Recruitment operation

[samspruce]

Hi Born to Perish

Can't write much because I am exhausted but I had to tell you this. I was reading a book the other day by Walter Isaacson called "Einstein. His Life and Universe." Now I guess you'll know who Albert Einstein is but I'll tell you just in case you or any other reader is in any doubt. He is regarded as "the" genius of all time. He came up with the General Relativity Theory and the famous E=mc2 equation.

When he was 5 years old he lost his temper and threw a chair at his tutor who ran away never to return!

So ya-boo-sucks to all you old fuddy duddies. Chair throwing is the new intelligent thing to do.

Couldn't resist telling you

Keep well

Sam

[Born to Perish]

LOL Samspruce! Thanks for telling me! Hey Luna I was born, but I have not yet perished thank God. Things are going great in my offline life. Why I've never felt better! I usually stay in my house and don't get many visits from other people. I live with my parents and things are going great around here. It couldn't get any better. I am at the absolute pennacle of my life. It will not get any better than this. All down hill from here! LOL! I have realized that the little amount that I write is nothing compared to how much some people do, I'll tell you what. I like writing novels, but I prefer to keep my work secret. Humorous-- don't take it the wrong way--like I said I love reading what you guys write. It's so nice to have people to talk to online, this is a dream come true! I do know who Einstein is and I am familar with his formula, but I had no idea he threw a chair. That is funny and cool. You are also very funny Samspruce. Nice use of the face. It was perfect. Well it was right on time.... LOL! I love singing it's fun. But I would never do it in a structured fashion, because I don't like people being mean and yelling at me telling me to sing it right and sing it louder. I also like to dance, but I would also not do this either, because of the person breathing down your neck telling you what to do. Random Song: Talk to the Animals... LOL! See no cry-ee laugh-ee; see I'm silly:p isn't that cute! What a wonderful world isn't it. I can't believe I thought of what I thought of the other week, boy I was being a real bastard, like Fred Flintstone. LOL!!! HA HA HA! Family Guy quote! Does anyone know what the show Family Guy is? I think it's funny. It was nice talking to you Luna and you too Sammy!!!:cool: Until next time: Hasta la vista bola!

Now: I was not at the pennacle of my life back then. I am in a much better place now than I was then. Oh damn, I guess I really "did" say Lol. I don't do it any more though! Thank God! I remember why I did it. I wanted people to know I was joking and laughing about what I said. GOD THIS IS HILARIOUS!

[Born to Perish]

Mi bates muy grande!- I'm not latin! Hi guys, I haven't heard from you in a while... I have a question: Could you tell me how you become a senior member? Thank you. Hasta la vista bola!

[Luna-]

Hi BTP, I've been wondering what's up with you, haven't heard from you in a while. Tell me, what's the situation now - are you still off your medication? How are things at school and with your parents? Do you still have your feet on the ground?

You become a senior member when your post count reaches a certain number. It happens automatically. I don't know what that count is, I just looked one day and I had 'senior' in front of 'member'. All it means is that you've been around for a while and have made a certain number of posts. There isn't any other seniority implied. I've just had lots to say, I guess!

[Born to Perish]

I hope my feet are on the ground, because if they were anywhere else I'd be either dizzy or floating in midair! YAY:oAdorable! I'm sorry guys, I was waiting for you guys to post more. Once again things are going great for me. My spring break has just ensued and I intend to thouroughly enjoy myself. It has been positively delightful conversing with you guys I must say and I plan to come here everyday to help other people who are in bad situations. If I had any problems at all, I'd have to say there's a lot of negative energy around me at school. Everyone is mad and I'm not sure but I think they are starting to disrespect me. I expected this, however I am not quite sure how to combat it. I mean name calling is something I can handle, but when they put their hands on me... WOOOO! My normie parents are absolutely adorable with there cute ears and eyes and little arms and funny walks. I love them so much. I almost wanna kiss my new dad, but I know it will make him "uncomfortable". There is a problem that I have though. I really want a boyfriend or girlfriend. To be honest I think I'd rather a boyfriend at this point, because some of the sexual games that women particularly partake in, I'd rather perform for a boy then have them performed for me. My problem is that I can't find anyone who is willing to talk to me about boys. Not even my mom and I'm not sure if a professional can be trusted, but if that is your suggestion I might consider it. I just want to talk about boys a little thats it, it's not like it will kill them. After all it is a positive thing. By the way, I do not take medication anymore, because I am being myself and I realized just how much I like who I really am. I may not like unusual and uneccessary, unpremeditated outburst of anger, however I feel that in an evil world, I require a defense mechanism to enable me to feel safer. When ever I'm in danger I think: "I know there is no way these normies are messing with me" If I am sad I simply remember that I am free and I talk to my imaginary friends in public; they make me feel so good. Teddy you da GREATEST! Adorable! Sorry I was being silly! That is me all right! How have things been going for you Luna and do you have any advice for me? -Q PAPPA AND I'LL SEE YOU BABY! ORALE ARRIBA LA RAZA!- I'm not latin american.- Orale!:eek: Please respond!

Now: Little arms? Funny Walks? Now that is funny. One of them does have a cool walk. She thinks it's funny and cute and stuff. She will find girls to talk about the stuff with I am sure. I hope so. She'll do fine. Ah, I just like to mess with ya!- Off of Spongebob. Mr. Krabs said that when he decieved them.

