lacyjay87 Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 (edited) .......................... Edited November 24, 2009 by lacyjay87 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SweetSue Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Lacy,What do you want to say to them ?Briefly (please its like 4:30am for me) tell us whats wrong.and we will try and help Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lacyjay87 Posted November 24, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 (edited) ..................... Edited November 24, 2009 by lacyjay87 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IrmaJean Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Lacy, are you okay? Are you safe? Have you been taking something? If you call the hotline, I would suggest just telling them the truth. If you are in danger, please call 911. I am concerned. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lacyjay87 Posted November 24, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 (edited) ........................... Edited November 24, 2009 by lacyjay87 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulianP Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 (edited) deleted..... Edited February 6, 2010 by JulianP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lacyjay87 Posted November 24, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 (edited) ............................... Edited November 24, 2009 by lacyjay87 the color purple did not show up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JulianP Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 (edited) deleted..... Edited February 6, 2010 by JulianP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lacyjay87 Posted November 24, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 (edited) ........................ Edited November 24, 2009 by lacyjay87 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SweetSue Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 david o tells me i need to get therapy...for my depressionLacy,Many of us here on this forum have been telling you to seek medical advice since the day that you joined us.It dosnt seem fair to me that you seem to be mis placing all your sadness and anger onto David O.Yes David O kindly responded to you, several times as I recall, and in each of his posts to you he has shown compassion, and understanding.Am I going to be quoted next ? I have responded to many of your posts aswell.All Im trying to say is, maybe you are interpretting some posts wrongly.Every poster here that I have come across, or even the hundreds of posts here that I have read. majority if not all of those posts have been kind hearted, understanding and sympathetic.You do need to get help Lacy, you told me on one of your many posts that you were going to go to the doctors.Help lines in the middle of the night are usually for emergencies, for people whom are desperate. If you feel this desperate or if you are in danger of harming yourself or others, then please, call 999, oh sorry I think it is 911 in your country.Please seek help first thing in the morning and if you can then let us know how you get on.Trying to blame others for your own actions, isnt really going to help anyone.We do all care about you and how you are feeling. And all we have ever any of us done is try to help you.Please keep us all informed of any progress you make in finding the proffesional help and support, you both need and deserveTake careJjTake care Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lacyjay87 Posted November 24, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Lacy,Many of us here on this forum have been telling you to seek medical advice since the day that you joined us.It dosnt seem fair to me that you seem to be mis placing all your sadness and anger onto David O.Some one asked me why i was calling the hotline and i was telling that person it was b/c david o helped me to realize that i needed to call someone, bu ti was not sure what a hotline was for, or if that was the rout ei needed to go. I was a little confused on what a hotline was.Yes David O kindly responded to you, several times as I recall, and in each of his posts to you he has shown compassion, and understanding.Yes he has, bu ti felt lik ehe was picking on me in the PM Am I going to be quoted next ? I have responded to many of your posts aswell.All Im trying to say is, maybe you are interpretting some posts wrongly.I know i have, and thats what im trying to tell you to that maybe you interperted my blog wrongly.Every poster here that I have come across, or even the hundreds of posts here that I have read. majority if not all of those posts have been kind hearted, understanding and sympathetic.I agreeYou do need to get help Lacy, you told me on one of your many posts that you were going to go to the doctors.I was thast why i called the hotline but i hung up bc i did not know what to say fro sure...but i dont know if i want help now bc what if they dont believe me? Help lines in the middle of the night are usually for emergencies,oh i did not know that it is a good thing i hung up then thx for letting me for people whom are desperate. If you feel this desperate or if you are in danger of harming yourself or others, then please, call 999, oh sorry I think it is 911 in your country.Please seek help first thing in the morning and if you can then let us know how you get on.Trying to blame others for your own actions, isnt really going to help anyone.when did i do this?We do all care about you and how you are feeling. And all we have ever any of us done is try to help you.I know that...thats what i keep saying in post i say thx you all so much i apprecitate it and so onPlease keep us all informed of any progress you make in finding the proffesional help and support, you both need and deservei dont want people to think that i am malingering, so i dont know what to do i was all geared up to call that pathways place and then i went to my pm's and i was suprised somone would