Athena Posted September 28, 2011 Report Share Posted September 28, 2011 I haven't been on here much, but still around. Talk about right back into work World. Lots of Hours & Overtime. Just wish Pay was better & Not so Physical. Wearing this Middle Age Man Down A Bit.Sincerely; Jim Perhaps you are a bit like me and in denial about what you can and can't do at 50+. Take some time to think about how you are doing things and how to alter them now that you are older. Do you need to stretch at the beginning/end of every day? Are there exercises you can do to reduce the chance of injury? (I try to do stretching and strength exercises for my core/back/arms/legs every day or two or it's almost guaranteed I will get injured even just doing activities of daily living, and especially if I'm moving furniture or boxes around). Do you need to get a better sleep? (restorative sleep is very important for the muscles). A tennis ball or foam roller is also good to work out trigger points that set up in muscles. Best to get at these before it gets chronic. Sorry you're hurting. I dread going back to work for that very reason. But I allowed my pain to get disabling before I dealt with it.BTW, you are actually sounding a little better, maybe the distraction of work is helping a bit? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
58corvette Posted September 29, 2011 Author Report Share Posted September 29, 2011 Dear Miss Athena; Thank You For Your reply & Thoughts of me doing a bit better. I Am doing somewhat better in Certain Aspects.I work with a Bunch of 20-30yr. Olds & Outwork All of them. There is Another Guy My Age & We Work Well Together. The "KIDS" Don't Like to do The Physical Stuff. A Bit Lazy & Spoiled I Think.We Do Exercises before we start work. It Helps. But Working 10Hr. 6 day Weeks with A Little Drive Can Wear The Best Of Us Down. Especially Doing the Physical Work I Do. Just feel it A Lot More in My 50's than I did in 20s-40s.The Bed I Sleep On is Bad For Sure. But it's the Best I Can Do For Now & At Least for Now it's Still Better than Streets.My Daughter's Boyfriends Back Today After Being Out Of Town For Close To Two Weeks; So That Was Nice. Just Don't Care For The Dude. Nothing in Common & As I Said he has it Made In The Shade With My Daughter Who Waits Hand & Foot Over This Guy. She's A Good Hard Working Young Lady But She Is BLIND To This Guy & His Intent I Believe.My Oldest Son Is Doing Better.......... : ) Hopefully He Continues To Improve & Be What He Is Capable Of Being............... My Twin Son Continues To Be A Good, Decent, Caring Reliable Young Man As Well. Helped Me Out A Lot Recently..........As Far As Physical Work I Have Done it Most Of My Life & have Paid The Price Over The Years. Bad Back For 5yrs. With Three MRIs, 7 Cortisone Shots One Year On Vicodin & 4yrs On Celebrex. Than As I Was Being Careful With That I Suffered A Double Hernia & Had To Have Surgery For That As Well. Suffered A Burn While I Was A Furnace Operator That Required Surgery On My Nose & That Has Never Been The Same.Than When Working Casino It Was Suggested I Get A Colonoscopy Following A Month & Half Of Sickness & Into ER. Than While I was In Hotel Room Living With Son Recently I Had The Problem Of Front & They Suggested I See A Urologist. Never Did.So I Have Had My Share Of Physical Mishaps. But Still In Pretty Good Shape I Think. Despite It All.Well That's About it For Now. Athena How Are You Dear Lady???Sincerely; Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athena Posted September 29, 2011 Report Share Posted September 29, 2011 Well That's About it For Now. Athena How Are You Dear Lady???Sincerely; Jim Well, after reading about your physical ailments, I think I'll stop complaining about mine for a while . At this particular moment I am doing fine. Saturday night I was on top of the world. Sunday I was suicidal. So all in all, pretty much par for the course. Same ol' same ol'. Not many of the external uncontollable disasters have been resolved but I am starting to react a little less to them. A wonderful therapist and a very nice friend 'R' in my life right now. Periodically I throw a lot of SH-T at them and expect them to high-tail it out of my presence but they keep coming back for more. Nice to have a couple of friendly masochists in my life :eek: to help me through my crises. I am completely incapable of any normal human relationship. At least now I have a couple that are perhaps bizarre and quirky and not normal at all but stuff is at least getting worked through and perhaps I will come out the other side fit for human consumption. I just hope that I don't hurt them along the way. I have given them ample warning and left the door wide open. Neither is walking through. I am very grateful for both of them. A lifetime of isolation plus an abusive spouse does not make for a very well-adjusted person. But a little support and encouragement, even if one has had to wait 49 years for it - works wonders. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
