I'm sorry things are so difficult, Ralph.   It's always okay to reach out if you need to. Are you feeling any better now? I'm glad to see your blog is back up.

I'm so relieved to see your blog again! Glad you made it through the site change.

How are things?

Thanks for the note, IJ. It took me a little while but I found the settings. I'm still feeling about the same as when I wrote the original post unfortunately. Things are pretty good; I have a lot to be thankful for. I can't seem to be able to enjoy my own good fortune, though. I feel so much fear and pessimism although things have gone pretty well for me, with a few significant exceptions.

I think I know the mindset you are referring to Ralph. I distrust new good things too.  I try to just give myself that and eventually it falls away. 

Thinking of you, Ralph... (Quite often, although I don't post here.)

Good luck!

I'm glad you found the settings, Ralph. I'm sorry you're still struggling.

I struggle with anxiety at times myself. I think it's often about my fear of the future and what might happen and will I be able to cope if it does? Whenever this happens, I try to slow down my mind by connecting with my state of being in the present. I will sit in a quiet place and listen to the sound of my breathing... feel the life in me from within, focus on the sounds, the physical sensations... gain a greater awareness of self. Sometimes I may sit with painful feelings. I think practicing this during the difficult times helps me to be more aware of the joyful moments too without fear of the future. I don't know if any of this could be helpful to you, but it seems to help me.

Wishing you peaceful moments.