Quest for my normal

[Hotspot]

A virtual build a bear trip would be fun count me in. Shannon is our official cocoa maker.

Brodman, from what I have been hearing it can sometimes take a while to find the right fit with counselors. Give that referral a call and a chance. I doubt my response would have been any different had I encountered those two you did. My diagnosis is sort of a work in progress the standing one now is severe PTSD. The label isn't all that important to me as feeling better is.

I have gotten my wife a few other gifts. She's been wanting this certain coffee maker, Hoover floor cleaner and the little green machine to accompany her large one. I got her those items. Also I got her the bear I told all of you about. I plan on putting the gift certificates I got to get her hair, nails done at one of her favorite places under the Bear's arm.

I'm not sure what this year's have to have kid's toy was. Nothing the kids asked for or that we got them was hard to get. I am sure I will leave some items out but the main items are the Lego Kingdoms, R/C ATV's with riders, R/C helicopters, Hotwheels super jump raceway, Iron Man 2, Big roaring Rex, Big Foot the monster. The Kinex for the xbox360. Games for both the Wii and xbox. A stack of more board games, art supplies, sports balls. 2 bikes, 1 scooter, 1 skateboard. A lot of clothing. Several items are for each child, then there are those they will share. Thankfully not much requires assembly this year. My wife and I will be putting batteries in some while eating Santa's cookies.

A massage chair sounds really nice. I have a hot tub which hits all the right spots. I have a pool table also but not in place of a dining room table. Ours is in the game room in the basement. We also have Foosball and air hockey. I use to be into repairing pin ball machines. We have several in the game room now. My wife enjoys playing them and the kids like that they don't need quarters.

What's the problem with taking the elderly lady out for dinner?

Anyway, my wife just finished heating up my 10PM dinner, off to eat and sleep hopefully. It has been a long night, day and another evening at work.

[Lindamomof7]

Hey Hotspot Sounds like a kids Christmas at your house similar to mine:D

and of course a practical one for your wife... Thats good enjoy

The severe PTSD diagnosis is a place to start. I don't go by labels either but sometimes it gives us a place to "understand" what is going on with us...

I have asked my husband to find me a pinball machine for years for our game room. I have a 1200 sq ft room converted 3 car garage that is the kids "room" everything and anything is in there for all ages of kids for when my younger daughters have their friends over and then the older kids have their 20 something friends over. No one is allowed in the bedrooms so it is a catch all room and some place I can see them and not in the basement... Oops theres that PTSD stuff coming out in me again...

Last night was spent getting gift bags for the teachers and bus drivers set up. Peter has 6 teachers so it can be a little crazy so I just limit it to a really big Mrs. Prindables chocolate covered apple with nuts, candy etc for them.

I was a little overwhelmed as Peter can be crazy this time of year. Anything out of the ordinary flares his sensory up and makes me crazy'er'. Sure enough he gets this overly cocky attitude and when it came time for a shower and bed, he was a bear.

And to top it off not that my grandmothers antique pottery bowl wasn't enough my husband last night accidently moved the fruit bowl which is on an iron stand and the very large pottery square dish fell and broke. I looked at him and said ok just another pottery piece and left the room and drowned myself in the tv...

Off to therapist this morning and then lunch with my girlfriend... Enjoy the day everyone...

[brodman]

I was readin what you are gettin your wife saw coffee pot vacuum cleaner all I could think was oh my hes gonna be sleepin in the dog house. Then saw the bear with gift certificates whew

Linda Im not shabby in pool GAME ON Missy.

Shanrucas my new massage chair is like electronic heaven I do a lot of driving in different vechicles needed something to help my back ass and legs this really gets all the areas it even heats up if wanted. Hot tubs sound nice dont have actual hot tub but the tub in my masterbath has whirlpool jets which arent bad. I dont like takin baths really and its too time consuming waitin for tub to fill then havin to get in and out redressed This chair rocks just hop in and feel great.

I have basement made more sense to put pool table in dining room that isn't used. Right now basement is pretty empty except for some boxes I haven't unpacked. Ive been furnishing the house as needed I don't need a lot of things Having pinball games sounds nice foosball way better no wonder they keep sending you kids havin a playroom and gameroom like amusment park for kids at your place That list of toys presents sounds way cool I have one of those helicopters fly it all over the house. I have the wii and xbox360 too youll have to tell me how the kinex for it is. I was thinking about getting it they had it for $150 cheapest place I could find it was $130 thought Id wait till it comes down a bit more.

