how do you know?

i don't get why i can't just do this | i'm so frustrated i could bang my head off the wall right now

I don't think that would help you paint blossom

nothing will help |

i think i've made a huge mistake.

what did you do?

art college:O(

So, um, if art college doesn't work out, and you end up doing something else ... how does that make it a mistake?

You had to try something, you did, and you will have found out whether it worked for you or not. Only a perfect person could succeed at everything they ever tried.

And all of that assumes that this isn't just a temporary artist's block (you've had them before), and that everything won't be just fine tomorrow, maybe.

You're not only thinking ahead, you're worrying ahead, and you're letting it stop you from doing what you have to, now. You aren't required to do that. :-)

noone gets it.

Well, if I'm included in the "no one", I'm happy to keep trying?

If yer saying the people around you at home and school don't get you or support you, that makes sense...

I'm sorry for your sorrow, blossomy

If Van Gogh had been a bunny! :-)

But then it would have been an even bigger sacrifice, losing an ear ...

Well, and Blossomy, something I learned just yesterday:

Sometimes my understanding is a lot less important than my caring that someone hurts.

And I do care that you're having a hard time. I'm sorry.

thanks finding.

uh huh marky.

don't know what to do.

thanks marky. sorry i'm a pain.

Yer not a pain, sweety. Yer a sweety. :-)

Well, I don't know what to do right now, either.

Can we try to break it into one decision at a time?

i can't say what i need to say. i could pull my eyes out right now.

there are no decisions. i just need to paint.

You certainly could pull your eyes out.

However, I can't see (and neither could you) how that could possibly help you, in this situation.

Then you do know what to do, just not how to do it. :-)

yeah....................

So, who's stopping you from painting?

Perhaps you could explain to her that you respect her needs, but right now, you need to paint for a while. You'll talk to her about her concerns when you're finished.

i don't know. i have been trying to paint. i started a painting. but i can't paint the way i used to and i keep freezing up and getting panickey.

Lady bloooossssooommmmmmm!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'll do yer painting for ye!!!!!!!!!!

Sweety, I meant that some other part of you is stopping you from painting.

She gets to thinking about everything that's at stake, and starts to criticise your work, and then you start to panic.

There's nothing to panic about: it's just a painting. It's not your future and all your dreams and your biggest failure or any of the other stuff you're telling yourself. It's just a painting. I know you can do it.