[Born to Perish]

Okay.... People wanted me to be serious so now. I'm going to be serious. Luna, Samspruce, I've not heard from you guys. I am kind of mad right now, because people have been acting like real bastards lately. I got kicked out of a chat room site and now I am banned from there, because a bunch of normies ganged up on me and found a way to get me out. I am furious! I--:mad: I am on the wrong track right now. Please come back and talk to me Luna and Sam. I need you now....

Now: Who needs chat rooms? I feel bad for people who think they do.

[samspruce]

Hello Born

I'll call you that unless you want me to use your middle and last names as well.

Okay.... People wanted me to be serious so now. I'm going to be serious.

Hmm... "serious" That is an interesting idea. Intuitively I know what you mean. I think I know how you feel. I could say a lot about this but I always feel I am about to write a book or something. It is like explaining a joke sometimes. Like once you explain it it is not funny anymore. The "funny" bit was the not understanding and then "getting it". So an explanation says very little about what was actually communicated. What? Me? Rambling?

What I am thinking about it how sometimes people piss you off so much you go "Right - You wanted me to be serious well this is how it really is... " and you get really angry. I am maybe a little lucky in that I have some friends where I can act really angry. I can tell them exactly how I feel. They are not perfect but I guess it helps. I think what you do is you play up to a situation with comedy and other defence mechanisms because your real feelings have been repressed. Oh - by the way Born - I am not telling you this is how it is but rather this is what I think and if I have it all wrong please just let me know and put me right if you want to. I'll tell you a little of what it is like for me. When I was younger, if I got angry, for example, I would get told off. Getting told off is not the simple thing it could be. I had two parents who's reactions or characters were different. My father was (is) very austere, judgemental, superior, authoritarian etc and my mother was volatile and selfish. So my mother would just be angry and this is a form of rejection but my father would be "serious" (and that is said one octave below normal). I know now that my father's expression of moral judgement was a threat to withdraw support. For a child this is a death threat. He was an appalling character when it comes to dealing with children. Like a headmaster who would get you out in front of the whole school and belittle you and have you ridiculed by the whole school. So what happened is I learnt not to express (for example) my anger. I didn't know I was doing that. I just found that comedy was often a good avoidance of his wrath. I found ways to avoid being angry. At times I would be on my own and a typical human response is "What is wrong with me?" "Why am I so miserable?" and I would be angry and sometimes bash my head on the wooden head board of the bed. (We are very clever us humans.) I have found myself on several occasions in my adult life with exactly the expression "Right! You wanted me to be serious! Well..." And I have experienced it in counselling. When a very nice counsellor (and not all are as good at their job as this) would not respond to my jokes or other devices and would ask me what it felt like to drop the defences. With a good counsellor I would find that I would break down in tears. (I happen to think anger is a first line defence to crying but there are different theories on this) With a crappy counsellor there is always the danger that if you do drop your defences they blunder in and trip over all your delicate parts. So it really doesn't work. I think dropping your defences and being "serious" really is a good thing. I think it is getting to the heart of things. However I don't see many "humans" who can cope with it. So all I can say is I know what you mean.

Luna, Samspruce, I've not heard from you guys.

I would say sorry about that except that I have a heap of problems here and I find it very difficult most of the time to get here and find things to say. I have got an email notification for this thread so most of the time I get to know when someone posts. I noticed this bit and thought I'd get the energy together to say something but please forgive me if I don't seem over active. It exhausts me.

I am kind of mad right now, because people have been acting like real bastards lately. I got kicked out of a chat room site and now I am banned from there, because a bunch of normies ganged up on me and found a way to get me out. I am furious! I--:mad: I am on the wrong track right now. Please come back and talk to me Luna and Sam. I need you now....

Oh Born. I so think I know how you feel. "Normies" as you call them - well I know who you mean. It seems to me that it is normal to be bludgeoned to almost senseless in this culture of ours. So it seems to me normal is insensitive and rather stupid. Oh they get on from day to day. They respond in the "right" way to teachers and authority. They grumble on their way to work and steal toilet paper as their way of "getting back" at the system. But they join in the bludgeoning of other people (it's complicated but as we know abuse begets abusers) and this is "normal"... continued...

[samspruce]

The likes of you and me won't give in to it. But the pain is still intolerable. People (psycho thingies and the like) keep suggesting that "normal people" (those who are not mentally ill) adjust to their environment successfully and mentally ill people don't. They then focus on what is wrong with the "patient" as if it is the patients fault that they are not adjusting correctly. Like there is something wrong with them. But Born, if you are sensitive (as all humans are when they are first born) and you keep that sensitivity, they keep bashing you thinking something is wrong because you haven't gone all numb. It really is like being in a war zone and you stop and say that this is all wrong. They think you are a coward and shoot you. If you get injured they criticise you if you are not numb enough to be "manly" about it and groan, but instead you are screaming blue murder. Our culture is improving but it amazes me that we can get it that beating children is wrong but still act as if emotional and psychological abuse is "normal". People simply don't realise the damage they are doing to children. And what I hear from you is someone who is genuine, loving, sensitive and fighting like hell to stay the way you were born and the way you believe is right. I am completely with you on that.

