unless you show them.  I would insist that even if you are a hermit and don't socialize in normal male things like sports, hunting, camping, hiking, etc. you inevitably must at least urinate near the other men, use the same locker rooms, etc. etc.  If you avoid those activities or are compulsively modest in those situations, you stigmatize yourself.

When golfing with my father as he entertained business associates, for instance, we were both treated to small penis jokes in the showers.  Small penis jokes in private settings like urinating in the woods, or in public entertainment is all the proof of phallocracy I need.  Guys with large penises just laugh it off with mirth and incredulity, much like Whites often deny racism.  Pretty interesting. 

 

 

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1 hour ago, Klingsor said:

That's the point, they do it in such a way that if you lose control and lash out, you're the crazy one, latent homosexual, etc even though they all fucking know and snigger about it. 

Your movie clip show the "patronizing mentor" thing I was talking about. . .  though I don't know the rest of the context, I can guess!

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