say that to me...i duno..thx fro the postTake careJjTake carethx fro the post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest GingerSnap Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Lacy: I am sorry that all of this has upset you. I wonder when all of this began. Did you have a good life before you moved to the little town where maybe it doesn't suit you at all. I saw that you are a member of both Facebook and Classmates and it seems that a lot must have changed quickly in your life. Since you listed MentalHelp as one of your connections on Facebook, I am wondering if any of your friends may have picked up on what is going on with you now. Often, friends can be a best resource for talking something through even in an email. I found that once I laid out my marital problems to a friend through email that it really helps to have gotten feedback from someone that knew us as a couple, how we lived, what we valued, who we really were. Also, self-diagnosing for something so serious is not a good idea, as we all know here, which is why everyone was encouraging you to get professional help. I continue to be concerned for your daughter also since this tension in the house with this going on has to be very disturbing for her and could, in my opinion, be causing or contributing to her behavior of hitting herself. Lacy, I have an issue or two with what David O. has said to me but he is very caring and concerned and has devoted a lot of his time and, I think, a piece of his heart and "picking on" someone is something he would never do and I am sorry you perceived him as doing so. I hope that soon you will be the happy young lady that I saw in the photos of you posted on the other websites - and be careful about putting your personal information on the internet as it is indeed a "web" of information. And just because you go to mental health clinic or end up in a hospital for mental health, well, that just means you are getting help for a problem and who cares what other people think when it comes to preserving your mental and physical health especially when you have a child who depends on you to be 100% or maybe actually 200%. I have great respect for people who seek help and especially for those on this forum who are open to discussing their situations and reliving the situations in their heads just to try to help someone else - the people here really put their hearts into this and are so open and caring. Cathy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David O Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Good morning Lacy,Lacy, my message to you on the main forum was that you seek help since you seem to be in great pain. It was not designed to push you to the edge. I'm sorry if it came across that way. I did not want you to replace conversations here with the real need to see someone.In my pm, I was beginning to question your symptoms--- so many in so many areas and most with such intensity that I was becoming concerned by the shear variety, and so I challenged you b/c it didn't seem possible that one person could list 8-9 phobias, severe anxiety, feelings of depression and dysthymia, significant issues with her daughter, issues at home and several other concerns. In my pm I stated what I would have told someone in my office, especially when new concrns surface at such a rapid rate. Sometimes folks are offended but I always try to be honest and up front, and I don't tend to sugarcoat as it often may not have therapeutic value. I'm so very sorry if this was hurtful, this was never my intent. I could also be very, very wrong, as I stated in my pm, and so I was extremely tentative and even questioning my observations when suggesting that your issues might be highly inconsistent. Lacy, when peeople present in so many areas and a new issues surfaces daily, then I begin to wonder (it's my paranoid side), not in an insensitive and cold manner, but in great concern that I might be missing something-- so I put it out there to see what the person has to say. I understand why you would be angry and hurt by my observation. Please do not let my comment keep you from seeking help here and elsewhere. In fact, it should drive you further into seeking to understand where these issues are coming from.Lacy, I think it would be best if others helped you at this point. My sense is that my posts may result in you not trusting others on the site and thereby you will leave at the point when you may most need support and encouragement. Best regards,david Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lacyjay87 Posted November 24, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Lacy: I am sorry that all of this has upset you. I wonder when all of this began. well when i was younger around 15 i had to move to KY with my family and that was so not for me i was depressed then, but it all really really started when I turned 20...which is when I got married, but i love my hubby i really do Did you have a good life before you moved to the little town where maybe it doesn't suit you at all.i had a good life when i only had to take care of me I saw that you are a member of both Facebook and Classmates and it seems that a lot must have changed quickly in your life. Since you listed MentalHelp as one of your connections on Facebook, I am wondering if any of your friends may have picked up on what is going on with you now.yes i just recently added mentalhelpnet on my facebook...but no i dont have any close friends they are all in ohio, and these people here where i live i could never talk to them about this stuff Often, friends can be a best resource for talking something through even in an email.maybe i should write to my friends in ohio about all this I found that once I laid out my marital problems to a friend through email that it really helps to have gotten feedback from someone that knew us as a couple, how we lived, what we valued, who we really were. Also, self-diagnosing for something so serious is not a good idea, as we all know here, which is why