Domino has been playin pool while Im home and not He is so tall he is right at the level of the table he pushes the balls around with his nose gonna have to put the balls away or cover it couldnt find the 3 ball was driving me nuts then went to do his sheets there was the 3 ball

Not really a problem takin the old lady to dinner kind of think it might be weird is all. I gave her card today and asked her if shed like to have dinner at her favorite resturant this sunday she lit up like christmas tree guess it was good present. She invited Domino and I weeks ago for christmas dinner wasnt gonna go originaly decided we will go shes all happy about that.

Dinner at 10pm what do you do hotspot? your hours seem strange. wish i could teach Domino how to heat up food for me.

shanrucas makes the hot chocolate I want some I like whip cream on top of mine please.

[shanrucas]

Linda Im so sorry about your pottery, I understand. I

It sounds like you and Hostpot have a wonderful kids christmas, nothing better I say.

brodman..I can just picture Domino at the pool table, maybe you should consider video taping it. My horse Sam has a giant ball he plays with, its hilarious, I think he thins he's a dog. I think it is lovely that you are taking that older woman out for dinner, My grandma was like that she would rather spend time with me than me ever getting her a gift. I miss her terribly, she passed away at the age of 94 last May.

Well, after many years of just me and mom for Christmas..we are going to have kids over for Christmas morning..Im actually excited about it. My moms caregiver Crystal live just down the street. I suggested a fun thing to do that my dad use to do...She is going to hide their presants here, and when they get up they will find a note on the tree with a string to follow, we are going string it all over the place and eventually it will lead to our house...I can't wait.

Shannon

[shanrucas]

oh and by the way,,,making hot cocoa for everyone, I'll be sure to get whip cream for yours brodman.

[Hotspot]

Linda very sorry you lost your pottery dish. Not a great week for you in that department.

I know what you mean about Peter being more wired up around this time of year. One of our boys has trouble chilling out with all the excitement occurring around him too.

The kids mostly have their toys in their rooms or the play room and the basement use to be my man cave. Over the years though it has become more of the big kids game room. It is a fully finished basement so, it doesn't have that dungeon like feel at all.

I am not much into Holidays but I do enjoy my wife and the kids enjoyment of them all. I really like watching the kids rip open their gifts. My parents always say they only got them a few items cough then they show up Christmas morning needing help getting everything out of the car. These kids are appreciative but so, spoiled. It might snow here this weekend. I am hoping it holds off until they are out able to try their new wheels. My wife does the gift giving for the kid's teachers or bus drivers. She does not gift them all.

Brodman, after all these years of marriage trust me I know not to get my wife only a coffee maker or floor cleaner. We have tried out the Kinex and it's a nice addition to the xbox360. We certainly didn't spend $130-150 on it. Think by the time we were done with my wife's coupons it was about 60-70 dollars. Our kids are very active still don't want them sitting around using only their thumbs for exercise. The wii and now the kinex helps keep them moving while staying safely busy. I'm really looking forward to putting the Hotwheels super jump raceway together. One of the boys really wanted it and I saw it in action at the toy store.

Your dog playing and stealing the billiard balls is something I'd like to see. He probably thinks they are his new toys. What are you planning on putting in your basement? You said you are saving for 2 large gifts for the Spring what are they?

Glad you are taking the elderly lady out to dinner. I don't think it should be weird, why would it be? two people having a meal together.

My work hours are a tad off more than usual because I had to take time off and leave work early several times. Generally my hours are strange to most anyway. Over the last 2 decades I have had plenty of time to come to think of it as normal. I am a fireman unfortunately as Lieutenant it also means a lot of damn paperwork. I hate paperwork and leave it to the last possible moment. It doesn't really help because by then stacks upon stacks await me. This time of year it can be worse because many want to take their leave before the end of the year, which means more approvals and paperwork for me to do. We are also involved in some charities all having deadlines.

Shannon if you are picking up whipcream which sounds great as a cocoa topper how about some caramel to drizzle on top also?

I am so happy to hear everyone has Christmas plans. I will look forward to hearing about them all.