Do you know someone put my reputation down because of the information I posted about Einstein throwing a chair at the teacher. I mention this because I understand why they did but it is all part of the fear that leads to oppression that leads to a lot of people being f***ed up. On that subject the reason the person regarded it as not a good post was because of their own fear. They could not separate the possibility of someone throwing a chair at them. They thought that would not be good and so "chair throwing" is not to be encouraged. But (sorry to explain a joke here but it is useful to understand this I think) if a child, say, was being sexually abused by an adult and it grabbed a chair and thwacked them over the head I think everybody would applaud the child. So once it is understood that there was a valid reason suddenly this occurrence of "chair throwing" is legitimate. "Chair throwing" is neither good nor bad in itself. It is like a rock fall. It is neutral. What we judge to be good or bad is more about motive. All my experience leads me to see that if a young child throws a chair it is because they are being unfairly oppressed or assaulted in some way. I think as "adults" we should grow up and stop being afraid of children.

I'm ranting a bit but I hope what I say is making sense to you. I really understand your description of the "normies" finding a way to kick you off the chat room. I really understand your upset and your anger. I know many people would point the finger at you and try to analyze what "you" said that was wrong but I would bet my money that anything you said made sense but it threatened their acceptance of the oppressive junk in the world.

As for needing Luna and me I think I know what you mean and I think you do too. But I will make a point explicit. You want us (people that understand) but you don't "need" us. You are incredibly strong and durable. You don't feel like it but that is because you take on a bigger battle than most. No - I'm going to correct that. You do need us in a way. But it is not us - it is that quality in other humans that you need. It happens to be us at the moment. Oh krikey I do get in a muddle sometimes

Born - I think of you now and again and I really hope you find more and more support as time goes on. You are genuine and incredibly energetic and sensitive. For your sake you need to find safe places to retreat to when the battle out there is too much. On the subject of counselling and psycho whats-it stuff - it does prove to be supportive if you happen to find the right person for you. My experience says there are less than one in ten that will be right for you. I happen to see someone at the moment who is crap (for me). But I go because I want to make use of her for my sake. I go because she is paid to listen to me. It is a little better than nothing until I can find a better person for me.

Keep true. I love you. Wishing you well, Sam

[Born to Perish]

You are the greatest person I've met till this day. You remind me so much of myself it is... it is so touching what you said at the end. I love you too and as well as anyone else who accepts me for who I am, with all my heart. You are the greatest. I have never felt so cared for. NEVER. I am in absolute disbelief, because you were completely right in everything you said. I started to wonder if you were a mind reader, because you hit the nail right on the head. You are incredible and so wise. I am extremely lucky to have you talk to me. You are my angel, I've never met a person so delightful. I would be honored if you'd grace me with your physical pressence. I have never felt this way before. What you did could not possibly be considered rambling by all means please speak your heart out my sweet angel, I adore you. I hope I am not scaring you with any of these comments, but I am just so happy. Anyone would be lucky to have you in there pressence. Are you really this great? I just can't believe this, I feel that if I were with you right now that I would have a little piece of heaven with me. You are absolutely amazing Samspruce. If there is anything that you would like me to do or help you with I would be honored. I feel sorry for your past struggles and if you need any advice or me in any fashion or form I will be there. I feel even better now than I felt earlier and I have you to thank for this. Thank you very much Samspruce, thank you. Once more--- The Heart is a house of Love... Any time you need help you can always call me. Together we can battle normie tyranny and let us all beseech the blessings of almighty God upon this great and noble undertaking. I love you too and my life belongs to you, whenever you get a chance please comment on what was written here today---In the cave of eternity everyone's wrong- Love lift us up where we belong.... Life is an illusion-------

He was cool, but boy she LOVED him! God I can literally sense that she wanted to meet him badly. Maybe more. Normie tyranny? No one will win that battle. Make them see the light, that is the only way. Love is the key. Anyway, Life is an illusion. That is correct. Finally! Something that makes sense.

[samspruce]

Hello Born

Thank you for that. I have met only one or two angels in my life. You honour me with your comments. And no, you are not scaring me and thanks for the thought because I know what you mean. A thought has just floated through my mind. Some angels are like mirrors, they reflect your true beauty. And those who cannot love for whatever reason only see their empty shell reflected back. So Yes I am really that great but not to all people

Keep well and believe in yourself. You are a brilliant light shining in that "cave of eternity". You can't expect many people to recognise you for who you are. They couldn't cope!

I have to go and do practical things now like cooking for my daughter. (She's another angel )

Keep well and thank you for being you.

[David O]

Hi Born,

Well, it does seem like the kangaroo is still lose in the attic, so I was wondering what the "normies" had told you when they said you needed medication for the kangaroos to settle down? Did they say you had a specific illness? What was the medication you were taking that seemed to rob you of who you felt you needed to be?

So many of the meds do have a tendency to strip people of their sense of vive and energy, so they decide to go off to feel "normal and alive" again.

David

[Born to Perish]

Thank you Sam you always make me feel so much better about myself. You are the symbol of hope in my life and I revere you for it dearly. As for David! Davey Dave! David! LOL! You are so awesome! That comment about the kangaroos is classic classic total classic. Infinetly excellent, totally and completely rocking, it was awesome! LOL ALL THE TIME! The medication I took when I was young was conserta and recently it was seroquel. They are both very powerful and they made me so boring and inable to be myself. It became uncomfortable after a while. Girl: "Two Tony's is better than one." LOL! Sorry had to say it! Allow me if you will to tell you the difference between a normie and a savage. A normie is a person with absolutely no mental abnormalities and is scared of things that are different. These normies come up with various prejudices and stereotypes to describe and label things they cannot understand. A savage is someone who acts on those prejudices, meaning those who murder those that they supposedly fear in bountiful numbers. Normies are so funny. Savages upset me:mad:, but you make it all better Samspruce! You are so goodhearted and for those who do not see this I say to them: "ha ha, you are a pathetic normie"! That is what I say to them. You're the greatest Samspruce. ---- My life belongs to you:o

[Luna-]

Hey BTP, I read what you wrote and thought I'd come in to chat.