everyone was encouraging you to get professional help.i tried to last night but i hung up bc i dont thinki was supposed to call a hotline and had no idea what to say... I continue to be concerned for your daughter also since this tension in the house with this going on has to be very disturbing for her and could, in my opinion, be causing or contributing to her behavior of hitting herself. thast the thing i dont show my emotions on my face or in my words i show them on paper and in the computer...im a pretty normal person with a lot of hidden issus that im alowing you all to see im so good at hiding it that my mom thinks i dont need counsoling but thats bc i dont want to hurt her or make her feel bad for me so i keep it to my self Lacy, I have an issue or two with what David O. has said to me but he is very caring and concerned and has devoted a lot of his time and, I think, a piece of his heart and "picking on" someone is something he would never do and I am sorry you perceived him as doing so. yea me too me and him have worked it out...he just thought i was faking all this and im not and that why i said i thought he was picking on me I hope that soon you will be the happy young lady that I saw in the photos of you posted on the other websites - and be careful about putting your personal information on the internet as it is indeed a "web" of information. ty i totaly fixed all my stuff on this site but i have not done so ye tonmyspace or face book And just because you go to mental health clinic or end up in a hospital for mental health, well, that just means you are getting help for a problem and who cares what other people think when it comes to preserving your mental and physical health especially when you have a child who depends on you to be 100% or maybe actually 200%. I have great respect for people who seek help and especially for those on this forum who are open to discussing their situations and reliving the situations in their heads just to try to help someone else - the people here really put their hearts into this and are so open and caring. i know that...and thank yall..Cathythanks for the post! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lacyjay87 Posted November 24, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Good morning Lacy,Lacy, my message to you on the main forum was that you seek help since you seem to be in great pain.hidden pain all hidden but i shared it all with everyone here bc i trusted and still trust all of you..i called a hotline but hung up bc i dont think it was the right place or time It was not designed to push you to the edge. I'm sorry if it came across that way. I did not want you to replace conversations here with the real need to see someone.i did not want to see anyone bc i figured they wopuld not believe me people have been not believeing me my whole life, but God gave me a gift it was a gift of honesty, great love and caring.In my pm, I was beginning to question your symptoms--- so many in so many areas and most with such intensity that I was becoming concerned by the shear variety, and so I challenged you b/c it didn't seem possible that one person could list 8-9 phobiasi am scared of all that stuff..i can still function in some of it but it still scares me maybe it is only a phobia when you cannot 100% cannot be around it..for example the crowd phobia i get chest pains and feel like i cant breath but istill have to go in crowds of people daily...im not saying oh i can never go in a crowd of people, severe anxietyi never stated it was sever...i never even stated that i had it often...i do have anxiety attacks or what feels like one every now and then...i have not had one in a long time like 5 months, feelings of depression and dysthymiai never said i had dysthynmia i was only posting information about it for those who do have problems with it..., significant issues with her daughter,it was a few lil issues that donna helped me fix she was acting out so donna told me to distract her from it so i the only one she still does is the gagging thing but she will ge tover it too issues at home and several other concerns. In my pm I stated what I would have told someone in my office, especially when new concrns surface at such a rapid rate.for you and this fourm it is new concerns for me it is the same old concerns i have been holding on to for a long time...i just figured if there was anyplace at all to let your emotions out this site would be the perfect place Sometimes folks are offended but I always try to be honest and up front,as do i and I don't tend to sugarcoat as it often may not have therapeutic value. I'm so very sorry if this was hurtful,i accept your appology this was never my intent. I could also be very, very wrong, as I stated in my pm, and so I was extremely tentative and even questioning my observations when suggesting that your issues might be highly inconsistent. Lacy, when peeople present in so many areas and a new issues surfaces daily,ne wissues to you all not to me they are old and have always been there well not always but for a while maybe 2 years or more then I begin to wonder (it's my paranoid side), not in an insensitive and cold manner, but in great concern that I might be missing something-- so I put it out there to see what the person has to say. I understand why you would be angry and hurt by my observation. Please do not let my comment keep you from seeking help here and elsewhere. In fact, it should drive you further into seeking to understand where these issues are coming from.Here is the thing your like this really cool guy how gives advice and helps people and you have your own office..if you dont believe me than how will anyone else....thats why it is not driving me to seek help..i am embarrassed that you dont believe me and i will not further my embarrassment i feellike a goof ball i feel like all the things i have felt for so long are fake and now instead of feeling depressed i feel like im going nuts like im the only one who will ever believe a thing i say..i duno[/Lacy, I think it would be best if others helped you at this point. My sense is that my posts may result in you not trusting others on the site and thereby you will leave at the point when you may most need support and encouragement. i feel like i want to stop writing on this site all together but for some reason i cant...i need to write what i feel bc at least somone will be hereing me and reading what im writing and thoes who are not mad at me will still give me hope by writng me back and encourageing me...Best regards,davidim sorry too david we both hurt each other...you did it by accident i did it with angry words...we are boith wrong and both sorry...i forgive you i hope you can forgive me i really hope we can still be firends. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ASchwartz Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Hi Lacy,Why do you seem to believe that others will not believe you? Can you clarify for me? I may have missed something in the forum and about you. Let me try to assure you that, in my long experience, therapists believe what their clients say unless they are incompetent. I cannot imagine a therapist not believing what you say. I believe you. Why shouldn't I?Allan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest GingerSnap Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Lacy: You need to be patient a minute with me and don't get mad but I want to explain what I saw happening. Most people coming into the forum have a main issue in their introduction. Sometimes the introduction is long and encompasses several issues but usually there appears to be a clear issue even for me and I don't know that much about mental health. These kinds of posts make it easy to kind of wrap your mind around what is happening and give some direction or maybe ask some questions to help clarify. In your case, you came in with the minor issues with your daughter and once you got to post in the other area of the forum, it was like a wild fire and even I couldn't keep up with it and couldn't remember where the post was that I read without endlessly searching to locate it if I had a thought that I wanted to post. Some things didn't appear to "mesh". This is how I would relate the story from bites and pieces: A happily married young lady was concerned about some behaviors of her one year old. Then, she was concerned about a lack of interest in sex with her husband and thought because she found lesbian porn turned her on that she might be a lesbian (well, when I read that I thought that I think there is a whole lot more to being a lesbian then discovering it watching porn?). Then, there were the phobias and I am confused about not wanting to go out since it appears you have friends you visit, enjoyed going to the movies and go to Curves and even Curves threw me for a loop because you said money was an issue and the town had nothing. Your Facebook painted you as someone that is just "bored" with your life and personally I think that is where a lot of your problems are stemming from, keeping in mind I don't know about psychological theories, etc., you seem to have a problem transitioning from being young and free to being married, a mom (although rewarding in its own way, it is not a party) stuck in a place that is undesirable (I can identify with this). Another issue is that you were on medication for depression? I guess that was what the medication was for that you took before you had the baby? So, if you were on medication previously, I am wondering why you didn't resume that treatment after the birth of your baby. I've addressed everything I could think of. No one is mad at you for heaven's sake. So, it was like a wild fire and I was just shaking my head too. We received a lot of fragments and couldn't weave them into the story of Lacy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lacyjay87 Posted November 24, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Lacy: You need to be patient a minute with me and don't get mad but I want to explain what I saw happening. Most people coming into the forum have a main issue in their introduction. Sometimes the introduction is long and encompasses several issues but usually there appears to be a clear issue even for me and I don't know that much about mental health. These kinds of posts make it easy to kind of wrap your mind around what is happening and give some direction or maybe ask some questions to help clarify.most of my post have to do with some kind of depression symptom..so depression is my major malfunction...being lonley sad bored loss of intreast in things, feeling guilty, they are all part of derpression...weight gain...never wanting to do anything depression...sex issues with my hubby probably stream from the sexual abue and weight gain and the weight came from the depression bc i am an emotional eater..so basicaly sex issues and depression are what all my stuf fis about....i worte a blog that has been deleted about going to the movies 2 times in a row and that that was the most i had done in so long and how good it felt to do yet...when i came home i was back to me sad and lonley and the next day i did not want to do anything at allCOLOR] In your case, you came in with the minor issues with your daughteryea i came in to talk about my daughter bc she is my main priority i thought you all could tell me is she was ok and well she is a donna told me to distracte her from the behavior and it worked and once you got to post in the other area of the forum, it was like a wild fire of course bc i have issues when you dont talk about your feelings and or emotions hardly ever...and one day you find people that you think will understand you..you get brave and let it all out......and well its not a good idea to do i guess...i think i have confused alot of people..if you all felt this way i wish yall woul dhave told me in the begining LOL....it would have save alot of time...lol..im not being mean im actually giggling a lil that everyone thinks im crazy.....lol bc i have so many