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Virtuous Circle


Ralph

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Made it through two weekends now without drinking. Trying to quit porn at the same time. Realizing I have a sex addiction. Dammit I get addicted to anything I touch it seems. Actually not everything. Just opiates, alcohol, and sex in general. Looking forward to getting ADHD meds but I'm aware there is a risk of addiction with those too. I can't say it won't happen. Then again my pdoc is aware I had alcohol issues in the past and may refuse to prescribe stims. Or I may grow some self control by the time I see him and have no problem. That is really the ideal. To not have alcohol messing with my meds and the proper combo for my condition. It's taken so long to get this far. It would be nice to be stable for a bit. I've made it over 60 days before, hoping I can do it again and then some. Or at least get to Easter then I could say I gave up alcohol for Lent (minus two days).

I feel better. Since leaving off the booze I have noticed that I want to improve other areas of my life. Not only trying to quit porn but also caring more about myself and my surroundings. Feeling like things in life are important. Wanting to lose weight and eat better. Having better interactions with my meditation group. I still feel depressed at times but overall things appear to be looking up. Maybe this is what normal is.

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Maybe the trick to not getting hooked (or rather, to not ending up overusing) would be to explicitly make a contract with someone (med provider, maybe) to monitor your consumption?

I'm glad you're feeling better, Ralph. There does tend to be positive feedback in these things; I think at least part of us knows what healthy is and guides us that way. It's just hard to hear, sometimes.

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