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blossom is a waste of space.


Blossom

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i'm so confused. why can't i ever feel happy? i really did try to be happy and to have fun tonight but it only worked for a little while... it only ever works when i'm drunk. then when that wears off i'm screwed. i tried to be positive but i couldn't. nothing makes me happy anymore. i have no control over it. it just happens. what am i supposed to do? i feel like a lost cause. nothing will ever change. i know that. i feel like a loser. i don't think anyone likes me. i don't blame them. i wish i wasn't alive. i wish my feelings could be taken away. :rolleyes: i feel like i have no options left. i don't matter because my life is a waste. everyone probably just feels sorry for me because i'm a loser and that's why they talk to me.

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hi blossom

sorry youre feeling so crapppy tonight ,

we all like you, we think the world of you hun, you are not a waste of space and neither is your life.

was the party realy that sucky hun.

im still on line for a while if you want to talk

take care

your friend, one of many here

sue

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hey blossom, sorry you had a crappy night :(

I just wanted to mention a little something about the alcohol. From my experience, being depressed and drinking just don't go well. At first yeah it's great, but as you know at the end you wind up feeling pretty depressed. I mean sufficiently more than before you started drinking. I always end up an absolute wreck when I get drunk, don't even want to say how it leaves me. They say alcohol is a depressant, right? So at first you feel great, invincible but eventually you have to stop drinking and for whatever reason it leaves you so much further down than when you started. I don't know, I'm just thinking it might be a good idea to not drink when you're already feeling depressed cause you know it won't really help.

Anyway, you really aren't a waste of space. I don't talk to you cause I feel sorry for you, I talk to you cause you're my friend, I care about you. Besides that you're nice to me and make me laugh even when I think nothing could make me laugh.

Well, I hope you feel better tomorrow and have a good day.

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thanks star

i don't know why i bother to drink it. the same thing happens everytime. it's stupid. but i'm a nobody if i don't drink.

i so don't want to go to college. today is art history day..:(

i wish i could disappear.

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hey blossom,

have you ever thought about group therapy, or doing art therapy, or even music therapy, not all therapy needs to be frightening or even scarey, sometimes it can be a little fun too. just a thought.

hope your ok today hun , and feeling a little happier

take care

Jj

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Yeah.

What did you need her in there for, again? :-P

This is your brain. ("This is your brain on YKW." Sorry, I couldn't resist.)

It's your own private club. You don't have to let anyone in that you don't want. It's sound-proof, even. You don't have to hear a single thing that goes on outside, if you don't want to.

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'Course you're afraid of that.

It's not happening yet, if it ever will: you're talking to yourself, not others.

In fact, my guess is that the most damaging thing might be that you'll end up spending all your time trying not to be her, and you might forget to be you.

That's what the therapy would be for, to get past all the stuff that's been said about who you are, and get to the person who's actually in there. I can assure you that she's pretty amazing. Because somewhere inside, we all are amazing, even YKW. It's all the stuff we put on over that beauty, to try to protect ourselves ...

Go meet yourself, please, little one, and then see if there's anything to be worried about.

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When you breathe deeply and close your eyes, and all the thoughts melt away, and you feel peace and quiet, that's you.

That's just one way, that I know, and I'm not that skillful yet at going to the next step, of letting myself make the decisions, but it gives me faith to know I'm always there.

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