issues...loland even I couldn't keep up with it and couldn't remember where the post was that I read without endlessly searching to locate it if I had a thought that I wanted to post. Some things didn't appear to "mesh". This is how I would relate the story from bites and pieces: A happily married young lady was concerned about some behaviors of her one year old. Then, she was concerned about a lack of interest in sex with her husband and thought because she found lesbian porn turned her on that she might be a lesbian (well, when I read that I thought that I think there is a whole lot more to being a lesbian then discovering it watching porn?). Then, there were the phobias and I am confused about not wanting to go out since it appears you have friends you visit, enjoyed going to the moviesi have been out 3 times with friends in the past whole month...2 of the times were straight in a row...i never said i could not leave my home i said i dont want to ...i ussually feel like im bored and i wanna do something but then whenit comes to doing it i dont want to but if i go ahead and make my self it usually turns out to be an ok time an di do have a lil fun...i guess its a motivation problem..i feel safe at home...if pople would come over here and i was rich enough to have a maide and all that i would never leave lol...i hate leaving the house...im usually at home and go to Curves and even Curves threw me for a loop because you said money was an issue and the town had nothing.the town doesnt have anything..look it up on the map..West Liberty Ky its a shit hole..lol...the hang out spot is the car wash there is a movie theater that hold like 50 people a police sation a small park and a rankeydank curves lol I was told by a doc that i had to take care of my weight b/c it was an issue and that i was basicaly killing my self and seting my self up for future problems....they told me i had PCOS...before they actually had the results....then when they got them weeks later thaty said i was fine...and curves only cost me 1 dollar day its 29.99 a month...1 dollar towards my health i thought was a pretty good deal i cant afford 10 bucks a day for me to go share my thoughts with a counsoler to have him judge me..lol...Your Facebook painted you as someone that is just "bored" with your life and personally I think that is where a lot of your problems are stemming from,um yea thats what i think bored with my life...nothing is fun or exciting anymore.. keeping in mind I don't know about psychological theories, etc., you seem to have a problem transitioning from being young and free to being married, a mom (although rewarding in its own way, it is not a party)correct stuck in a place that is undesirable (I can identify with this).oh yea it is very boring here...if you are going to go shopping for grocerys and u need to go to walmart you have to go 40 min away lol Another issue is that you were on medication for depression?yea I guess that was what the medication was for that you took before you had the baby?no i had to be put on it after i had my daughter So, if you were on medication previously, I am wondering why you didn't resume that treatment after the birth of your baby.i got the meds after i had my daughter..i told the doc he gave me meds the meds made me worse i was on them for a few months not exactly sure how many..he took me off and that was that..never another mention of it I've addressed everything I could think of. No one is mad at you for heaven's sake.k So, it was like a wild fire and I was just shaking my head too.i shake my head at some things i read on here to We received a lot of fragments and couldn't weave them into the story of Lacy.now everyone knows my storyim in pink!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malign Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Lacy, it's not that you're not allowed to have lots of problems, or that you shouldn't share them. It's just overwhelming, in some ways, but don't worry, we'll catch up. It's just easier, for you and for us, if you can use the priority system David suggested, so that you don't have to try to deal with everything all at once. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lacyjay87 Posted November 24, 2009 Author Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 Lacy, it's not that you're not allowed to have lots of problems, or that you shouldn't share them. It's just overwhelming, in some ways, but don't worry, we'll catch up. It's just easier, for you and for us, if you can use the priority system David suggested, so that you don't have to try to deal with everything all at once.you were so kind in your words to me and you explained it to me so well...thank you for not yelling at me or becoming frustrated with me i appreciate it very much! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David O Posted November 24, 2009 Report Share Posted November 24, 2009 im sorry too david we both hurt each other...you did it by accident i did it with angry words...we are boith wrong and both sorry...i forgive you i hope you can forgive me i really hope we can still be firends.Lacy,There is nothing you did for you to be forgiven for, thank you so much for your sensitivity on this one. I should be the one asking forgiveness!!David Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IrmaJean Posted November 25, 2009 Report Share Posted November 25, 2009 I think that if you take a look at behaviors they can really be informative. What has taken place here, Lacy, could be meaningful in its own way. I have a strong impression that you want to be heard and noticed. Maybe this has been denied to you in the past and so you tried extra hard. We're here for you and you're an important part of the community. We're here to listen and support you. I hope you find a good therapist soon who can help you with your difficulties. I sense a certain exhuberance and energy from within your posts. It's really quite refreshing. Take care, Lacy.Beth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.