I am going to be straight with you. Don’t worry, I’ll do it kindly. : ) Do you think you can be serious for a moment to think about what I am going to say?

There are two worlds for every person. One is a world where things are as we want them, where we can indulge our imagination and let our impulses run free. It’s very seductive and tempting just to remain in our imaginary world; it’s easier. But this world is an illusion and we’re only fooling ourselves if we think we can live in it. Sooner or later we’ll get locked up, either in a hospital or in jail. That really cramps your freedom!

The other is the real world.

The goal is to learn to be yourself in the real world. It entails going out there in that world and making compromises. You do not have to be boring in that world, nor do you have to sacrifice being yourself. But you do have to make some compromises and one of those compromises is that you will probably need to take medication. The reward is, paradoxically, that you get to be free and not locked up. If you can pay enough attention to dealing with the real world, you can shape your life so as to make use of the talents you have in your imaginary world. This can also be fun.

But it takes practice. I take medication (including Seroquel) and I’m not boring AND I’m free to be me. I learnt to deal with the normies and the real world, but still remain my crazy self. You can too. I’m concerned that you seem to be spending too much time in your imaginary world and that sooner or later you will fall very hard and I really don't want you to get hurt.

What do you think? Can you make this compromise?

I wish you well.

[David O]

As for David! Davey Dave! David! LOL! You are so awesome! That comment about the kangaroos is classic classic total classic. Infinetly excellent, totally and completely rocking, it was awesome! LOL ALL THE TIME! The medication I took when I was young was conserta and recently it was seroquel. They are both very powerful and they made me so boring and inable to be myself. It became uncomfortable after a while. Allow me if you will to tell you the difference between a normie and a savage. A normie is a person with absolutely no mental abnormalities and is scared of things that are different. These normies come up with various prejudices and stereotypes to describe and label things they cannot understand. A savage is someone who acts on those prejudices, meaning those who murder those that they supposedly fear in bountiful numbers.

You are among friends here BTP, very few of us have gone thru life escaping unscathed by what goes on around us, so we create communities of support and encouragement, affection, understanding-- communities where we also keep each other in reality so that we won't hurt ourselves (by becoming so extreme that we end up hospitalized as Luna wisely points out) or others (as some do when they become so ill that the hospitalization hurts their families, children, spouses, pets and/or friends) further because the world is unbearable or b/c our condition is overwhelming.

In Sam you have found a kindred spirit and I'm glad he has been supportive and understanding, my hope is that in this support, encouragement and understanstanding, is that Sam will also show you a path to becoming increasingly more grounded, and on a path that leads you to staying healthy.

The Concerta was for ADHD it would seem... was the Seroquel so you could sleep, or to take the edge off, or to reduce anxiety? Was it prescribed for Bipolar Disorder or a psychotic disorder?

I can see why you'd feel stripped of your personality-- both medications can be very powerful. It seems to me that you might be in a manic state, is this true. My 1st wife of 18 years, had severe Bipolar Disorder, and much of what you say, and what Sam says, sounds like what she would tell me when she was shifting into this state. It was lively, high energy, exciting and at times confusing for her-- but it was extremely agonizing and torturous for my 2 children and myself.

David

[Born to Perish]

