females views etc (Trigger Warning!)

[Jessie]

LOL

Ironically on the 15th April the Sun and the Mail newspapers both ran large prominent articles on research confirming how important size is too women.

Are you going to ask them to delete their articles?

Do you think its possible many men would have seen such articles?

Do you think they should ban Games of Thrones too?

Or should we perhaps pretend that these newspapers and that TV series do not exist?

[IrmaJean]

Jessie wrote: So I like articles or clips as they mirror my experiences….. to some extent it is cathartic… this place is pretty much my only outlet currently to voice my despair

This is important to know. It's also good to know that you are open to positive thoughts and suggestions as well.

I understand the concern. I hear what you are saying too, Jess and Klingsor.

Let's continue, but with a trigger warning in the title.

I will say that I personally strongly disapprove of this kind of shaming. Also, it isn't the point here, but my hope is that voices like mine count equally.

Editing to add: I will add the trigger warning as soon as I have a desktop available to use.

[Shrimp Fried Life]

quote

 

In 10 years as a sex therapist and 20 years as a marital therapist, I've had gobs of complaints from women whose partners were too big for comfortable sex. I've only had 2 in 20 years about her partner being too small. The first woman had a vaginal laxity after childbirth (previously, he had been "just right" and the second woman had marvelous orgasms with the small man but had a mental block.

Laurie Watson - fellow PT Blogger on Married and Still Doing It

[tcnewexp]

I like the idea of allowing the postings but with the trigger warnings. 

The internet is filled with both sides. Woman claiming size is a big deal and woman claiming size doesn't matter, or doesn't matter much. But as has been mentioned, mainstream society has made it generally acceptable to joke about them or those who have them.  IMO, that is what is so hurtful. Those who are or feel they are "small" in that department, feel like the butt of everyone's joke and it's humiliating. 

If people joke or ridicule about someone's weight, while assholes will defend it, many people will come out to defend the person or people. Tell a joke about a woman's flat breasts, you'll get the same reaction. Yet, tell a joke about a man's small penis, and the overwhelming reaction is laughter or ignoring it. Nobody seems to jump up to defend those with small penis. It's probably because those of us who suffer from it are hiding it.

Take this example: A group of people, a mix of friends and strangers, are talking at a social event (reception). One of the people tells a humiliating joke about women with small breasts. One of the people in the group has very small breasts. Chances are that woman, or someone in that group, many a bunch of people, would say something to let that person know the joke is not acceptable. Take that same example and replace "women with small breasts" with "men with small penises" and almost every time everyone in the group with laugh. Even the person who has a small penis and in incredibly offended will more than likely fake laugh so they don't "out" themselves as having a small penis. In all 46 years of my life, I have yet to hear a person say anything about a small penis joke being offensive. 

Fact is, until a majority of society is willing to stand up against people who ridicule small penises, the jokes will continue and so will the shaming. I wish I could say, "I'm strong enough to be a leader for that cause" but I am not. I am one of those who pretends to laugh and awkwardly take a drink. 

[Shrimp Fried Life]

quote

(written in answer to a question " I wonder....do us men worry more about our small penis size than women worry about their small breast size!)

 

I think there are similarities in that both men and women worry about being at least average or normal. No ones like falling below average on anything - including height, weight, looks, vital measurements, etc. And when society is screaming that you have to have big breasts or a big penis, it's sure to get to anyone who falls short. But I think there are two big differences. First, we get to actually see breasts out in the general public, so despite the ever-present push for larger breasts, we also get to see small breasts, so there is a balance. Every time there is a beautiful woman in the public eye with small or normal breasts, it lessens the pressure. Men don't get that. Just claims of everyone else's giant penis sizes and if yours doesn't measure up, you'd better buy this product!!! And it's relentless.

Another difference is that I think more of a man's whole opinion of his sexual self is tied to his penis because that's pretty much his whole package is as far as what's actually being brought to the table, physically. Women on the other hand have other stuff to fall back on, we don't just bring our breasts to bed, we also have a vagina - which I would think is more important than breasts - and our bottoms (which tend to have a larger roll in lovemaking than men's bottoms, as cute as they may be). Again, it spreads out the areas to fixate on...( just read some of those posts by women who aren't happy with their labia... sad...)

Anyway, hope I've made some sense here. I can totally understand why a man with a small penis (or who's been convinced he has a small penis) would be upset with the constant anti-small-penis bombardment... Heck, I get those e-mails all the time too, and even I'm insulted! Sorry I'm not the right XY to answer the original question, just this hijacking one...

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written by a woman.

