Every damn woman is a cock tease.

[HAHA!]

I'm a virgin at 21. I fucking hate it. I live in my parents place and I never go out. But I like to look from the window. Our neighbors are a young family with 2 baby daughters. Their mother is a damn MILF. She has the biggest breasts you ever seen. They are pretty slappy, but then again, it means they're probably real.

When I have suicidal thoughts. (I'm not suicidal but do have thoughts.) I plan on breaking in to their house and rape her. But it will remain a fantasy. Don't think I can rape. I used to be normal, going out to parties. I was still considerd a "weirdo." I locked a girl in with me in a bedroom. I think I scared her enough to make out with me. I wanted to fuck her so bad! But I let her go, even if I was drunk I wouldn't rape someone. (Which sucks for me.)

I have had planned to go to a sex tourism destination like Thailand. I do have the money after years of being at home all day long. But I'm too scared to dare.

So this is me. What do I want to know? I want to know how I can get a lady friend. Is there some kind of dating site for weirdos with social anxiety and missfits?

Edited May 17, 2009 by HAHA!

[finding my way]

So HA, you are reaching out to us with your impulse drives and your lizard brain. That might be a way to start if there is no other choice for you. You really don’t need to do that to get OUR attention, just so you know. Now that lizard brain has brought you here, and we are listening, you might want to venture a little further into your cortex before you choose your words. We have real live sexual abuse victims here, whose lives have been ripped to shreds by their experiences. We care about that and about them. You will need to consider the impact you have on other people to stay welcome at this site. It’s something to consider anyway in order to climb out of the social hole you’re in. At the moment you are welcome here, and I hope you continue to engage with your issues. I’m just letting you know there are limits to what we will allow you to put people through.

[HAHA!]

So HA, you are reaching out to us with your impulse drives and your lizard brain. That might be a way to start if there is no other choice for you. You really don’t need to do that to get OUR attention, just so you know. Now that lizard brain has brought you here, and we are listening, you might want to venture a little further into your cortex before you choose your words. We have real live sexual abuse victims here, whose lives have been ripped to shreds by their experiences. We care about that and about them. You will need to consider the impact you have on other people to stay welcome at this site. It’s something to consider anyway in order to climb out of the social hole you’re in. At the moment you are welcome here, and I hope you continue to engage with your issues. I’m just letting you know there are limits to what we will allow you to put people through.

HAHA! Senior Member? That makes you a long standing member. But you're not a moderator and shoul'd NOT tell me how to behave. You are in no position to tell me what this forum believs. Sure, you might have become a good friend with the administrator. But that does not change anything. In many forums it's against the rules to talk like you. And in a big enough message board, this post will have given you a warning.

[smallstar]

haha, maybe you could try having a little respect for the feelings of others. Someone doesn't have to be a moderator or adminstrator to tell another member that they may be crossing a line, and that you may want to think about what you write before you type it, realize how what you post here could effect other people.

[HAHA!]

haha, maybe you could try having a little respect for the feelings of others. Someone doesn't have to be a moderator or adminstrator to tell another member that they may be crossing a line, and that you may want to think about what you write before you type it, realize how what you post here could effect other people.

Well that was better. I'm sorry for being offensive.

[kaudio]

Respect is highly valued among the members of this community, HAHA. While you are more than welcome to share your thoughts with us, I ask that the provocative language used in your posts from now on be kept to a minimum. Referring to every woman as 'cock tease', and calling someone a MILF, are demeaning acts as you are inappropriately sexualizing others. Just as you have posted in other threads regarding the direction of your life, and concerns about suicidal thoughts, the people around you are more than mere sexual objects. As finding mentioned, there are members here who are victims of sexual abuse. I think her point was to tell you to be considerate of the other members here, not that she was somehow trying to exercise her experience or status against you.

Smallstar is correct in saying that it does not take moderator or administrator status to exercise a little empathy. As it seems you understand this, HAHA, one question that comes to mind is do you refer to women in such a demeaning manner frequently? I ask because you clearly wish to change your situation, but it seems that you are also looking for a 'quick fix' through sex tourism or dating sites. This may certainly satisfy you in the short-term, but it will not solve the deeper issue of having fulfilling relationships with other people.

Edited May 17, 2009 by kaudio
To add

[HAHA!]