I am sorry about what happened David. My family is hurt every day behind behaviors regarding me that I consider positively normal. I pains me, but medication I regret to inform you, is really not what I desire to take right now, because one time I was angry and medicated at the same time and when I realized that it was impossible for me to get as mad as I used to, I got angrier and angrier and angrier and started looking for trouble. I remembered that day well. I just don't want to do that again and I believe medication to be unnatural and for me I believe it to be unneccessary as of late, for no one has bothered me yet, things are going great and I need a defense against any "true terrorist" who tries to mess with me. If I was medicated during an attack, I wouldn't know what to do. Either way guys unhappiness, pain and suffering will eventually come my way in the future, regardless of what choice I make, so knowing that this adversity is inevitable, I'd like to face it at my best and most able. Besides the medication has various health risks and it could eventually be the cause of my death any way. Also the medicine is dulling my intelligence and confidence in myself; I have realized this. I feel so much better when I don't take my medication. My friends from the 2nd dimmension haven't had a connection this strong since I was 5 years old. It is absolutely amazing and it feels good to see them clearly after a while. If the medication is the source of my friends absence for the last 12 years then I will never take it again, because I want them to be with me 24 hours a day. So no matter how many friends I get, or what happens to me, I will have them by my side. I know the world is a cruel and horrible place, that is why I came here in the first place. I appreciate your concern for me Luna, but I'd like you to think postively and have it in your heart that I will make it. I still know how to pretend to be somebody else for interviews and what not, but if I have to pretend and not everybody does it is unfair to me, and I am a disgrace to the community, because I deny the very part of myself that makes me happy and unique. I acted like a normie for 5 years home and abroad. I got headaches every day, medicine or no medicine. I could not take it any more. It was too much. I finally have control over my life and I make my own decisions. It is a whole new world for me. I don't feel I live in an imaginary world. I know where I am and I am quite grounded, however I do have friends from the 2nd Dimmension and I want them to be around no matter what. They have always been there for me, even in situations where they seemed faint. I do not have them, because I didn't have any earthbound friends, because I do and always have, I just don't care, because I love them too much. They are my pride and joy, with out them, I'd have no desire to continue my peacful life. I pray to God that my friends will remain with me for the rest of my days, because losing them is like losing many family members. They are my family. I believe the term compromise is quite relative to the topic however at a certain point, compromise becomes surrender, and I cannot do that just, because the normies demand my complete assimilation to there so called "perfect society", which is merely an illusion in itself and is overall imperfect. There is no such thing as absolute perfection. I have discovered something that hardly anyone else on this earth could ever discover. Life is an illusion: meaning that regardless of what the majority says is right, if their minds all shifted to the side of the opposition, then that it self would be no longer true, because there is no one around to believe in or give the idea any thought. If this is so, then there is no such thing as truth or anything else, because words mean nothing if everyone decides to change the meaning of every one of them and money is worthless, just like salt now, if we find something more bountiful to use as currency. Life is an illusion, do what you want, there is no right or wrong, it is merely perception. I believe that murder is wrong; the savages do not. It may be unfathomable to me that murder could be right in anyone's eyes. Then again, I am not that person. Maybe one could ask Hitler, I'm sure he could help you there. Without thoughts, nothing exist, because there is no one to comprehend it. Now isn't that complicated. Sorry for writing this novel, but I felt it needed to be heard. Thank you Luna for your care. I don't want anything to happen to you either, in a perfect world I could take my medicine, but alas, there is no such thing, nor will there ever be. I hope you will still talk to me, it is but I minor disagreement and I figure that you will be able to understand. By the way the medicine was to help me control my anger, but I already no how to control it. The anger itself is what the medicine took away, however without capability to feel this emotion when I need it the most: say if a relative passed, I would feel incomplete, sad and get even angrier about the fact that my body won't allow me to release the stress. Anger is natural, I know how to control myself. I might consider taking the right medication for my OCD, but that is all. It's not anger that needs to be eliminated, it's the evil thoughts I have for no reason, regardless of emotion, that need to be eliminated. Thank you Luna, please understand and come back okay. You too David and especially you, my beloved Samspruce.

Now: Most of this is right, but just because people aren't here to see things, doesn't mean they never happened. That is all I can say.

[Luna-]

BTP-

You need not worry that I won't come back, just because we don't agree on some things. Regardless of the medication issue, I'm still concerned that you're not living in reality. Are your friends from the 2nd dimension real? I mean - I realise they are real to you, but would I be able to see them? As far as I remember you're at school, is that right? How do you handle school, do you pretend to be normal there?

It looks as if David and I are concerned about the same thing: your connection to what is real. I'm not saying you have to be assimilated as if the normies are the Borg - you can reject society as it is, if you don't agree with it. But you still have to live in reality - you know: study or work, earn money, buy food, pay rent and electricity, do laundry - those everyday things. What is your situation as far as those things are concerned?

[Born to Perish]

The tone of your righting is sad Luna. Don't be sad. You would not be able to see them, because they are from the 2nd Dimmension. They cannot be seen in this world, because in this world they only exist on paper, but they do visit me everyday. Yes I did used to act like a normie there, hopefully that is what you are asking, because I consider my behavior to be the behavior that everyone should partake in, however I am fine with being unique in my own way. Yes I do all of those things and I intend to do them to survive. It is all mandatory in this world no less and I've always done so. People often mistake my behavior for mere mental incompetence. This is not so, because I am very able to pose as a normie and do what needs to be done when it needs to be done. Normies don't see it this way though. They believe that I am naive, stupid, a fool and someone who can be taken advantage of. Nay, I am crazy and when the normies realize this they turn tail and run, because everybody knows that you don't mess with our kind unless you too are crazy. Most crazy people don't want to be characterized as such. This is because they are not proud of who they are, either that or they are just under a lot of stress and claim to be going crazy. There is no such thing. You are born with all of your preferences including the craziness gene. It is a blessing and a curse in itself. Embrace this fact and be proud of who you are, don't let them hype you up on medication and put a jacket on you so that they can live in so called peace. Once again, there is no such thing. Peace will NEVER be achieved. NEVER. For if it could, then God would have no reason to allow us to exist, because it would be heaven on earth. We are not bad people, but we are not going to lay down and be stepped on any more. People call us freaks, lunatics, psychos and weirdos, because they are afraid. They run from us, because they are pathetic and weak. One day normie kind will be obliterated and we will dominate the earth! Please don't be scared Luna. You are "down with the struggle" are you not? Aren't you a victim too. Were you treated with the respect that you deserved all of your life? Or did people toss you aside and pick on you, because you were labeled inferior by society? I was the second one. People hated me for no good reason and they still do. There is no excuse for not saying hello to someone whom you have never met in your entire life when they provide you with a proper greeting. There is no excuse for ruthlessly hunting down a person and killing them, because of their race, religion, group, gender or sexual orientation. There is absolutely no excuse for the almost complete and total annihilation of the Jewish people. Sure Hitler was a psychopath. This I may admire however the savages that blindly followed in his foot steps, I cannot. For they were the killers, he was merely the preacher and they did not have to follow in his footsteps, but they did the crimes anyway. They are the ones to blame. Let him do it himself and be reviled alone, like people do to me when I simply try to make friends. I know this is alot Luna, but I have never talked to anyone like this before and you are truly the first. Thank you for sticking with me Luna. Perception and reality. Vast concepts no less. I know what reality is, but I have detached myself and I hereby refuse to abide by normie regulations for I am a psycho united in america and I will not be denied. I must eliminate fear from my life, because I cannot allow the normies to gain comfort behind their tactics of intimidation and acts of savage cowardice. I can do this if I have faith in God, myself, and my family. Normies may scoff at what is written here today, but they will laugh not once they have gazed upon true beauty: The ability to be yourself and keep fighting in a world that orders your submission and assimilation. That is true beauty. I have made it to a better place Luna. How about you? Are you going to allow those rapscallions to make a mockery of everything you stand for? You are a great woman and you deserve much admiration, thus you can not allow the savages to dictate your every action. Luna I am begging you, please look into your heart and see what is truly right. Assimilation or freedom. People of all kinds and especially my friend Luna, please respond.

