I stumbled across an old blog from July 2012 that I wrote. I had to re read it because I could have written it yesterday. I thought I started in February this year, turns out it was longer ago than that. Still struggling to stay sober, still a lot of depression around loneliness and where I've ended up in life. Not getting anywhere in over a year. I need to change something, but I'm not sure what.
I've identified that I am both mad at my father for leaving me, and mad at myself for being basically a failure at life. I'm not sure how else to put it. I want to live, but not like this.