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Negative thinkin


AndreaB

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I have alot of negative thoughts in my mind I can't seem to get rid of them. They're ruining my life I don't enjoy much of anything and its frustrating. I don't know what I'm going to say when I'm in the middle of a sentence. I say ummm alot and I just go blank. It's bad. All I want to do is cry. Please any advice on how I can change my negative thought pattern?

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Hello Andrea... I know that life sometimes seems heavy and it seems easier to just stop trying; but you would miss the gifts of tomarrow, the Christmas gift in bright red paper, the birthday gift in a small square box, the gift of the present and the bright blue sky... Look for these small moments of happiness and focus on them, for in these moments you will find yourself BEING happy... (this may help you remember how it feels).... If you find that you are smiling say "I am smiling, so I must be happy", then find reasons to smile; a silly song, or just a song that you love; a movie that always makes you laugh... We Must live, laugh, love or life has no feeling....:) Love to you friend....

Why was Tigger looking in the toilet?

He was searching for Pooh! :)

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I have alot of negative thoughts in my mind I can't seem to get rid of them. They're ruining my life I don't enjoy much of anything and its frustrating. I don't know what I'm going to say when I'm in the middle of a sentence. I say ummm alot and I just go blank. It's bad. All I want to do is cry. Please any advice on how I can change my negative thought pattern?

Maybe try and look on the brighter side of life. Things that help you feel happy. Not things that are so upetting, and sad. Be around happy, upbeat people. Watch funny shows, comedy movies, play with puppies, things that will certainly put a smile on your face. Help others in need. that always makes me feel better when I know I made a difference in someone else's life. There is always somebody less fortunate then I who needs a helping hand.

Try not to think too much. Clear your mind, and try to relax. Make all the bad stuff go away, maybe it is just all stress. I find it difficult to talk when there is too much stress in my life.

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thank you both for reminding me to look at the brighter things in life. I feel better when people care about me. I also like helping people it makes me feel good too. Iamlove I appreciate your post because life is different everyday and puppies make me smile and laugh. I'll try to keep all the good things in my head even when I'm having a bad day:)

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Guest ASchwartz

Andrea and all,

If puppies make you smile I hope you enjoy watching these puppies grow:

http://www.ecadpuppy.org/camPop.asp

These are real puppies. Their Mom is Rosa, Mingo's daughter, and they will all be service dogs for the physically and emotionally disabled. So, even though Mingo is gone, she lives on and continues her great work through her daugher and grandchildren.

Enjoy viewing them.

If they are off camera for now its because they are being cleaned and fed. Come back later.

P.S.: None of these pups are for sale.

Allan :)

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I have had several people- friends, pdoc, T, etc.- tell me I have a "tendency" to always think of the negative first. But, it is usually negative thinking about myself. For example, when T was running behind, I started panicking, wondering "did I come on the wrong day?", "did they cancel my appt and I forgot?", "did I cancel and forget?", "did I come at the wrong time?", "would she prefer not to see me today?" It never crossed my mind that there was a legitimate reason, which had nothing to do with me, for the delay.

Whats funny (to me anyway) is that everybody tells me I need to "change my thinking" but nobody has explained to me exactly how to do that. So, obviously, I am in the same boat and have no advice.

Apparently, this has been my thought pattern since childhood because I can honestly remember having sudden panic as a child anytime something went wrong and my mind flooding with all of the negative possibilities. How do you change a thought process so ingrained?

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Guest ASchwartz

Hi Andrea,

Well, negative thoughts may be the only thoughts you have right now but it is not the only thoughts you ever had. Remind yourself of positive thoughts you had in the past or:

Think about something you love: maybe a beautiful beach, or a lovely forest, or a beautiful ocean or some music you love or some picture you love: then think of it, about it, picture it, smell it, remind yourself of it. This will help you to feel a little better.

Allan:)

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thats what I would like to know. How do you change negative thoughts if thats all you think about?