[Guest ASchwartz]

Hi Hotspot and All,

I agree that the kids are spoiled. Mine are now adults but I remember how much money we spent on gifts. Now I believe its the wrong approach and I would not do it again. It send the wrong message about being material. What do all of you think? Also, my wife, when we were younger, would not be pleased with an appliance for a gift unless something else was give too. Now, we have both changed and we both appreciate a new toaster. Its not the gift but the feelins that are most important. What do all of you think?

When people come over our hourse to have dinner, like on Christmas day, my dog, Sky, runs around grabbing everyones napkins, as though she is going something good and then brings them back. Its like, "Gee, look what I did, can I have a treat?" It is fun and we all laugh.

I'm not into holidays and I'm not religious. I believe its important to put fun and levity into all of this as a way of overcoming all the stress of the holidays.

Allan

[shanrucas]

Hi Allan, I haven't celebrated the holidays for many years, except to to get my mom a little something and putting up a tree, if it wasn't for her I probably wouldn't do that. Although this year I actually caught myself getting a little excited about tomorrow, why?, its because my moms caregiver is bringing over her children to open their gift..When I told my mom this her eyes twinkled, she loves kids, just seeing her reaction was the best gift I could of gotten and thats all I want. .

Yes, maybe children are over induged on christmas day,,as I look back I know I was, but parents also included a set of values with that, so I appreciated all I recieved, which I think Hotspot and Linda do from the sounds of it. Hotspot especially having foster children and giving them the sense of family.

I know I would of loved it if someone gave me a new microwave for the holidays...especially since my old one stopped working.

Allan, would you like to join us in some virtual hot cocoa? I have several kinds of toppings now.

[Lindamomof7]

Hi Allan to answer your question about the holidays. Over the last many years I have felt the same way that it is just materialistic time of year and I dont need a holiday to give anyone a gift and I cetrainly dont want to feel like I am forced to give one. But I had a wonderful magical christmas as a child so does that make me bad that I dont want to do all I can to make my childrens memories as magical?

My therapist and I spent almost the entire session talking about the holidays and how I dont want to celebrate it. But I have a catholic husband and children that go to church every week I guess I cant just skip by it. But for me it is an emotional time and mostly spent feeling sad over the lack of family (Dad and brother and Mom is dead) and also questioning the reason for the holiday that just causes so many problems finacially and emotionally for most.

To be honest, I hate showing my family my dissapointment in the holiday so I just assume not be here. I would easily check myself into the psych hospital where my "other" family is and have a week of hiding but I have realized this makes my family feel worse. So I guess I am in a no win situation...

Today we have the business Christmas party with catered food and all the bowling you can bowl. Normally it is nice but today I dont want to go, I could care less about seeing people, smiling and being the owner it is very conflicting for me... So I am thinking I will just stay home but I will see the disappointment in my childrens eyes as they try to drag me out with them....

[shanrucas]

Hey Linda, hang in there, its almost over. In the mean time you can't have to many (((hugs))). I'd rather go all out for St. Patricks day.

Well, I am really really trying to keep an open mind with Russell. But he's just hanging around alot. He's on vacation so he's been waiting for me at the stable every morning, I did give him a riding lesson yesterday, but I am just so short on time. Im just not attracted to him, he is very nice. I don't know if its that I have so much on my plate or what. It hit me today, he has a "soft" personality, thats the best I can describe it. He just agrees with me on everything, Im sure thats just his way of being polite..but I need someone with a stronger personality than I, I am more comfortable with that. Im afraid that I would unintentionally hurt his feelings, also he is seems to be clingy, I have a problem with that. I am trying to figure out a nice way of telling him to back off, I can't handle seeing him everyday..I need some time to myself. Anyone have suggestions, really I don't want to hurt his feelings, but I want to nip this in the bud.