[Shrimp Fried Life]

From what I've read, 5" is the average size(you can search this info on the internet!). My EX always seemed like he was large to me and one day we actually measured him and he was less than 6"! We were shocked! So I don't know what you consider small. To me, 6" was uncomfortable and had to be worked up to gradually, I've never had kids so this could be why? Now my BF is probably just under 5" and erect it looks plenty large to me too and what his size is(we haven't gotten out the tape measure though) is just the right size for me...coupled with the fact that he's into making me feel good and lasts at least 15 minutes...his size is just right!

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My ex for over 3 years was way under 5". But, the sex was GREAT every time.

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My guy is "smaller" (he's just above avg.)then what I have had in the past, but he is the only guy that has ever made me orgasm from sex. Kiesha

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Small is not bad if you have the right lover

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[Shrimp Fried Life]

A special video for those of you who think going for Asian girls is the answer.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JGhyZmN2dkE

[Jessie]

um Roger…

I dont know if you posted the wrong video or something but to quote her:

"most black men have big dicks'

"I have seen some freakishly small ones"

"If I can close my fingers around it and the fingers touch…. then its skinny…. and we can't get along"

"it has to have length AND girth…… then we gonna get along just fine"

(she did eventually say that really big penises were no good for her too)

[Jessie]

14 hours ago, lifelongvirgin said:

A special video for those of you who think going for Asian girls is the answer.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JGhyZmN2dkE

This is a very honest clip

"wasted my time in an unfulfilling relationship"

"I tried to ride it but it was so small it was unsatisfying"

"he put me on a guilt trip"   "I was a different person back then"

"but you get to see his dick and its uggghhhh….. fu*k my life"

"the mexican had a tiny dick too,,,,, I'm approaching 30…. so I have not got time for small dicks anymore…"

"small AND can't get it up AND wont wear a condom!"

"I know it sounds shallow but its a big part of attraction"

[Jessie]

 

just making sure that caucasian girls are also given a fair hearing…

[IrmaJean]

I did not watch the clips. I find them personally offensive. I did read some of the quotes you posted, Jess. Can you see how the women refer to the men they have been with as if they are objects rather than human beings? Men are human beings; they are not genitals here to please and satisfy women. My thoughts.

[Jessie]

Irma,

I understand she/they were objectifying to a degree but they were also very fair and were not begin unduly critical.

We ALL judge to a degree on physical attractiveness.

I could not find an 90yo obese woman attractive even if she was a wonderful, amusing, caring person.

So I have my own filters.

These women will forgive some imperfections in potential partners but not others. thats fair enough- we all do the same.

Alas, its bad news for me, that my particular imperfection, is so widely ridiculed and is usually a deal breaker for the vast majority of women.

[Jessie]

Roger,

Oh- you kinda surprised me…. I thought you were going to say you posted the wrong video by mistake.

I thought her estimations were on the higher side, she didnt give numbers but her estimations of minimum sizes were large-average I thought.

I think the average is BP 6.5 x5 for Caucasians…. maybe as a black lady her experiences have been higher - dunno.

ps I quite agree with the lady in the clip,and you, when you talk about the importance of girth.

I have heard this many times from women in real iife and is backed up overwhelmingly by multiple studies

[Resolute]

1 hour ago, IrmaJean said:

Can you see how the women refer to the men they have been with as if they are objects rather than human beings? Men are human beings; they are not genitals here to please and satisfy women. My thoughts.

can you tell us what "human beings" means?

[Jessie]

1 hour ago, RogerJay said:

Well she has another video where she says (girth being okay) anything as long or longer than a cardboard loo-roll would be good for her.

I mean...that's setting the bar fairly low...isn't it?

I thought she was pretty fair on the whole. But hey, I'm only human here - I may be being swayed by confirmation bias?

EDIT: And heck yeah, I am well and truly exceeding that loo-roll test myself! (But hence the danger of bias, maybe?)

well in that case she is guilty of inconsistency then isn't she?

which video to we believe, the loo roll test or her palm + longest finger test? (they are very different)

Not that it matters to me- Im much thinner than a loo roll and just slightly shorter, by a fraction… meh…

[IrmaJean]

All of us are whole people. We are not penises and vaginas; these are parts of our physical bodies. I have seen some of you refer to yourselves sometimes as if you are your penis. 

Jessie, it's true that people have personal preferences, but I think that is very different from treating and talking about another person as if they are an object. It's the difference between a woman saying something such as, "I prefer that the men that I am with have a larger penis"  and " I'm approaching 30…. so I have not got time for small dicks anymore…" (as you previously quoted). 

[Jessie]

Irma,

I quite agree we are more than just body parts. And I too am disappointed when I hear people talk so crudely.