58corvette Posted October 2, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 2, 2011 Sounds Good Athena..........Glad To Hear Things Are Better...And You Have A Few People You Can Consult With........Time Does Help With Certain Issues.Worked A Lot Of Hours Again This Past Week. A Little Worried About My Back Holding Up. Don't Want To Go Through Those Back Problems EVER Again. But As I Said It Is Very Physical Work I'm Doing & I Need To Continue To Hold My Own To SURVIVE.I Just Wrote My Twin Son & Want To Try To Get Together With My Two Sons On Sundays Maybe On A Weekly Basis & Just Hang Out, Enjoy Life & Get Away From My Daughters Boyfriend..........Maybe????? I Will Also Try To Figure Out A Place Where I Can Start Meeting Women As Well..........I Want & Yearn For That Special Companionship Of Something Missing In My Life.......................Take Care; Sincerely Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athena Posted October 2, 2011 Report Share Posted October 2, 2011 I Just Wrote My Twin Son & Want To Try To Get Together With My Two Sons On Sundays Maybe On A Weekly Basis & Just Hang Out, Enjoy Life & Get Away From My Daughters Boyfriend.......... Absolutely - you need this!Maybe????? I Will Also Try To Figure Out A Place Where I Can Start Meeting Women As Well..........I Want & Yearn For That Special Companionship Of Something Missing In My Life....................... Sounds like you are ready to move on. A little advice, for what it's worth (speaking from personal experience, so take it with a grain of salt) - Don't expect too much of yourself or others. Take it one day at a time. Take it s-l-o-w. Just enjoy another's company. Don't think about the future too much just yet. And TRY not to relive the past.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
58corvette Posted October 3, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 3, 2011 Miss Athena; Believe Me After 8yrs. On My Own & Single I Dont Relive The Past...As Far As Relationships Go............And Although I Have Tendencies Still To Expect A Little More From Myself Than I Should At Times;......... With What I Have Been Through With Others, Ex, Son, Family & Friends I Know Better Than To Expect To Much. Only Sets Ya Up For A Letdown.If Anything Im Quick To Observe, See What & Whom Their All About & Let Them Go Before It Goes Farther Than It Should................When It Just Isn't Right.However that Doesn't Mean Im Not Human & A Man With Typical, Normal Feelings & Desires.As Far As The Future I Continue To Take It One Day At A Time Knowing At Anytime Im Still At The Doorstep Of Homelessness. Especially Since My Daughter's Boyfriend Just Lost His Job. So I Have Already Spent Much Of The Money I Have Earned To Help Out Around Here, Keep Gas in My Van & Insured Just To Go To Work..........If I Take It Any Slower Believe Me I Would Lose To The Turtle In A Race....But As Always Thank You For Remaining & Offering Advice On This Post Athena & I Truly Hope THINGS In General Continue To Go As Well For You As Possible..........Sincerely; Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athena Posted October 3, 2011 Report Share Posted October 3, 2011 If I Take It Any Slower Believe Me I Would Lose To The Turtle In A Race.... LOL! That was pretty funny. Actually, I meant take it slow once you are in a relationship, not getting to the relationship, as it would appear you are ready. Hope you find somebody nice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athena Posted October 3, 2011 Report Share Posted October 3, 2011 OK, so it's late, and I'm tired and so my brain is doing weird things like wondering why and how you manage to type every word with a capital letter at the beginning.....Care to indulge me? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Endlessnight Posted October 3, 2011 Report Share Posted October 3, 2011 Dear Jim, i'm sorry this has happened and I know how stressful it must be for you and your son right now. You have such an indomitable spirit in you though, I know you will be able to rise from the ashes, just like the phoenix you mentioned. Wishing you and your family well. Take care. M. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
58corvette Posted October 3, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 3, 2011 Dear M. Thank You So Much For Your Wishes. My Son & I Are Doing Better; Hope All Is Well With You As Well.My Dear Miss Athena; You Are Correct About Taking It Slow & Easy Once In A Relationship. And Nice Observation About My Capitalising Words. Twofold; Habit & It Helps Bring Attention To Myself & Those Reading...Right Now I'm Getting Ready For The Drive & Work..........Another Day....Hope All Is Well With EVERYONE. Take Care Sincerely; Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
58corvette Posted October 4, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 4, 2011 I Tried To Edit & Correct My Wording But Was Unable. When I Said it Helps Bring Attention To Myself. I Meant It Helps Me Highlight Words For My Own Personal Benefit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randomperson Posted October 7, 2011 Report Share Posted October 7, 2011 Just saying hello to everyone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
58corvette Posted October 8, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 8, 2011 Hello Random My Friend; Hope All Is Well............ Sincerely....Always......... Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