Shannon

[brodman]

Linda sorry you dont like the holiday I dont care for it either I try to do a few special things mostly for my dog overall though it really is just another day Havin kids like you do is rough guess could think at least its almost over havin to put on happy face

hotspot a fireman now your username makes sense thats really cool and your hours make lots more sense guess 5 kids now compared to your job is piece of cake I went for new job interview early this week they called back want me to come again on Monday figured they wouldnt call back they had like 80 people for one job. If I get it will be nice added money. The 2 very large things I am saving for and plan on spending money on in the springtime is a new fence for my backyard I want a taller weather resistant one right now have all different kinds of fence from other properties closing Domino and me in. Gonna get nice new fence that will make and be more functional. Have a very big yard getting it done with cost of fence too is a pretty penny. Im also gettin a pool another major cost and providing the snow is gone construction for that will start in springtime. No clue what I will do with my basement it isnt on priority list still have other areas in house that need things. Eventually probably 2 to 4 years from now Ill have it finished its only partly finished and not at all what I would want. Wish I could catch Domino in the act of stealing the pool balls I dont mind him pushin them around on the table its the takin them that is problem. Have to catch him in act to fix problem. I thought the 3 ball was stuck inside tables ball return was gonna open it to find the ball now I know look in Dominos stuff till he learns no stealing the balls. Im gonna take the old lady to dinner on Sunday its kind of a dressy resturant Im gonna have to get dressed up.

Shanrucas i think you should just be honest with this guy. I get you dont want to hurt his feelins and all that but ya know he is a big boy and there is way to say what you want without it comin off as personal attack on guy Yous females do this good sometimes I think Tell him you dont have lots of time that going to the horses is only time you have alone without takin care of your mom Tell him would be better for you if you had plans to meet up insted of him just bein there waitin for you maybe he is hanging out more because he is on vacation maybe hes always there hopin for more with you Make sure he knows you arent interested not everyone is interested in everyone If he dont take those clear hints than when you get there go about what you usualy do without givin him ridin lessons or anything else unless there is somethin wrong with him he should catch on you are not interested if not give him to your horse sam to use as a big ball Im always upfront with girls some can think or say it insensitive I think its being honest and leaves no room for confusion

oh and thanks for gettin the whip cream carmell sounds good too

Now I see here somewhere that there is a dog that likes to steal napkins hmm maybe should get together with Domino for pool ball theft Dogs rule

hope yous all have good day tomorrow howeverr yous are spendin it Im gonna eat like Ive never done it before I got Domino his tux collar out and he got the old lady a gift too plannin for him to walk in carrying it in his mouth

[shanrucas]

brodman, Thanks for input, I would rather be honest with him than anything, I guess I just needed to hear someone elses perspective on it. You are right, he's a big boy. You made me laugh though when you said if he didn't get the hint, to give him to Sam...Thanks for brightening my day.

I can tell I would really love Domino, he sounds like a class act.

I wish you and Domino happy holidays:D

Shannon.

[Lindamomof7]

good morning..

well went to bed early like at 7pm. My daughter wanted me to help her wrap presents I said no and scurried up to my bedroom. Not for nothing but I asked her for the last 2 weeks to wrap when no one was home and while I was in the mood but the way she organizes the hecticness of presents for us 9 plus a few boy/girl friends she needs to "see" and make sure she has everything or too much before she wraps.

I understand that, I used to do the same thing but I learned the hard way even though I wrapped early as I was going and wrote down what I wrapped, it still drove me crazy because I had to reopen what I wraped!!!

So I get the "visual" thing...

Someone left the cats in and they woke me up at 3:30 to go out. Well that did it for me, guess i'm up now for good. So as I came down I saw all the gifts ok imagine 9 plus people gifts with stockings spread out over 2 rooms !!! :eek:

I had a feeling someone was down here with me as I was in the family room so I checked and sure enough there was an elf sleeping on my living room couch. The elf is my oldest daughters(24) boyfriend. He stays over some times but not in the suite with my daughter and my other daughter. Have to set some standards around here for the rest of the kids you know...

So now I am trying to be quiet but this keyboard is making clickety clack noises so I am typing very quietly... It looks like santa brought me a new desk chair. My son plopped it my other new one and broke it...

and I made eggs I was soooo hungry. My meals yesterday consisted of chips, cookies and baked french fries, nice comfort foods right??? So I was really hungry...

The only thing I really did buy was a new flat screen tv for my bedroom and one for my girls suite. They deserve it they have been so helpful taking up slack from me and my stuff so even if it wasnt christmas I would have still bought it....

Remember, I'm still not driving so online shopping delivered right to the door has been wonderful well except for maybe my husband who will end up with the bill...

