Everything's horrible today. Yesterday wasn't so bad and everything felt ok and nearly normal. I keep hearing noises and seeing things moving that shouldn't be moving and it's really freaking me out. I don't think I'm gonna be able to sleep tonight. I woke up screaming last night because my door opened on it's own - dunno whether it was a dream or not. I think I'm going crazy.. I don't know whether these things are actually happening or not. I hate this feeling. and I know that everyone else in the house will be asleep soon and it'll be just me awake again and then I'll start hearing noises again and get paranoid. And I know it's gonna be like this for ages because this is the way I get whenever anyone dies - I think it's my weird way of grieving - My family are going on a 2 week holiday soon and I'm meant to be staying at home on my own and I know I sound like a wuss but I so don't want to be home alone right now, especially not at night time. It's gonna be so scary. I feel really anxious.But it's getting easier to talk about how I feel here.