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when i was little i wasn't allowed to cry because it was bad. even if ykw was after hitting me or saying mean things to me it was still wrong to cry. if i did cry she would call me more names and make me feel worse and that would make me cry even more and she would get even madder at me and send me to my room. because i was bad.

she always pretends to be nice to me in front of other people and i have to pretend to be happy so that noone will think bad things about us. we need to make everyone think that we're a perfect family. everything has to be perfect. except my perfect is never good enough:(


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i wish i knew why she hates me so much.

i don't know what i've done wrong but maybe i can fix it?

maybe i can change so that she won't hate me so much.

i'm sorry i'm not perfect enough:(

i'll try harder but that probably won't be good enough either.

i'm sorry. i don't mean to be an embarrassment. i wish i didn't make you look bad and i wish i wasn't such a big disappointment.

i'm sorry that i've messed up your life so much. i didn't mean to be bad. if i could i'd disappear and then everyone could have peace again and everyone might be happier.

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she says i'm good for nothing and i'm stupid and a waste of time and fat and ugly and she wants me to disappear. she wishes she never had to see my ugly face again. i'm always in the way. i'm sorry. she calls me "her" instead of by my name and she never talks directly to me. she just talks about me when she knows i'm listening. i wish i could fix it.

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There is nothing that is OK about this treatment, and nothing that about it that you should get used to.:mad: I know this is what you have known all your life, but you need to know that it is wrong, OK? I'm so sorry you are in this situation.:(:(

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ANYTHING that breaks her spell will save you sweetie!

All you have to do is create a teensy space inside your situation, and let it be real and let it grow.

Without it, you are totally washed away into the dominance of your mother's ways.

SHE IS WRONG, and we will help you in any way we can to shake you out of that trance. These boys are looking out from their photo, and they don't believe your moma for one darn second.

Do you see what I mean?????

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That is how she's got you. You doubt yourself and turn against yourself and she gets to put all her mean stuff into you.

Sweetie, this is all so crazy! For the sake of argument, let's take a family where the daughter is overweight and not conventionally beautiful and not quick witted. I work with children that would fit that category. Would a real loving, caring mother get down on her daughter for any of those things? NO! She would love her daughter and care for her and they would have good times together!!!! Her argument to you makes no sense at all. She is not being a loving mother, she is being mean, and she is wrapping you in confusion to take you down, [and it is making me flippin' mad:mad::mad:]

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