[Guest ASchwartz]

OOOOOH, Linda,

Those eggs sound yummy. Could you send some my way too???

Allan

[Lindamomof7]

Absolutely Allan, How would you like them cooked? And with coffee, tea or hot coco??

[shanrucas]

Hey I think I made it through the holidays, just relaxing now and I don't have anything to worry about except to make sure mom is comfortable, she's doing ok so far.

I hope everyone else survives too. Im looking forward to just curling up with the dogs for awhile. .

[Lindamomof7]

Hey Ok I made it through too Shannon. My 12 yr old daughter woke up to throwing up. Merry Christmas to her!!! Hotspot as you know if its a holiday, a kid will get sick!!!

I actually felt pretty social this morning maybe cause all of the commotion was done with regarding"gifts" My girls did a great job, they forgot to wrap a few things but thats ok. Thats what Mom is for. hehehe

So as the day went on I got a fever, so I slept and just woke up feeling feverish only, so that is good...

We are awaiting a 8-12 inch snow storm for tomorrow night. My kids are exited especially since they got snowboarding stuff for christmas and my land is set up on a hill so they get to go sledding and snowboarding.

Maybe I will set up the outside firepit and make some hot cocoa. Anyone coming to join us???

[shanrucas]

Hi Linda,

I hope you don't have what my mom refers to as the "Christmas Crud", she says its always somebodys duty to get sick on the holidays.

oh boy,,sitting by a fire pit sounds so cozy and fun...I will bring the cocoa:D.

[Lindamomof7]

Hi Shannon

well surprisedly I slept most of the afternoon with a fever and then as the day went on I felt better... go figure. But my poor daughter can't move a muscle and has hijacked my couch. Just trying to get her up to her bed now but she is so weak... and luckily she has not thrown up anymore...

I bet hotspot had a fun filled day today. Brings back memories of when we used to buy toys. This year was Tv's and wii games and nintendo dsi games, clothes, snowboarding stuff, car stuff for the boys and fun stuff....

We did a combo birthday/christmas gift for my girls with an elliptical and a tv so they are quite happy and well deserving of something really nice that they wouldnt normally buy themselves even though they have more money then we do!! :-))

Jay and I just ate some shrimp and watched the end of Christmas Story. Love the ending... makes me want chinese food!!!

ok so how does chinese food go with hot cocoa??

[shanrucas]

Hi Linda

I slept most of the afternoon too, mom was so comfortable, a rare moment so I totally took advantage. It felt so good.

Im sorry to hear that your daughter was feeliing sick, I hope she gets better soon.

I love that part of the Christmas Story too, it makes me laugh every time. I have never had Chinese with hot cocoa before, willing to try though.

[Hotspot]

I'm happy you both had a good Christmas day. Even having a fever you seem to have had a decent day Linda. Shannon how did the gift string hunt go? Brodman, still waiting to hear how your day with Domino went spending it with the elderly woman.

My day has been a long fun one. The kids woke up at about 6 which was only around 4hrs since my wife and I had headed to bed. I had to make the rounds to the neighbors houses where most of the presents were hidden. Then spent time getting several full of batteries. It was insanity here with everything around the tree. With 7 of us, 2 grandparents and 3 former foster kids of ours coming over the living room was taken over with piles of gifts.

While the kids were attempting to find out which piles were theirs, I headed into the kitchen to see my wife's response over her new coffee maker. My wife always signs the presents with either Love Santa or Mom and Dad. Our new addition comes running in the kitchen letting us know Santa knows he is living with us now because he found his pile. My wife and I headed back in with liquid awakeness to start the gift wrap flying extravaganza. And off they went getting into their presents several breaks in between because they wanted to play with some of their new toys.

My parents show up about 8am with a lot more gifts. By 9am we are sitting on the porch having more coffee and sticky buns while the kids are riding up and back with their new wheels. By 11 we are all back inside to finish opening gifts and to do stockings. Have r/c ATVs and helicopters zipping all around us, a Big Foot walking around on his own. My father and I are trying to assemble the indoor basketball shootout game he got the kids. My wife is making lunch. After lunch my mother went out with the kids to play more with their new wheels. My father and I are still assembling the new shootout, my wife busy cooking away our dinner.