58corvette Posted October 9, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 9, 2011 Been Working Six Day Workweeks & Today Is My Day Off. My Oldest Son Is Now Working Again Himself & That Does My Heart & Soul GOOD As Well.That Is The Main Reason I Started This Personal Thread. My OLDEST SON. He Seems To Be On The Right Track & Slowly Becoming Himself Again.So I Am Now Trying To Make Sundays A Get Together With My Two Sons. Since I Live With My Twin Daughter Although I See Her Just A Little Bit Everyday I Just Cant Be Myself With Her As Long As Her Boyfriend Is Around & With Her ALL THE TIME. That's Fine; But He Does Have Control Over Her More Than She Is Willing To Admit, Understand Or Realise. Especially When It Comes To Her Own Family & Friends.So I Take It As It Is. My Two Sons On The Other Hand, Live Their Own Lives & Now That I Have Some Transportation & A Little Money Would Like To Enjoy My Free Time With Them & Just Get Away From My Daughters Boyfriend. Just Not Comfortable Around This Dude. Don't Trust Him Or His Intentions & As I Said Before Nothing In Common With Him..So I Will See If My Sons Are Able To Get Together With Me Today. If Not I Can Try To Figure Out How To Make Something Of My Day Away From Here... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athena Posted October 9, 2011 Report Share Posted October 9, 2011 Jim, I'm glad to hear about your oldest son. You and he have come a long way in the past few months. I hope you enjoy your day off:) and hope you can spend it with your kids. A healthy, loving relationship with one's children is just so incredibly important. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
58corvette Posted October 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 23, 2011 Athena;Thank You So Much. I Believe My Son & I Have & I Am Grateful For That. Were Both Working A Lot Of Hours & My Son Continues To Go In A Positive Direction.I Continue To Be At Peace With All My Children & I Feel Blessed & Thankful For That.This Week I'm Working 7 Day 10hr. Shifts. No Time To Be Depressed Or Have Anxiety; To Tired...................Hope All Is Well With You & Everyone Else Who Has Replied To This Thread.Thank You, Sincerely; Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athena Posted October 23, 2011 Report Share Posted October 23, 2011 Are you working so hard for the extra money or because you are being pressured into it? Distraction works well until chronic pain sets in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randomperson Posted October 23, 2011 Report Share Posted October 23, 2011 Take care of yourself Jim. Remember to relax when you can. Hope everyone is well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
58corvette Posted October 24, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 24, 2011 Athena; Basically The Extra Money Is Helping Although The Pay Is Low. And If I Want To Keep This Job I Have To Work As Directed. So The Choice Is Work The Hours Or Find Another Job........Although I Am Tired & Could Use A Few Days Off, For Now I'm Dealing With The Aches & Pains. Comes With The Territory..............Random; Nice To Hear From You My Friend..I Relax Outside At Home When I Can...Taking Care The Best I Can & Everyone Is Doing OK. Thanks For Asking....I Hope All Is Well With You & Your World As Well....Sincerely; Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eppursimuove Posted October 24, 2011 Report Share Posted October 24, 2011 Im sorry but i didnt read al the pages just a couple of them, and Jim is ur name right? I wish my father was half the man u aré, I dont see him anywhere around. I hope everything gets better and u find a job that lets u rest a little more. I like to think that there ar different paths in life u sometimes or most of the times take wrong ones but once in a while find the right path, so im sure ur older son will be fine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
58corvette Posted October 25, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 25, 2011 eppursimuove; Thank You For Your Kind Words. Yes Jim Is My Name....Hopefully Someday Your Father Will Come Around.....I Believe After This Week Work Will Start Slowing Down A Bit & I Will Be Able To Get Some Extra Time To Relax, Enjoy My Children & Just Enjoy Life A Bit.I Hear Ya About The Paths We Take & Choose For Ourselves. I Try My Best To Live With A Good Conscience But Don't Always Make The Right Decisions Myself. As Far As My Oldest Son It Has Eased My Mind To See Him Slowly Coming Back Into His Own. Hopefully He Will Continue To Take & Choose The Right Path Himself..........You Take Care Yourself eppursimuove & The Best To You As Well.Sincerely; Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
58corvette Posted October 29, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 29, 2011 ;)Work Has Now Slowed Down A Bit & I Have Two Days Off....I Can Gather Myself A Bit; Maybe Get Some Things Done, Relax & Enjoy.But I Still Feel Like A Cave-Man Looking For Romance......No Offense To Any Ladies Here; It's Just One Of Those Things...Basic Needs Since I'm Still Alive & Kicking.........It Continues To Be That One Thing Missing In My Life Right Now.....Sometimes I Think About Places To Go & Meet Ladies.......Church Is A Great Spot From What I Hear All The Time........But I'm Not Much For Organized Religion.........Bowling Alley?????? Bar, Not Much Of A Drinker Although I Like To Have Fun & Enjoy A Few Drinks At Times; Especially With Good People & Company.........Where Do Women Go When Looking To Hook Up With A Man??????????? Any Of You LADIES Read This I Would Be Interested To Hear Your Input.........Now Ill Be Honest; I Feel I'm A Decent Looking Guy & A Woman's Looks Are Important To Me As Well......I Know A Lot Of Women Don't Want To Hear That But Hey Be Honest With Yourself As Well. A Man's Looks & How He Carries Himself Are Important To You As Well..............Yes I Have Been On Internet Dating Sites As Well.........Nothing Yet..........This Is A Mental Health Site.........But We Are Human With Needs & Desires To..................So Let's Have Fun At Times Here, Relax, Open Our Minds & Be Honest.......Men & Women Dont Always Understand One Another For A Variety Of Reasons. I Just Want To Hear, Listen & Read You LADIES Imput. BE HONEST & OPEN MINDED.You All Have A Great Day; In The Meantime Im Just Going To Try To Enjoy My Time Off.Sincerely; Jim.................