Respect is highly valued among the members of this community, HAHA. While you are more than welcome to share your thoughts with us, I ask that the provocative language used in your posts from now on be kept to a minimum. Referring to every woman as 'cock tease', and calling someone a MILF, are demeaning acts as you are inappropriately sexualizing others. Just as you have posted in other threads regarding the direction of your life, and concerns about suicidal thoughts, the people around you are more than mere sexual objects. As finding mentioned, there are members here who are victims of sexual abuse. I think her point was to tell you to be considerate of the other members here, not that she was somehow trying to exercise her experience or status against you.

Smallstar is correct in saying that it does not take moderator or administrator status to exercise a little empathy. As it seems you understand this, HAHA, one question that comes to mind is do you refer to women in such a demeaning manner frequently? I ask because you clearly wish to change your situation, but it seems that you are also looking for a 'quick fix' through sex tourism or dating sites. This may certainly satisfy you in the short-term, but it will not solve the deeper issue of having fulfilling relationships with other people.

I have 0 social intelligence. If I have offended someone, I don't know how.

What am I supposed to call women? Sexualy arousing but off limits? The quick fix wooul'd be to call an escort. Sex tourism is to spend one week with one girl. GEF, (Girl Friend Experience.)

[mscat]

I have 0 social intelligence. If I have offended someone, I don't know how.

What am I supposed to call women? Sexualy arousing but off limits? The quick fix wooul'd be to call an escort. Sex tourism is to spend one week with one girl. GEF, (Girl Friend Experience.)

Yes, the 0 social intelligence, may be true, however, in your posts I see that it comes out directly towards woman. That is degrading, disrespectful, and insulting. When other members have pointed this out to you, you have then personally become upset with them. This is my observation. I also see that your devalue women, and treat us like objects. Only good for one thing?:mad: In my opinion , you were not only just offensive, you had crossed the line >

[paula]

Can I point out to you HAHA that Finding my way has been asked on numerous occasions to be a Moderator, both of some of the members of this site and also of the Administrators. It is Finding my way who has turned this position down because of her own reasons, not that it has anything to do with you or anyone of us!

But when you come onto our forum site and try and communicate with your foul ways then as smallstar and no doubt plenty of other members on this site are thinking, HAVE SOME RESPECT! Thats if you want to stay on this site, otherwise, sling your hook!

[kaudio]

It takes time, patience, and effort to give yourself to a relationship, and even then, there are no guarantees that the other will respond in kind, and in a way that is immediately gratifying. Sometimes relationships seem like work, sometimes one needs to push through anger, frustration, and embarrassing moments, and sometimes it all seems like it isn't worth the trouble. But, if you persist, I am sure that you will realize that you have the potential to enjoy these meaningful relationships, and that you may already have such relationships. The problem with escorts and sex tourism is that one gains the companionship of another human being without the depth offerred through shared troubles and hardships. One can never improve 'social intelligence' with escorts because if there is ever a problem, everyone walks away.

Among the self-help books that I have read (not that much so I am not an expert), one of the big themes is to encourage the readers to define the outcome, or to 'keep the end in mind'. For instance, in “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People,” by Stephen Covey, the reader is encouraged to try an exercise where he takes a moment to consider what things would be like after death – not in terms of the afterlife though. So, the reader imagines attending the funeral services for some poor soul, and it turns out that the services are for himself! During the service, a friend, a member of your family, your boss, and someone from the volunteer group you donated your time to gets up and shares with those present an idea of who you were while you were alive.

The reader is then asked to think about what he would like these people to say at the funeral service. What kind of person do they remember you as? What kind of character traits, values, and virtues do they admire you for? Were you kind? Patient? Tenacious? As morbid as this exercise may be, Covey wishes to convey the point that while defining the outcomes one desires day-to-day is important, human mortality inevitably demands that each of us leave everything upon death. As such, besides the material possessions that one may pass along, accrued over the course of a lifetime, there are also the transeunt acts that one leaves behind, like how one effects the lives of others with their conduct.

In other words, it's not how to act, or what you have to say that determines your social intelligence. Rather, it is how you want to be remembered by the people around you, and by the women you may or may not be interested in. Once you define that, then you create your own standards for social intelligence. If you want to be remembered as a caring, responsible, and kind man, then you have to be a caring, responsible, and kind man. You have to determine the actions that can be construed as caring, responsible, and kind, and do them. This applies to potential girlfriends as it does all of the other people in your life.

It may be helpful for you to explore this funeral service scenario for yourself. Sure, all of this may be great, and it does not help address your current desires, but it is a good start to begin exploring the social intelligence you feel you lack.

Edited May 17, 2009 by kaudio

[Guest ASchwartz]

My dear lad, HaHa,

Well, I am an administrator and I want to assure you that I am both worried about you and your health and worried about the women you have offended with your aggressive attitude.