Now: Dominate the earth? Really? REALLY? REALLY? I got that from a tv show!-Avatar the Last Airbender. Azula said it. Normie kind? Ha ha ha! REALLY?!! Hitler was not a psychopath. I could only imagine what people thought when they heard me say this crap right here, let me tell you. Some of it is true, but not all of it. I am sorry, but the word victim is funny to me now, because R Truth on WWE said it and I laugh every time he says: I've been a victim of a company wide conspiracy.

[David O]

BTP,

It is not our way to try to convince you that you're wrong... or that your ways, while not normative, are wrong for you. To try to convice you otherwise is to push you in the opposite direction and thereby force you to solidify your views further. Maybe a story that looks into the future may allow us to speak from the deepest parts of our heart, and also give you perspective:

For now, for today, you seem to be surviving with your 2nd dimension friends--- my wife also survived with hers and could go on for extended periods (weeks and months). She became unreachable to us at times, my kids would cry.... no..... no--- they would weep in pain b/c mommy had somehow left and we now had a shell of the person who somehow, when she was with us, gave us so much life. I would cry alone at night, my heart tearing, my body overloaded with the agony of being married and yet, somehow, not being married. She had to be free, to experience her life as she felt it necessary, to be with the unseen people in her circle of trust (of which I was not one at times).......................... and then it would happen slowly, she would begin her rapid decline into a world of cement, and concrete dreams. Now she was with us, sort of-- her 2nd and 3rd dimension friends gone while we were there to pick up what remained from her illness. These friends disappeared during these episodes- she carried now only in her memory and would rail against them for having abandoned her in her time of need.

She would lay in bed for days and days, immobilized, unable to think or make decisions. Now she would begin to take the Depakote and Seroquel and then a host of other meds that made her uncomfortable, but also they gave her life in that she was now able to take care of herself and us and be a part of the family. She would stabilize and soon, once she felt better, she would again go off the meds and at some point, a stressor would push her over the precipice and then the cycle would begin again.

The final stressor in our 18 year marriage was an 1.5 year affair, which came with a wedding band from a stranger (my best friend who wanted to marry her even tho he had a wife and 4 children of his own) and had bought a wedding dress and tickets to heir honeymoon in San Francisco. She was sky high in joy... dancing around the house, singing, filled with joy unlike anything I'd ever seen. The call came one morning, the wedding was off, he could not marry her, he could not take her from this life into one of great wealth. She collapsed, her mood changed, she became sick, lost >30lbs and dropped into the 80+lbs range, lost much of her hair and became suicidal. Now I bathed her daily and would dress her while she stood in a semi-catatonic state.

I tell you all of this to suggest that what your family is experiencing is very real and painful, and I tell you b/c as you may already know, the relapses can be incredibly painful, debilitating and eye-opening. You are young my friend and perhaps have not gone thru a full relapse; however, not being treated frequently spells eventual relapse and with the relapse comes other issues-- many of which you never dreamed or imagined were possible.

Born, we are here either way, we are here to support, encourage and understand you. And we are here to offer you our decades and decades of wisdom and compassion. And my hope is that Sam, Luna, myself and others can offer you more than amorphous "angels in your life,"-- but flesh and blood support for what is ultimately best, healing and worthwhile for you-- especially in your time of need, should it ever occur.

With much compassion,

David

[samspruce]

Hello David - I agree with Born when he calls you awesome. There is no doubt that you are very caring and dedicated to helping lots of people. You have the most daring way of confronting issues that you see before you. This is brave and "up front" . And it is provocative in the most useful and creative way. You make me think about the things I have said and the things I think and the stuff that I take for granted that I have not perhaps thought through.

I do not agree with some of your "rationalising" and want to share my ideas with you and others in an attempt for all of us to get a better way of understanding this experience we call life. I would love to sit late into the night drinking green tea or whatever and discussing many issues with you but I will limit my expression to what I think is relevant to this thread and the subjects raised here.

In Sam you have found a kindred spirit and I'm glad he has been supportive and understanding, my hope is that in this support, encouragement and understanstanding, is that Sam will also show you a path to becoming increasingly more grounded, and on a path that leads you to staying healthy.