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athena Posted October 29, 2011 Report Share Posted October 29, 2011 It Continues To Be That One Thing Missing In My Life Right Now.....Sometimes I Think About Places To Go & Meet Ladies.......Church Is A Great Spot From What I Hear All The Time........But I'm Not Much For Organized Religion.........Bowling Alley?????? Bar, Not Much Of A Drinker Although I Like To Have Fun & Enjoy A Few Drinks At Times; Especially With Good People & Company......... How about an alternative religion like Buddhism or Taoism? They seem to be much more in sync with what people need spiritually than traditional North American christian based organized religions. I don't know how they organize themselves but it might be worth looking into.Where Do Women Go When Looking To Hook Up With A Man??????????? Any Of You LADIES Read This I Would Be Interested To Hear Your Input.........Yes I Have Been On Internet Dating Sites As Well.........Nothing Yet..........This Is A Mental Health Site.........But We Are Human With Needs & Desires To.................. I just try to get out and do activities that involve other people. I went to a jam session at a bar last week. Basically a host band plays and other budding musicians are invited up to jam with them or do their own thing. These tend to be on non-prime-time nights, like through the week or on a Sunday. The crowd that showed up was 40's - 60's and the music played was 60's to 80's. Although I went on my own, I wasn't looking to find a guy there. I did however notice a lot of singles there, both genders. And it was a lot of fun and more of a community/welcoming feel to it than a modern bar. So it would seem a decent option for somebody looking.... As far as Internet Dating Sites go, there are so many things that have to go right. 1)Enough eligible women in your town, 2)Ability to take a decent picture of yourself, 3)Compelling, positive writeup, 4)Ability to banter/flirt/have fun or whatever through electronic means 5) Getting the age range right for you. FYI: guys age 45 - 60 are looking for women age 30-50. Just being open to dating a woman over 50 would increase your odds. But then again, don't expect them to look like they're 30! Try not to get so hung up on looks. I know, 20 pictures flash across the screen, you're gonna pick the really attractive ones. Stop and look at the writeups for tier 2 ladies. I can't take a good picture for the life of me. Well, maybe I have one:o now but it took about 30 takes. The comments I get in person these days (thankfully, quite flattering) just don't jibe with being ignored on the dating site. But then again, it could be my writeup that was the problem. A guy who thought I'd rejected him offered to critique my writeup. Then he proceeded to tear it to shreds. He warned me he'd be blunt. Scary thing is - he was right on with most of his comments :eek:.I suggest you send a pic and writeup to somebody you trust to give you some feedback. Somebody just posted their writeup here a week or two ago and got some feedback from the community. That's not a bad option either as you'll get several viewpoints. Something is fundamentally wrong if you are getting no hits. Could also be the site. I keep hearing of people having success on the dating sites. The most recent one mentioned was eHarmony. He's a great guy and I said, it must be hard given that you're in a relatively small town. He said "Yes, I had to go farther afield". He is now seeing a lady from a big city an hour south of where he lives, one with over 6 million people.I wish you the best with this Jim. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
58corvette Posted October 29, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 29, 2011 Very Interesting Athena......Thanx For The Imput.The Very Best To You As Well.........Sincerely; Jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
randomperson Posted November 2, 2011 Report Share Posted November 2, 2011 I have tried all types of dating sites with no real success. Trying another right now. Like Athena mentioned too many htings have to be just right unless your a super model of either gender or know the perfect words to say. Most have some sort of catch. Either loaded with scammers, people are stuck up, not enough people in your area.. always something.Like you I find it hard to meet women. Not really anywhere to go. Bars are not my style. Church I hear often myself.. but personally I don't see it. You go for the service then say a few words and leave, extra activities the church plans..maybe. I don't know. Seems way to hard to find someone this day in time. When I do try I normally get rejected or more than often just ignored. Then that gets me thinking about my ex missing just talking to her, ah its stupid but remember she is the only GF I have had. Kinda stinks feeling like your not good enough ya know. But we will figure it out one day Crazy thing is everything else is perfect for me right now, yet I find it hard not to focus on the one thing I don't have. I don't know why. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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