Let me explain how you have bruised some feelings here:

1. Women are not "cock teasers" as you say. Quite to the contrary, once you develop some Emotional Intelllgence many good females will be happy to end your virginity and in ways that will help both you and them feel really good. However, you must learn to think before you speak. Do not curse at people and try to be polite.

2. Refrain from telling people that they are not adminstrators or moderators here. You do not know whether they are or not. Also, EVERYONE here has a right to have their dignity respected, even you.

3. Your description of women as having "floppy breasts" is degrading and offensive. What, should they say the same about your penis??? No, and I do not want that.

4. Going to Thailand to get sex is a fast way to get an HIV infection and to be arrested and imprisoned in that country. Trust me, you do not want either of those things to happen.

So, why not begin anew and let us know about the Real You. It seems that you are young and have not yet had sex. What is wrong? Why not? What is your life like?

By the way, I do not believe that you have Zero intelligence. No way.

Allan, also know as Dr. Allan N. Schwartz, PhD, administrator for the Mental Help Community.

[th wisperer]

wounder why you are a 21 year old vergin as lady's have as much rights as us men to be independant and make there own choices as if you talk like that to any lady's wounder why you are still a vergin i really think you need a attitude change myself and to learn respect to the females

[tracey.f]

I have read what you have previously written. I will try to be as objective as i am capable of being !

I was raped when i was younger, i had to face this excuse of a person ( I am

trying not to be insulting, unlike you ! ) every day for over 6 months. You see, this person was i thought a friend of mine, we had hung out for ages. I felt for a long time, thought that what happened was my fault, how did you put it ? THAT I HAD ASKED FOR IT !!! Let me tell YOU something, this did not make him a MAN, i did not ASK FOR IT and i had not or have i ever been A TEASE! The only MISTAKE i made was to TRUST this person as a friend !!!!

So let me give you some constructive advise, GET YOURSELF some help! If you take this obsession to another level,It could destroy not only your life but if you have one and i want to believe you do. YOUR SOUL!

You seem to be reaching out for help, its a good start.

I hope not only for your sake but more for the females that are in your life right now, you do the right thing. Perhaps the reason you have a problem with your social skills, is because you come accross so angry. That might be a place to start.!.!

[HAHA!]

Damn! I thought I was weird. Is this a damn church?

[smallstar]

nah, not a church, not only church people care about other people, that is a quality many humans have in common, empathy?, maybe that's the word? I think you struck a nerve with some people, people who found your choice of words rather offensive than of course instead of starting over, using more appropriate words to express yourself you chose to insult these people a second time with a personal attack. Why don't you try to tell us about yourself without being so condescending and ridiculing? You know I'm sure that there are people who may be able to relate to you or share some advice or at least offer their support. I would hate to see you not get any help or support here when you need it. Maybe you could just try again and try to keep in mind that certain things, which you should be able to recognize, will be offensive to some and try to avoid those things? I think even though you feel you have 0 social intelligence that you are capable of expressing yourself and your issues in a more appropriate way.

Edited May 19, 2009 by smallstar

[mscat]

Damn! I thought I was weird. Is this a damn church?

HAAH! now that is the funniest thing you have written so far! Absolutely not a religious affliation at all in this fourm. However, there is respect . That is ALL that is required.

No matter male or female. Just do not insulting .If your having an issue and covering it up by writing derrogatory comments about women , then it is no help to you. Just going to create many highly defensive responses in return. Maybe that is what you want? Nobody is impressed by your smokescreen. Be honest in here so we can help you and be supportive. Quit putting females down. It is not our fault that you have hang ups surrounding our gender, or very inexperienced. Perhaps we are a threat to you? Or you just had not gotten enough mommy time? My son is nearly 16 yrs old, not too much younger than you. I have nephews older than you. What's really wrong? W/O using all your vulgar language, can't you express yourself in a more decent matter?

By the way, I am 100% woman, straight, lots of tattoos, a eye piercing, but have a few "things" I deal with that would make you Faint > To me you are just a kid , trying to find your way in this world. Your name calling, and insults , leave a lot to be desired, however, I think it is your way of catching everybody's attention on this fourm. Well yuo got it, now why don't you tell us what really is bothering you?

[HAHA!]

What the? I don't hate women, I love women. And I never insulted women. Word's are never good or bad, it's how you mean it. Calling an old man a whore can be funny. Calling a young woman a whore is degrading.