Then came time to assemble the Hotwheels super jump raceway oh what fun that thing is. Spent most of the afternoon playing with all the new toys and watching the stack of DVDs my folks got the kids. 3 of our former foster kids showed up we exchanged gifts and they got right into playing with the kids. We then feasted for dinner.

The kids helped clean up the living room and take most of the toys to their respective rooms. Around 9pm everyone started to leave. The kids were beat had their showers and baths right to sleep they went.

It was a long day but with a lot of enjoyment. I went to spend some time alone with my wife. Helped dry some of the items she won't put in the dishwasher. We then went for a well deserved and needed soak in the hot tub. Mrs Claus is now sleeping and I hope to join her soon.

Well that was my day.

[brodman]

yeah Domino and I had nice time with the old lady. Sounds like you had a zoo at your place. Shanrucas did the kids find the gifts? I had lots and lots of food then she really wanted to see some of the christmas lights in her neighborhood Domino and I took her for drive all around.

When we got back for dessert she got phone call she has 2 daughters 1 dont live in the same state the other lives around 10 minutes away neither sent her anything beyond a card anyway it was the daughter that lives 10 minutes away callin to wish her merry christmas it was sad really ive been on the phone longer orderin chinese food or a pizza

daughter must have asked about coming over tomorrow night and to borrow money again cause I heard her tell her no she isnt giving her anymore and dont bother coming over because she is going out to dinner guess the daughter asked where with who etc old lady was like non of your buisness and hung up I could have been raised by wolves and faired better but here are 2 of her kids that want nothin but money from their mother. No family is perfect but to not send your own mother that is like this lady a gift or invite her over for christmas or come over or anything is really low. I dont want to be in the middle of any of it but she told me it all really went downhill in relationship with daughters after her husband died and she wouldnt sell the house to give them money

anyway so Im going to see my friend this morning and going to take the old lady to her resturant for dinner highly doubt it will be anything like how she cooks

[Lindamomof7]

Hey guys sounds like we all did make it through the day pretty well.

Hotspot I could feel the love and excitement as I was reading and that is wonderful for all of you ...

Brodman sounds like those daughters are a heck of a mooch. Isn't it terrible how kids EXPECT money or material things from their parents... it is so sad.. I too have also seen how children can act so disgustidly when it comes to respecting their parents.

I know of some who put the house in their kids names for tax purposes and also so they can collect from the government and not have to pay for nursing home but then they go ahead and sell the house and keep the money and leave the parents left with nothing. This all only after a transfer of real estate to help protect turns into a major loss of abandonment .... really sucks...

Ok so we are expecting 12-18 incehes of snow today with blizzard like conditions. Anyone else expecting snow today??

I sure hope we don't lose power like last year so if you don't hear from me thats what is happening. I will be curled up near the fire and trying to keep an autistic son occupied...

Off to store real quick and maybe pick up some chinese food to bring home :-))

[shanrucas]

Hotspot, Oh what fun, I had a picture in my mind of what it must of been like at your house, reminds me of my child hood christmas'. I love what your new addition said about Santa finding out where he lived now, how wonderful.

Brodman, I am so glad you are there for the elderly woman, I certainly understand what it must be like for her regarding her daughters, mom and I get the same treatment from her sister, except fortunately she doesn't ask for money she and her husband are well off. She did do a "fly by" on christmas eve, I wasn't here, moms caregiver, Crystal was, she said that my mom pretended to be asleep, hmmm.

Hey Linda, your finally going to get that chinese food you been wanting, I would like some sweet and sour pork please..

Crystals kids had fun..Trevon, her oldest is 8 and her daughter Jasmine is 2, At 7 in the morning here comes Trevon, I open the door and ask him whats up..he gave me this wonderful look and he was following the string. It was so good to have them over, we had cinnamon rolls and watched them open their presents.. I felt that mom and I had an actual Christmas, she was wiped out afterwards so the 2 of us took a long nap.

I woke up to one doozy of a thunder storm, it shook the house, now its raining real hard.

Shannon

[Lindamomof7]

hahaha Shannon, went out early this morning before the storm and I ended up at Mcdonalds with my son. I think next week I will be driving so I KNOW one of my trips will be chinese food and my favorite is shrimp with cashews and veges. Got to get the veges in ya know???

Right now taking a break from cleaning up from christmas ... so I will see you on Face book...