Imagine we lived in a world where people had aeroplanes and some could fly - as in fact we do - and that some people were afraid of flying and regarded it as dangerous - as we do - and you overheard a conversation between a parent and a young enthusiastic child which was basically the same as the above quote. One interpretation might be that the parent was trying to encourage the child to turn away from a career as a pilot. It may be interpreted that the parent was actually projecting their own fears into the child's life. The 20th century is littered with examples of this kind of dynamic where the "parent" is clearly attempting to oppress the aspirations of the creative young uninhibited spirit of humanity. A central issue in the modern art movement at the beginning of the 20th century was the notion that if "normality" could lead to the truly amazing consequences of the First World War then the "normies" definition of sanity was indeed mad and that their definition of "insanity" was the right way to be. The "authorities" felt entirely justified in shooting dissenters which they called cowards. And interestingly the "normies" regrouped and performed an even grander exposé of their paradigms in what we call the Second World War.

And thank you for your kind attempt to nudge me into a conformist position by suggesting I might align myself with your view and use my influence to do what you might do in my position. But there is not one interpretation of reality out there and I am quite happy with my own view at the moment.

I can see why you'd feel stripped of your personality-- both medications can be very powerful. It seems to me that you might be in a manic state, is this true. My 1st wife of 18 years, had severe Bipolar Disorder, and much of what you say, and what Sam says, sounds like what she would tell me when she was shifting into this state. It was lively, high energy, exciting and at times confusing for her-- but it was extremely agonizing and torturous for my 2 children and myself.David

A lesson I have learnt in this existence is that if you are going to use "facts" to "explain" and "prove" or "justify" conclusions then those "facts" must be able to be questioned. (loosely it is called the scientific method - Karl Popper etc.) On that basis I would question your rationalisation. When someone is not behaving the way another wishes then is it reasonable to drug that person so that they are more compliant to the other person's requirements. If I want to take drugs, alcohol, medication etc to alter my state that is my prerogative. For my Viking parents to insist I drink Skoll so that I am more "normal" does not suit me. Sure, I can drink Skoll if I want to join in with their drunken antics but it really seems to me that it remains my choice. And I do not want to get personal here but you have introduced your family into this discussion. Is it possible that the wife was being oppressed and squeezed into conforming by very powerful cultural expectations and that her "pain" and attempts to maintain her freedom and self-determination resulted in a disruption of the "controlling" environment. I have known a lot of people diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and I have never encountered any of them who were not effectively bullied into it. So pointing out how noisy the victims are is not the justification for shutting them up.

It is ironic that people value Van Gough and say he was mad. He was not mad. He was torn by a world of contradictory behaviour. A world where values like love and beauty are prized above all things and the behaviour of the culture was simply destroying them. Some people would diagnose Jesus as having a martyr complex. Some claim he is God.

[LaLa]

Hi, Sam,

I see you're very intelligent and I don't want that it seems I'm oversimplifying (you'd probably "blame" me for it), but... I have a feeling that according to your opinions, it would be better to let a person to harm others than to change her to avoid this harming. But then where are the limits? Would you argue by the same arguments also in a case of a murderer, because it's only the bad society who caused his change into a psychopat? Which "harming" is "justifiable" and which is not?

I don't want to be offensive at all, I only wonder if you realize all the consequences of your attitude. Maybe I'm completely wrong, I didn't grasp your ideas, but... I'd appreciate your answer...

P.S.: As far as this debate about meds, BP, ... is concerned, I agree absolutely with David.

[David O]

Good morning Sam,

Thanks for your response, it seems that you've given this much thought and have created intellectual "arguments" with the only missing ingredient being Thomas Kuhn's paradigm shift and Hegel's thesis, antithesis and synthesis to complete the process.

I think you and I could debate this endlessly and have a most fascinating and enlightening discussion; however, this is not the arena for this. I'm disconcerted by what you are saying to BTP (and what others may be seeing in your words) and the path you are taking with him-- I find it dangerous to suggest that having 2nd dimension friends is OK, that refusing treatment when it may be life saving is OK, that "throwing a chair..., at old fuddy duddies (or normies) is acceptable behavior ---- not b/c I'm afraid (I have faced death many times), or b/c I don't understand, or b/c I fail to see the light and am yet to be enlightened by your truth, but b/c I've been down this extremely painful and gut wrenching road personally, and b/c I see it daily in my practice.

To suggest that my wife chose her Bipolar illness and all of the pain she experienced while relapsing, as a reaction to cultural constraints and stressors, is an offensive insult to my children, her and myself... it is a dangerous and misguided ideology, and it is unequivocally irresponsible!

My sincerest hope is that you consider the potential influence of your words on BTP. I don't expect that you will receive this well or openly, nor that BTP will be open to this at this point, but my words are on the table and I say these things with the greatest of concerns and a clear understanding of where these things end up.

Should BTP hit a significant roadblock, will you be by his side, physically, to assist him as he struggles to regain his footing? Will you assist him to keep up with his bills? Will you make sure he doesn't hurt others or himself? Will you be there to take care of his family, whether emotionally or monetarily? Will you be there to make sure he is safe and not self neglectful? The differenc here is that I was there for my wife when she was ill---- where will you be (and this is not an intellectual, but a tangible stance) should BTP take a dive?