When I was working I was often appalled at some of the attitudes I heard from both genders.

Nethertheless it's not really the semantics that bother me….

To me there is no substantive difference between a woman saying "with respect, Im not sexually attracted to, or compatible with, men who have small penises" to "I wont touch small dicks".

One is more polite I accept - but the end result for me is precisely the same.

[Shrimp Fried Life]

13 hours ago, RogerJay said:

@lifelongvirgin

she claims to be looking for 9.5 or 10 inches - but in truth this is a very rare size that would be notably big even among porn stars! 

 

 

Yeah I noticed that too. She wishes she could take that much. From watching lots of porn it seems to me that most women can't take much more than 6 or 7 inches. Very few can take more than that. You've heard that old phrase "your eyes are bigger than your belly" well for these women their eyes are bigger than their vaginas.

But if I was that Asian woman's EX and I found out she posted that on the internet I'd probably be hanging from a rope soon after.

Why do women feel the need to do this stuff? are there videos made by guys talking about intimate aspects of their ex wives posted on the internet?

[IrmaJean]

The objectifying, if a person takes it in, could lead to a lack of self respect and acceptance of this kind of treatment as being okay, which.. it isn't. I do hear you. I'm sorry your relationships haven't worked out. I hope you will keep trying.

[Resolute]

7 minutes ago, lifelongvirgin said:

Why do women feel the need to do this stuff? are there videos made by guys talking about intimate aspects of their ex wives posted on the internet?

videos posted by men are usually about their exploits, endeavors, adventures with women etc.. they're usually not about making fun of physical attributes. i guess women do the opposite since they can't exactly do the same thing.

[Shrimp Fried Life]

This is what some ***** wrote in reply to a video for the Short Dick Man song

 

" LOVE THIS SONG!! "Isn't that cute an extra belly button" reminds me of the time that I turned a guy down because he had a botched circumcision..OMG too funny "

 

WTF?

[skynight]

20 hours ago, lifelongvirgin said:

 

Why do women feel the need to do this stuff? are there videos made by guys talking about intimate aspects of their ex wives posted on the internet?

Most women don't do this. The few that do, I know it says in the Bible not to judge, but I do wonder about the morality and self respect of a woman who would post a video about the numerous different penises she's sucked and had sex with. It isn't a normal behaviour, and most women would be too embarrassed to do this. Also many of these videos that Jessie puts up, maybe it's just me over thinking, but I often sense passive aggressiveness with many of these women. Women will and do use penis size to have a go at men and it's a very good way of hurting a lot of men. Women have less power in this world, and penis ridicule is an equaliser for women, but only if men allow it to get to them. 

 

[skynight]

Yes me to, I liked and cared for the opinions of women who made vids like this myself. I'm far from perfect, and I'm not better then anyone. 

[Resolute]

2 hours ago, skynight said:

Most women don't do this. The few that do, I know it says in the Bible not to judge, but I do wonder about the morality and self respect of a woman who would post a video about the numerous different penises she's sucked and had sex with. It isn't a normal behaviour, and most women would be too embarrassed to do this. Also many of these videos that Jessie puts up, maybe it's just me over thinking, but I often sense passive aggressiveness with many of these women. Women will and do use penis size to have a go at men and it's a very good way of hurting a lot of men.

mostly true.

 

2 hours ago, skynight said:

Women have less power in this world, and penis ridicule is an equaliser for women, but only if men allow it to get to them.

maybe they had less power a few thousand years ago (when dinosaurs roamed the earth lol just kidding), but now it's men that lack power.

[Resolute]

1 hour ago, RogerJay said:

Well now, taking the whole Bible (Old and New Testament) together, I reckon it's fine to go right ahead and say some quite tough things here: these women are promiscuous, they have loose morals, they are easy numbers - and ultimately they just don't value themselves very highly. They are (as a school friend of mine used to say) "shag-pieces".

shag-pieces lol. i have my own name for them but i'll keep it to myself.

 

1 hour ago, RogerJay said:

But then again, I am being a total hypocrite here! Because, when I was a youngster, that was just exactly the kind of woman I liked. (Shouldn't have but did.)

one can't deny the appeal of these kinds of women, slutty as they may be.

 

1 hour ago, RogerJay said:

If people did what the Bible tells 'em (get married ASAP, stay faithful, have a family, etc.) This whole SPS thing wouldn't even have appeared on the radar, probably.

"get married asap, stay faithful, have a family"? are you serious? this is also a recipe for disaster. it's like telling someone choose one food and stick with it for the rest of your life. in practice this doesn't work well, specially for real men. telling a man to "stay faithful" is essentially emasculating him.