MILF and cock tease are not degrading to women. And I do have empathy, that's why I can't rape even under the influence of alcohol.

This started cause a feminist attacked me in the second post. This changed the mood for the remainder of the thread. People choose to see me attacking women.

I didn't do anything wrong.

[tracey.f]

Thank you for your reply, i am not religious but can see how you could see it that way.Take care.

Edited May 19, 2009 by tracey.f
would rather not post.

[Guest ASchwartz]

HaHa,

Let me try one more time with you: This is no choice and the members who post here are not reacting to you because they are feminists. They are reacting to you because you use offensive language and, at 21 years of age, you should know better. A person does not have to be in Church in order to behave in socially acceptable ways. Your comments are demeaning. You say that you have done nothing wrong but you are incorrect. The way you post here, the language you use and the nasty things you say about women are appreciated by no one and they are Wrong. Clean up your act.

Dr. Schwartz

[HAHA!]

HaHa,

Let me try one more time with you: This is no choice and the members who post here are not reacting to you because they are feminists. They are reacting to you because you use offensive language and, at 21 years of age, you should know better. A person does not have to be in Church in order to behave in socially acceptable ways. Your comments are demeaning. You say that you have done nothing wrong but you are incorrect. The way you post here, the language you use and the nasty things you say about women are appreciated by no one and they are Wrong. Clean up your act.

Dr. Schwartz

Alright that's it! I'm going and not comming back. You people have serious issues. Maybe being here, around a lot of mental issues, for too long has affected you.

You people are weird and annoying.

Bye!

[malign]

But you felt the need to come back to tell us.

What part of "be nice and you can stay" is weird and annoying? Is it that you don't understand what part of what you said was not nice?

If you want to be chased away, it's easy. If you want to stay and talk about something productive, it's still actually pretty easy. Just pretend that you're talking to a woman you respect, if there are any.

[John Rutledge]

deleted.....

Edited October 28, 2009 by John Rutledge

[Mark]

HaHa,

I'm late to the party, but since I've arrived, I'll put in my two cents.

I can see that you've got legitimate questions that you want help with thinking through, and this is a good place to do that sort of thing. You've also got a way of speaking that pushes buttons, at least in terms of the culture of this community. I suspect part of this may simply be a generational thing - you being younger than many who frequent here. However, I also suspect that you've got some anger issues which you may not be fully in touch with, and those are helping to fuel your provocative way of communicating.

So what is happening here is that you are being confronted based on your violation of protocol - your potty mouth basically and the hostile connotations of your terms - we WANT to hear what you have to say and help you work it through but we don't want to have you triggering those people here who have been harmed sexually in the past, and we don't want to suffer a fool either. And that is kinda how you are coming off here - swaggering in like a young and foolishly puffed-up macho boy. Afraid to be vulnerable so instead projecting swagger. You think you're maintaining cool, but we see a frightened kid.

The fact that you've been responded to at all should be evidence to you that we'd like to help (because otherwise we'd just ban you) - we recognize people in pain like yourself - but you are missing that caring part of our collective response it seems. You are perceiving our request that you play by our rules as an attack and acting defensively. I request that you think about this and reconsider your options. Please take this opportunity to talk about your issues in a more polite, mature way - if you can manage it - and we will try to help you as we are able. If you can't or don't want to manage that, then this conversation will be at an end, but your pain will still be there.

Mark

[silentmist]

I hope HAHA comes back. I'm really interested in hearing how he came believe that all woman are cock teasers and whats laying underneath that perception of his.

His language was angry and was responded to with anger. I think that when people post in these forums it may be after a long period of containing emotional baggage and some people may use this forum to vent steam. I think we should be temporarily tolerant of such abusive behaviour as long as it is explored positively.

What happened in this thread IMO is that HAHA was critically paranted which placed a pressure onto HAHA to be the adapted child. HAHA was having none of it. In fact, he may have deliberately set up that provocation so that he could 'have a go' at the object of his anger, in this case it would seem to be woman. For some reason HAHA has developed a negative schema for woman and is expressing itself in a sexualised form. If HAHA is socially limited or isolated then his main awareness of the world would probably be via mass media, including pornography ('MILF' is a pornographic acronym). The media does sexualise woman to the Nth degree. Something i'm increasingly angry with myself. I feel it is doing incredible damage to our societies throughout the 'developed' world.

There could be dozens of explanations for HAHA's form of expressing himself and i think we should have explored that a little before, if ever, treating him as a naughty child.

[finding my way]

Go silentmist!!!! Those are insightful words:)