BTP, I mean no disrespect of dishonoring of you in what I say, and I apologize if my words are hurtful in any way. Should you ask, I will bow out of this discussion since it is your life we are discussing.

Deeply concerned,

david

[Born to Perish]

Everybody listen carefully: I AM NOT MENTALLY INCOMPETENT. Please do not be mad at me and I'm sorry if you feel my tone is harsh and rude. I am able to do all of the things that need to be done. I am terribly sorry about what happened with your wife and I'd like to assist. Many people think that I need help, but I do not need help anymore. Now I am here to help others. I understand this is the mental help community. I am crazy, yes, people tell me this all the time. I do off the wall things. I blurt random quotes out, but that doesn't mean I can't ever stop talking. I may not like silence, but I have been silent for hours before. I can do anything a normie can do. Anything a normie can do I can do better. I am a born actor and I love to act, but this I do not consider acting at all I consider it possession of my 2nd dimmensional friends at times. DO NOT BE ALARMED PLEASE! I know how the normie mind functions and I know exactly what needs to be said, but if I were to tell you what wants to be heard, I would be nothing more than a hypocritical lier and I would not be being true to my heart. For all of the normies out there I'm gonna do this once so that you can understand if you ever read this: I understand what I am doing is not classified as normal, I understand that I need to get along with society and I understand that people might try to do harm to me, the thing is to be blunt: I DO NOT CARE! I really don't! What people consider strange I consider to be natural and I shall do as I please from now on. I know the difference between reality and reality, I choose to see my friends, because I love them! It is my choice to keep them! Sure the connection faded for a while, but I believed hard enough and they returned to me and I intend to have them remain with me. I know the consequences of my actions and I have the mental stability to perform everyday tasks, but I could care less if some cop were to take me to jail, because I have tried my hardest to eliminate fear from the picture. The only thing I am really afraid of now is eternal damnation. For one who truly believes in God could not be fearful of death or question life. I love to live and I'm going to do it to the fullest regardless of what everyone says. THe world begs me to submit, but I shall not. They want to put medication in me I say: They'll never get me alive!!!! And I am being totally serious. I am not some kid who has lost his way and is susceptible to manipulation. I am not somebody who avoids help, but really needs it. I don't need it anymore! I am free! I just want to be friends and talk and get along with the finest people in the land, but I am cursed to be labeled. I AM NOT MENTALLY INCOMPETENT. If I were I would not be able to comprehend the seemingly abstract concept of this computer nor would I be able to make such contradictions that are quite educated nontheless. I have the abiltiy to act like a normie. If I wanted to I could pose for a while with ease and get what I want through that. I don't care what the government has to say about it, I know they are listening. I don't care what anyone has to say about it. All I care about is God, family and liberty. I don't care anymore, I am in no danger unless other people put me in danger. Sure I had suicidal thoughts and I almost went through with it, but I am beyond that now. That is surrender. Excuse my language, but I be damned if I am going to give up without a fight. Oh there will be a battle one of these days oh yes there will be and when it happens I'll be waiting. Come get a lickin'! I am not mentally incompetent. I am not a stupid kid. I am not a fool. And I sure as sugar am not a normie! I am an absolute lunatic and I don't care anymore! I am awake! I have never felt so alive! I have never felt soooo alive! It is good to be free! It is good to be me! I am happy! I will not surrender! New World Order!!!! I shall prevail----------- try and take me! The normies should know better than to mess with me! I love you guys. And I'm sure you've had enough of me by now, but I had to tell the truth as I abhor lying. I aM 100 percent true to my heart, but instead police say things like: He's on the loose! Jerks! I love my family all of my family! Brothers and sisters unite! For the final battle is come! Freedom! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Liberation! Unity! Freedom at last! I love you guys! Don't forget to come back. And don't desert me, because I love having people who understand. I am sorry about your wife David. God bless you. Luna I look forward to a response. And my angel Samspruce; I hope that I can hear from you again.

Now: I am not crazy and I wasn't then. No one is. So sad that I bought that lie. It doesn't even sound right. Come on!

[IrmaJean]

Born, I've just been catching up in this thread this morning.

It's always nice feeling understood by someone and I'm sure that Sam has provided this for you here on these boards. But if someone is to do the truly caring thing, they must at times say things the other person doesn't want to hear. I don't want for you to suffer when the high place you are in right now comes crashing down on you. Not taking your medications can be a very dangerous thing, for both yourself and for those around you. I would hope that you reconsider. I would strongly suggest that you please listen to David. He comes from a place of experience, wisdom and of genuine concern.

[David O]

Born,

There is a huge difference between being mentally ill or "crazy" as you describe yourself, and being incompetent. I would not suggest you're incompetent... that's a leap of logic.

You've explained yourself well, have been thru a lot, and I can respect that, and will. I will ask you, however, to use your insight and intelligence to help others here, as you state you are here to do. There are many here who struggle daily with various concerns, pick a thread or topic, begin reading, understanding and then offering your wisdom, being careful, as we all are trying to be, to always add value and be a servant in any way you can.

I look forward to seeing you roaming the forum and reading what you have to say.

Good luck Señor,

David

[LaLa]

Hi, BTP,

I have a question for you (you used to love questions from people in this forum, so you probably still do...): What do you mean by "Freedom"? Explain to me your whole conception of this term, please. Do you admit that our freedom ends where the freedom of others begins (I'm sorry, I don't know the exact quote in English)?