Maybe if you can do positive things? that will turn off the negative thoughts. Maybe call a friend or visit a friend? Take action? go for a walk or something to get your mind off the negativity. Distract yourself.

Are you certain that you not depressed at all? When I get like that, I had a lot of negative thoughts rule me. And I could not shake it. Is there anything triggering these thoughts?

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I was thinking along those lines too, like mscat. There could be some negative beliefs behind those negative thoughts AndreaB that need to be brought to the light. Some where along the line you might have started believing some things that are not really true, or started protecting yourself in ways that in the end are walling you in.... What do you think?:(

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there are alot of negative thoughts i have from my childhood. I grew up in a domestically abusive home for most of my life. I talk to my father, but not my mother. I don't feel close to anyone in my family. I feel like I have no family. I have major issues with them, but I don't want to talk about it with them. My dad is in denial and my mother was or still is on drugs. My sister all she does is have babies. I never feel good enough. I don't feel pretty enough skinny enough or smart enough. Its as if my life is suppose to be one big disappointment. I live on my own to escape my past hurts but they haunt me in my dreams. I have nigthmares all the time. I wish it would just go away but I can't make it. I don't know what to do. I have no beautiful things to think about at all nor can I think positive it's always negative. I wish I could be a beautiful care free person but I can't and I dislike my life and myself. I feel pathetic and so empty all the time:(

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Sometimes we think we are worrying when we are really using foresight, or intuition to keep us from making mistakes or being harmed. It can be very overwhelming to constantly see what bad can happen, but it is a blessing to be aware of it... I used to have this philosophy... I would assume that the worst would happen because if it did I had already mentally prepared for it.. so I would not be devestated if it did... I would just say "that figures".. and if the worst did not happen then I would be so excited and happy (thankful) for all the small blessings that most people take for granted. Example: it never failed if I was in a hurry at the grocery store the register would run out of tape or the item wouldn't scan.... but "that figured".... Next time when this didn't happen and I checked right through... I was instantly happy (thankful) for everything running smoothly.... I also have come to believe that because the tape did eventually have to run out that it was meant for it to happen to me because I would not over react or be hateful to the poor cashier (who's fault it wasn't) because I had already figured it would happen.... Serving my purpose....

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Guest ASchwartz

AndreaB and Iamlove,

Andrea, listen to what Iamlove is trying to tell you. She is saying that it is the way you are thinking that is depressing you. For example, Andrea, you said that

worry stress disappointment anger denial sadness all trigger my depression jealously is one big trigger. facebook and myspace also trigger my depression. my life in general is a big trigger
.

You are doing something called "Overgeneralizing." Everything in your life is not a trigger for depression. In fact, there are plenty of things that are positive but, you are not remembering them, or you are discounting them. What are some of the things you like and enjoy. I do not care how "small or unimportant" you think they are. What are some of them? What are some of the happy occasions you have had in your life? What are some of your successes?

Please read the article I posted today on Mentalhelp.net

Allan :(

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I understand what Iamlove is saying but those little things don't make me happy all the times. What does make me happy is reading a good book. Laughing I love laughing. The weather is getting warmer that makes me happy. I like waking up to birds singing. It makes me feel like if the birds are happy it's going to be a good day. I had another nightmare this morning and I wasn't going to go to school or work, but an inccendent with my sister happen and I got up. So I figured get up and go to school and work. I'm happy that I don't want to harm myself. I'm happy that I'm seeking help. I just saw a dog and that made me happy. I overgeneralize everything I think to much about simple things I make them hard. My success was paying off school by myself and having the strength to go back. Where's the article link? Thank you for all your help. I realize now that everything in my life isn't a trigger for my depression I just think it is. I like watching the puppies u put up

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Funny, I noticed this morning too that the birds were singing (very loudly! Demanding me to pay notice to them) So I said "if the birds are singing then it MUST be a good day !". Birds of a feather.....

The article was very good, "stinkin' thinkin'" creates negative livin'. :rolleyes:

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